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  • #1

    News headlines you want to see

    When watching Fox News, I'm pretty sure most of us have headlines we really wish to see some day.
    1. Please add at least one headline for each post, in bold.
    2. If you need to use a context, put it in parentheses.
    3. Feel free to correct headlines by previously posters if there are spelling or grammar errors, or you find a way to make it more catchy.

    Here are mine:
    Apple under investigation by Department of Family Values
    (300-yard asteroid Apophis impact Venezuela) God smites sinners in Venezuela with fire from heaven
    NORAD sights flying horses grazing near ozone layer

    sigpicCorporal Punishment Advisor, U.S. Department of Family Values
    Cyber-bullying Instructor, Christian Commission on Human Rights
    ★ Apple CEO is gay - Important DFV security considerations
    ★ Higgs field theory disproved - Universe is a cotton field
    ★ Viagra forces man to have his penis amputated
    Tags: news, social games
  • #2
    Re: News headlines you want to see

    Obama Introduces Sharia Law
    Isa (PBUH) Returns, Commences 40-year Reign
    George H. W. Bush Finally Dead

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: News headlines you want to see

      Atheism Declared Illegal!

      Homersexurality Declared Illegal!

      U.S. Constitution Scrapped in Favor of King James Bible!
      Who Will Jesus Damn?

      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: News headlines you want to see

        5 gay couples sentenced to public stoning in California under the new Biblical laws!

        Christianity declared as the official state religion of the United States!

        George W. Bush declared as lifetime president and eternal leader of the nation after Christian Coup d'état!

        Manatee hunting declared legal!

        The White House announces final solution for atheism!

        Comment

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