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Baptist Humor
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Re: Baptist Humor
Bless You, Brother Peter, and might I add to that?
"What God has Revealed to Atheists": -
Re: Baptist Humor
Originally posted by SUV View Post
I love it!
-----------Here's a fresh one that I just wrote for you!
By His enterprises
our Pastor Brown has grown so cash-rich
we call him Reverend GREEN today.Comment
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Re: Baptist Humor
Bless you again, Brother! Hit them where it Hurts!!!Originally posted by Poetic Peter View Post
I love it!
-----------Here's a fresh one that I just wrote for you!
By His enterprises
our Pastor Brown has grown so cash-rich
we call him Reverend GREEN today.
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..................................................Originally posted by SUV View PostBless you again, Brother! Hit them where it Hurts!!!
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Re: Baptist Humor
I Simply meant that athian "people" - Sinful as they are - could never expect any GREEN in their "lives"!Originally posted by Poetic Peter View Post..................................................
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Re: Baptist Humor
Cream of the Coop:
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Re: Baptist Humor
My heart burns for JESUS!!!!! 
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Re: Baptist Humor
Originally posted by SUV View PostMy heart burns for JESUS!!!!!
My heartburn's for Jesus!Comment
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Re: Baptist Humor
Q: Why did Caine bludgeon his brother?
A: Because! He was able.
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Re: Baptist Humor
Did he do it with a cain?Originally posted by Poetic Peter View PostQ: Why did Caine bludgeon his brother?
A: Because! He was able.
(Oh! Isn't trying to decipher the Bible just ever so much fun?!)Comment
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Christ-killing Humor
A little yid boy says to his hooknosed father "Daddy! Can I borrow fifty cents?"
His father replies "FORTY CENTS?! What on earth do you want to borrow thirty cents for?"O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
- Catholic perversion throughout history
- Does it matter how we praise the Lord?
- How the King James Bible Saved me from anal sex!
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.Comment
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anecdotal joke
Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
Kudos, Brother! That's wonderfully keen and perfectly fresh and true to life.
True to life? Yes!
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I'm gonna try to cook up a monologue joke with a message.
Maybe comedian Jay Leno will buy it!
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didja hear about...
The END of the Rural Mormon
A Mormon, Reuben, needed wiping.
Too bad but his privy's supply had run low:
there was one last corncob and one Book of Mormon.
Just behind the "throne" lay King James' Bible
which Reuben read there on the sly, and which he hid away like porn.
Now how to wipe?
Reuben thought to leave the cob for his wives and spawn to share.
Reuben should have torn a page from Joseph Smith's new book of lies...
instead of Deuteronomy.
At the first rub of holy paper Reuben's anus scintillated,
burst in flames, erupted incandescent gases red and blue and white.
"Owww! Owww! Owww! I guess I've learned the TRUTH by God!"
And so Reuben burned like hell. In fact he's there and burning still!
Last edited by Poetic Peter; 01-15-2007, 06:02 AM.Comment
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Re: anecdotal joke
I read down and saw a joke involving my name! It's true! Atheists can NEVER get as GREEN as I. Those Jew-boy accountants help too. (Shhhhhh don't tell them they are going to Hell for being Jew!)Comment
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