My Poetry

[TheLordSavedMe]

Here is a poem I wrote. I wrote it when I read a poem about Jesus and I thought I should write one too.


JESUS is my BFF
He's the only 1 4 me!
I love Him more than cherry pie
or pizza that is FREE!



JESUS is my BFF

He's never let me down
I tell them all I LOVE him so
All around my town!



JESUS is my BFF

But SINNERS must look out
Cuz He will SMITE them mighty quick
And then their tongues fall out!


Wadda ya think?






Tammi

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: My Poetry

I think that a book of True Christian™ poetry would be a wonderful fundraising tool for a creative congregation.

Naturally, I'm thinking of Second Baptist of North Salem.

But I suppose a book comprising poems from multiple congregations could provide more revenues for the multiple congregations to share in a proportional manner.

I was just inspired to craft some verses for a song, to a familiar tune:

Jesus hates you, this I know
You're an atheistic ho
Straight to Hell for every whore
He will burn you, evermore.

Yes, Jesus hates you
Yes, Jesus hates you
Yes, Jesus hates you
He'll burn you evermore.

Jesus hates you, scientist
Evolution has Him pissed
You deny Creation's tale
Evermore in Hell you'll wail.

Jesus hates every Hindu
And the Muslim and the Jew
Deny Him for worldly gain
Eternity you'll spend in pain.

[Didymus Much]

Re: My Poetry

...Wadda ya think?...

Fetchez monsieur une bucket.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: My Poetry

Fetchez monsieur une bucket.

Por vous.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: My Poetry

Fetchez monsieur une bucket.

You leave Tammi alone, you unsaved bastard!

[Mrs. Naomi Portway]

Re: My Poetry

Tammi, that is a very pretty poem. Thank you for writing it, it made my day a little nicer. A boar stepped on my foot yesterday and it's all swollen, but Aaron said that God has a reason for everything and then he told me to walk it off.

YIC

Mrs. Naomi Portway

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: My Poetry

Jesus hates you, this I know
You're an atheistic ho
Straight to Hell for every whore
He will burn you, evermore.

Yes, Jesus hates you
Yes, Jesus hates you
Yes, Jesus hates you
He'll burn you evermore.

Jesus hates you, scientist
Evolution has Him pissed
You deny Creation's tale
Evermore in Hell you'll wail.

Jesus hates every Hindu
And the Muslim and the Jew
Deny Him for worldly gain
Eternity you'll spend in pain.

This is a truly inspired song, Reverend! With your permission, I'd like to teach this to my children as part of their homeschool education. Not only is it a good reminder for them when faced with the evils of the world, but it's a fine tool for introducing the Gospel!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: My Poetry

This is a truly inspired song, Reverend! With your permission, I'd like to teach this to my children as part of their homeschool education. Not only is it a good reminder for them when faced with the evils of the world, but it's a fine tool for introducing the Gospel!

Please, be my guest, Sister!

Just be sure to add "© 2012, Mark Rodimer" to any printed copies or websites where you might post it. And if it goes into a for-sale publication, we can talk about licensing fees.

[Didymus Much]

Re: My Poetry

...Just be sure to add "© 2012, Landover Baptist Church" to any printed copies or websites where you might post it. And if it goes into a for-sale publication, we can talk about tithing any license fees to Landover.

FTFY. Read the TOS again, Rev.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: My Poetry

FTFY. Read the TOS again, Rev.

I suppose I will just have to publish everything elsewhere before sharing it here, if Landover wishes to profit from my work. A shame that I can't share my ideas here without someone trying to steal them.

After all, once published elsewhere, the copyright will already be established.

And there are 6 other verses.

[Noah Sole]

Re: My Poetry

Hi Tammi, I came up with this:

I speak with authority
Because I live in authority
Because I HAVE authority
Authority to rebuke
To receive
Authority to speak
To sing praises
Everywhere I go
I won't hold back
It's my authority
I come in the name of Christ
So no weapon formed against me
Shall prosper
You can talk
But I'll still keep walking
Walking in authority
Living life without apology
It's not wrong
I belong
So you MIGHT as well get used to me.

What dya think?

[shy Rita]

Re: My Poetry

Hi Tammi, I came up with this:

I speak with authority
Because I live in authority
Because I HAVE authority
Authority to rebuke
To receive
Authority to speak
To sing praises
Everywhere I go
I won't hold back
It's my authority
I come in the name of Christ
So no weapon formed against me
Shall prosper
You can talk
But I'll still keep walking
Walking in authority
Living life without apology
It's not wrong
I belong
So you MIGHT as well get used to me.

What dya think?

I'm going to jump in here. I recognize that poem!! Are you sure you are the writer of that poem? It brings back memories.

[Noah Sole]

Re: My Poetry

I'm going to jump in here. I recognize that poem!! Are you sure you are the writer of that poem? It brings back memories.

Well thanks 'Shy' Rita... you've got me into trouble with the Pastors now!!
I did not say I wrote the poem! (although I did put in the lovely embellishments - do you like them). Pastor Zeke wrote this poem - I only said I came up with it - that doesn't mean write it. An apology would be nice and please explain to Pastor Zeke the mess up caused by you jumping to ridiculous conclusions

YIC

[Jack O'fagan]

Re: My Poetry

Jack the atheist

What would I be if I turned to hate God?
If I was an atheist, a wretched sod.

Would I still see design in a beautiful flower
or would I be soaking in a stranger's golden shower?

Would I still feel joy in being 'holy ghost'ed
or would I be in a truck stop being spit roasted?

Would I be out shouting 'Jesus is True!'
or sat at home masturbating over 'Hitch-22'?

Would I be rebuking the demons in cripples?
No, I'd be in a gimp mask with clamps on my nipples.




YIC


Jack

[Noah Sole]

Re: My Poetry

Jack the atheist

What would I be if I turned to hate God?
If I was an atheist, a wretched sod.

Would I still see design in a beautiful flower
or would I be soaking in a stranger's golden shower?

Would I still feel joy in being 'holy ghost'ed
or would I be in a truck stop being spit roasted?

Would I be out shouting 'Jesus is True!'
or sat at home masturbating over 'Hitch-22'?

Would I be rebuking the demons in cripples?
No, I'd be in a gimp mask with clamps on my nipples.




YIC


Jack

It means nothing without emoticons. Have another go.

YIC