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  • Harold Law
    Forum Member
    Forum Member
    • Dec 2007
    • 136

    #1

    Scared of Hunting?!

    Friends I need help and guidance on a particular matter. I was bitterly dissapointed today after finding out that my nephew is apparently too "In tune with nature" as he put it to go hunting. I thank the Lord that this conversation took place over the phone or I would have immediately strangled him to death on the spot! At this point im not sure if there is any chance of saving my nephew. My liberal no good brother injected all this nonsense into his head that animals have "Feelings" and "Feel Pain". The boy's becoming a gosh-darned sodomite, and that only leads to one place! I mean really, who would turn down pouring some buckshot into some stupid yet extremely delicious beast?

    What's worse is I caught the boy on the computer last weekend.... he was doing the absolute unthinkable...looking at that boy Ubama's latest speech through that demon spewing website Jootube or whatever it's called.

    Any advice is appreciated, Harold Law

    Go with Christ
    Ephesians 5:22-24
    22*Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23*For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24*Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78551

    #2
    Re: Scared of Hunting?!

    Sounds like the boy turned queer. Has his father searched his room for gay porn, Mario games and PETA pamphlets?
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

    Comment

    • HTannor
      America's Most Fair and Balanced Judge
      True Christian™
      • Jun 2009
      • 2612

      #3
      Re: Scared of Hunting?!

      What that boy needs is some total immersion in Testosterone Land.

      I suggest you take him by the arm and lead him to the nearest Marine Recruitment Station. (Under NO circumstances should he be allowed to even see an Air Force recruiter. They will ply him with cute little cookies and soft drinks.)

      Once in the Marines he'll become a true lover of weaponry and will quickly learn that shooting bunnies, ducks, moose, and the odd Muslim is all in a day's work for a real man.
      The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court

      "Credo elvem etiam vivere"

      Comment

      • Once was lost
        ...but now is found.
        True Christian™
        • Feb 2009
        • 490

        #4
        Re: Scared of Hunting?!

        Up here we have a right of passage for young lads like that. It takes place in the springtime on our ice floes. We give our young men an instrument called a Hakapik and most take like Ducks to water whacking young Seal pups on the head. I took 26 on my first day out at the ripe old age of fourteen. Of course no trip to the ice would even be considered before we had community prayer at the local church for a blessing of the hunt.

        Comment

        • Brother Enoch
          The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
          True Christian™
          • Jun 2008
          • 4392

          #5
          Re: Scared of Hunting?!

          Originally posted by Once was lost View Post
          Up here we have a right of passage for young lads like that. It takes place in the springtime on our ice floes. We give our young men an instrument called a Hakapik and most take like Ducks to water whacking young Seal pups on the head. I took 26 on my first day out at the ripe old age of fourteen. Of course no trip to the ice would even be considered before we had community prayer at the local church for a blessing of the hunt.
          Gotta love you Newfs!

          My ex-Eskimo wife particularly enjoys seal pup eyeballs.

          Comment

          • HTannor
            America's Most Fair and Balanced Judge
            True Christian™
            • Jun 2009
            • 2612

            #6
            Re: Scared of Hunting?!

            Excellent idea, Brother Once.

            Activities like this will certainly build up one's skills. Just look at the wrist action.

            The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court

            "Credo elvem etiam vivere"

            Comment

            • Harold Law
              Forum Member
              Forum Member
              • Dec 2007
              • 136

              #7
              Re: Scared of Hunting?!

              Excellent advice, praise god. If I could afford the tickets to Alaska i'd sent the little bastard to get me some seal jerky. For now i'll just have to be content with signing him up without his knowledge to the Marines. Nothing those boys can't take care of.
              Ephesians 5:22-24
              22*Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23*For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24*Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

              Comment

              • whopboy
                Confirmed Enemy of God
                • Jan 2010
                • 1

                #8
                Re: Scared of Hunting?!

                Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                Sounds like the boy turned queer. Has his father searched his room for gay porn, Mario games and PETA pamphlets?
                Really, are you honestly saying Mario games and PETA pamphlets are signs of homosexuality. Its ignorant people like yourself that gives religion a bad name. And I would like to hear how PETA can possibly be homosexual or in anyway bad.

                Comment

                • HTannor
                  America's Most Fair and Balanced Judge
                  True Christian™
                  • Jun 2009
                  • 2612

                  #9
                  Re: Scared of Hunting?!

                  If Pastor Ezekiel says it, then it's true.


                  As for you, nancyboy, being banned on your first post shows us how valuable your opinion is. Frankly, it would have been nice if you were banned before your first post.
                  The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court

                  "Credo elvem etiam vivere"

                  Comment

                  • Pastor Ezekiel
                    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                     
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 78551

                    #10
                    Re: Scared of Hunting?!

                    Originally posted by whopboy View Post
                    Really, are you honestly saying Mario games and PETA pamphlets are signs of homosexuality. Its ignorant people like yourself that gives religion a bad name. And I would like to hear how PETA can possibly be homosexual or in anyway bad.
                    All you had to do was to click on the links I provided.


                    Too late now. Enjoy hell.
                    Who Will Jesus Damn?

                    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                    Comment

                    • James Hutchins
                      True Christian™
                      Just a Regular Nice Guy
                       
                      • Jun 2009
                      • 29433

                      #11
                      Re: Scared of Hunting?!

                      I shoot an animal everyday. It is like crapping, something I have to do to feel regular.
                      Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                      Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                      Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                      Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                      Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                      Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                      Comment

                      • HTannor
                        America's Most Fair and Balanced Judge
                        True Christian™
                        • Jun 2009
                        • 2612

                        #12
                        Re: Scared of Hunting?!

                        Preach it, Brother James.


                        This just makes me want to break out the frying pan:

                        The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court

                        "Credo elvem etiam vivere"

                        Comment

                        • James Hutchins
                          True Christian™
                          Just a Regular Nice Guy
                           
                          • Jun 2009
                          • 29433

                          #13
                          Re: Scared of Hunting?!

                          That is so cute, Brother HT, though the cross hairs really should be up a bit for a one shot, one kill. The way that gun is aimed, the shot will merely wipe that insidious smile off of Bambi's face. That image is typical Walt Devily propoganda.
                          Remember, more than a single squeeze and you are playing with it..
                          Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                          Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                          Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                          Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                          Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                          Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                          Comment

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