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  • Daisy Mae Johnson
    The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
    Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
    aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 15708

    #1

    Calling All LOL's - Emergency Meeting!

    Hello Sisters,

    It has come to my attention that this little WHORE has been trying to entice MY honeypie, Pastor Zeke to cheat on me. She has been trying to tempt him with rather racy photos and from what I can gather very slutty PM's to him.

    http://www.landoverbaptist.net/member.php?u=4958

    I need your help with ideas on what to do with this gutter slut?

    P/S: Please feel free to harass her if you'd like. I know we don't take kindly to wanton sluts around here.

    Sister Thumper
    sigpic

    Tweet me Here
    My GODLY Bio Here
  • Old Iron Crotch
    SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
    • May 2007
    • 3056

    #2
    Re: Calling All LOL's Emergency Meeting!

    Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
    Hello Sisters,

    It has come to my attention that this little WHORE has been trying to entice MY honeypie, Pastor Zeke to cheat on me. She has been trying to tempt him with rather racy photos and from what I can gather very slutty PM's to him.

    http://www.landoverbaptist.net/member.php?u=4958

    I need your help with ideas on what to do with this gutter slut?

    P/S: Please feel free to harass her if you'd like. I know we don't take kindly to wanton sluts around here.

    Sister Thumper

    I wouldn't worry about it - Zeke isn't much into girls anyway.
    Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!

    Comment

    • Daisy Mae Johnson
      The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
      Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
      aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 15708

      #3
      Re: Calling All LOL's Emergency Meeting!

      Originally posted by Dances without Joy View Post
      I wouldn't worry about it - Zeke isn't much into girls anyway.
      Get lost Bitch. Don't dull down this thread.

      sigpic

      Tweet me Here
      My GODLY Bio Here

      Comment

      • Talitha
        Deaconess
        Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
        True Christian™
        • May 2026
        • 15118

        #4
        Re: Calling All LOL's Emergency Meeting!

        I have the DOF File with me now Sister.

        Perhaps an invite on one of our hunting shopping trips is in order?

        Sister Talitha

        Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


        HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
        being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



        Comment

        • SUV
          True Christian™ Princess
          The Driving Force behind RA12
          Have at it, anytime!
          • Sep 2006
          • 11027

          #5
          Re: Calling All LOL's Emergency Meeting!

          The Cokes just called - and they want their bottles back

          Comment

          • KJV4me
            Forum Member
            Forum Member
            • Apr 2008
            • 80

            #6
            Re: Calling All LOL's Emergency Meeting!

            This is most alarming!!

            Sister, I don't know if you have anything like this available to you, but I securely affix chastity belts onto all my daughters naughty zones once they reach the age of 12:




            Perhaps this succubus could be likewise restrained?

            Comment

            • Daisy Mae Johnson
              The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
              Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
              aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 15708

              #7
              Re: Calling All LOL's - Emergency Meeting!

              She is just such a whore! She must be out of her mind too!

              What would a gorgeous guy like my Handsome Honeypie be doing with a gutter slut like that?!??

              Why, she's probably had more hands up her skirt than a muppet.
              Attached Files
              sigpic

              Tweet me Here
              My GODLY Bio Here

              Comment

              • Pastor Ezekiel
                Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                 
                • Sep 2006
                • 78556

                #8
                Re: Calling All LOL's - Emergency Meeting!

                Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
                She is just such a whore! She must be out of her mind too!

                What would a gorgeous guy like my Handsome Honeypie be doing with a gutter slut like that?!??

                Why, she's probably had more hands up her skirt than a muppet.
                Aw, shucks, you're embarrassing me sister.

                Why do all you ladies like that photgraph of me they used for the church calendar so much?
                Who Will Jesus Damn?

                Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                Comment

                • tLakota
                  Forum Member
                  Forum Member
                  • Dec 2007
                  • 206

                  #9
                  Re: Calling All LOL's - Emergency Meeting!

                  Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
                  Hello Sisters,

                  It has come to my attention that this little WHORE has been trying to entice MY honeypie, Pastor Zeke to cheat on me. She has been trying to tempt him with rather racy photos and from what I can gather very slutty PM's to him.

                  http://www.landoverbaptist.net/member.php?u=4958

                  I need your help with ideas on what to do with this gutter slut?

                  P/S: Please feel free to harass her if you'd like. I know we don't take kindly to wanton sluts around here.

                  Sister Thumper
                  Holy Crap She's FUGLY!!!!!! Is that really her? She needs a makeover or something.... Even I don't look that bad! I don't think you have anything to worry about, chicky. There's no way Zeke would be into 'that'. You know? But if she's sending scanty pictures there's something wrong there. I'd like to see what she'd say in her defense.
                  Willpower rules the world.

                  Comment

                  • Mrs. Mary Whitford
                    Ladies of Landover Senior VP
                    One of the Truest Christians™ Ever
                    Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
                    True Christian™
                    • Dec 2006
                    • 12414

                    #10
                    Re: Calling All LOL's - Emergency Meeting!

                    That wench has been a bane of our existence ever since we first took notice of her tiny jungle island. Frankly she has me worried for the safety of our brave missionaries come this July. I wouldn't be surprised if she meets them with open arms and a belt full of explosives.
                    Posted via Prayer

                    1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
                    Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

                    Blogging for CHRIST!
                    Witnessing for GOD on YouTube!
                    All a-Twitter for Salvation!
                    Bringing Jesus to MySpace!
                    On FIRE for the Lord on Facebook!
                    My Ladies of Landover profile!

                    Comment

                    • Wide-Open
                      Director of European Evangelical Outreach
                      A Shining Example of Christ's Love
                      Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
                      True Christian™
                      • Nov 2007
                      • 18449

                      #11
                      Re: Calling All LOL's - Emergency Meeting!

                      Sister Thumper, I was asked to close this thread as you probably feel bad about it. I hope that is OK with you? Let me know!
                      Psalm 81:10:
                      I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
                      open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.

                      Comment

                      • Wide-Open
                        Director of European Evangelical Outreach
                        A Shining Example of Christ's Love
                        Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
                        True Christian™
                        • Nov 2007
                        • 18449

                        #12
                        Re: Calling All LOL's - Emergency Meeting!

                        OK, I don't know what's going on, but I do have to close the thread now. Sorry folks.
                        Psalm 81:10:
                        I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
                        open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.

                        Comment

                        • Daisy Mae Johnson
                          The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                          Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                          aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                          True Christian™
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 15708

                          #13
                          Re: Calling All LOL's - Emergency Meeting!

                          Originally posted by Wide-Open View Post
                          Sister Thumper, I was asked to close this thread as you probably feel bad about it. I hope that is OK with you? Let me know!
                          The nerve!!!
                          sigpic

                          Tweet me Here
                          My GODLY Bio Here

                          Comment

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