[Arethusa]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

You need not worry, even though I have multiple wives I take good care of them all and give them all the attention they need. You would also most likely be my last wife, five is enough for me (I'm no King Solomon nor am I his son Rehoboam). You may be my last wife but you would not be the least among them.

With five wives I would be able to father many Soldiers for Christ. I have fathered no children yet, I feel the Lord is waiting to bless me in that way until after I marry my fifth wife to ensure the children are raised properly to be True Christians™.

Come now, I would make you a good husband and you a good wife for me and you know it deep down. My wives have read your posts and are excited you may be joining the family. I have not allowed them to read your recent posts to me as I do not want to disapoint them.

Do not deny the Will of God, dear.

How was your Christmas?

[Poetic Peter]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death



Where is Twink when we at last need him
to curb an appetite, but fast!

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

No!

Besides all that "many wives" talk put me in the mind of Mormons.

I am definately no Moron! They may practice polygamy regularly but they do so without God's blessing.

As Pastor Al said here it is fine to have multiple wives. The Bible has a number of verses showing that polygamy is fine in Jesus' eyes.

From the Old Testament:
In Exodus 21:10, a man can marry an infinite amount of women without any limits to how many he can marry.

10If he take him another wife; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish.

In 2 Samuel 5:13; 1 Chronicles 3:1-9, 14:3, King David had six wives and numerous concubines.

13And David took him more concubines and wives out of Jerusalem, after he was come from Hebron: and there were yet sons and daughters born to David.

1Now these were the sons of David, which were born unto him in Hebron; the firstborn Amnon, of Ahinoam the Jezreelitess; the second Daniel, of Abigail the Carmelitess:

2The third, Absalom the son of Maachah the daughter of Talmai king of Geshur: the fourth, Adonijah the son of Haggith:

3The fifth, Shephatiah of Abital: the sixth, Ithream by Eglah his wife.

4These six were born unto him in Hebron; and there he reigned seven years and six months: and in Jerusalem he reigned thirty and three years.

5And these were born unto him in Jerusalem; Shimea, and Shobab, and Nathan, and Solomon, four, of Bathshua the daughter of Ammiel:

6Ibhar also, and Elishama, and Eliphelet,

7And Nogah, and Nepheg, and Japhia,

8And Elishama, and Eliada, and Eliphelet, nine.

9These were all the sons of David, beside the sons of the concubines, and Tamar their sister.
-------------
3And David took more wives at Jerusalem: and David begat more sons and daughters.

In 1 Kings 11:3, King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines.

3And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart.

I have but 4 wives currently, am wanting only one more, and only a handful of concubines.

In 2 Chronicles 11:21, King Solomon's son Rehoboam had 18 wives and 60 concubines.

21And Rehoboam loved Maachah the daughter of Absalom above all his wives and his concubines: (for he took eighteen wives, and threescore concubines; and begat twenty and eight sons, and threescore daughters.)

There are a lot more verses from the Old Testament that allow polygamy, but I think that the above are sufficient enough to prove my point.

New Testament:

1Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom.

2And five of them were wise, and five were foolish.

3They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them:

4But the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.

5While the bridegroom tarried, they all slumbered and slept.

6And at midnight there was a cry made, Behold, the bridegroom cometh; go ye out to meet him.

7Then all those virgins arose, and trimmed their lamps.

8And the foolish said unto the wise, Give us of your oil; for our lamps are gone out.

9But the wise answered, saying, Not so; lest there be not enough for us and you: but go ye rather to them that sell, and buy for yourselves.

10And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came; and they that were ready went in with him to the marriage: and the door was shut.

11Afterward came also the other virgins, saying, Lord, Lord, open to us.

12But he answered and said, Verily I say unto you, I know you not.

13Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.

In this parable the bridegroom married five virgins at one time (would have been ten if the other five were not foolish).

(from http://www.quransearch.com/ntpoly.htm)


You need not worry, even though I have multiple wives I take good care of them all and give them all the attention they need. You would also most likely be my last wife, five is enough for me (I'm no King Solomon nor am I his son Rehoboam). You may be my last wife but you would not be the least among them.

With five wives I would be able to father many Soldiers for Christ. I have fathered no children yet, I feel the Lord is waiting to bless me in that way until after I marry my fifth wife to ensure the children are raised properly to be True Christians™.

Come now, I would make you a good husband and you a good wife for me and you know it deep down. My wives have read your posts and are excited you may be joining the family. I have not allowed them to read your recent posts to me as I do not want to disapoint them.

Do not deny the Will of God, dear.

[Arethusa]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

No!

Besides all that "many wives" talk put me in the mind of Mormons.

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

Quote me a Bible verse where it says Arethusa was made to marry Jesus is Lord and you've got yourself a deal. I need names specifically because I take the Bible, very, VERY literally.

ARE YOU BLIND, WOMAN?!?! Can you not see that you were meant for me? Let me fly you here for a visit so you can get to know me in person. Then you can make your decision.

This is a chance to visit Jesus' Favorite Town, Freehold, and His Favorite Church, Landover Baptist. What True Christian™ passes up a chance like that? The signs are all there, dear. Everybody else sees them, why can't you?

All women need a man to lead them and I am the man for you. Come to Freehold, I promise you will never want to leave.

[Arethusa]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

Quote me a Bible verse where it says Arethusa was made to marry Jesus is Lord and you've got yourself a deal. I need names specifically because I take the Bible, very, VERY literally.

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

GLORY!

Oh Praise the LORD! That was a beautiful and heartfelt PROPOSAL Brother JIL.

<wipes tears from my eyes>

I would like to offer my services as a True Christian™ Wedding Planner.

Oh, it's going to be so LOVELY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't wait!!!!!!!!!!

Excited, Sister Thumper

Thank you so very much, Sister BTB. I appreciate the offer but Arethusa has to also agree.

Praise Jesus!
Congratulations you two.


I'm sure you will make a lovely wife, Arethusa.
There is no need to play "hard to get", nor deny that you want to fullfill your womanly duties to cook and produce Christian soldiers.
There is no need to act like you doesn't deserve such an honor.

Jesus knows you do, or He wouldn't have granted it to you.
Glory!

Thank you, Brother SS.

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. There's nothing to get excited about, and I won't need a wedding planner because I will be a True Christian and meet a Godly man in-person, rather than a (blessed) stranger on the eevil internet!

Errr..glory!

Stranger? How can I be a mere stranger? We are True Christians™ and therefore we are all members of Jesus' family.

I can understand being hesitant about this, marriage is a big step for someone to make. It is something to take seriously. Even though I already have four wives and a few concubines I still get nervous about the prospect of marrying someone, especially someone as Goldy and beautiful as you. Don't worry about me being unable to pay you the attention you need, I always make quality time for all my wives.

You don't have to be nervous about meeting my wives. They are wonderful ladies and love the idea of having you as a sister-wife.

Why don't I fly you here to my house in Freehold so you can get to know me and my family in person? Don't say no until you get to know me better. I doubt you will say no though as I feel it is God's will we marry.

The Internet is not all evil. Yes, there is a lot of evil on the Internet but there are also islands of rightousness. Landover is one of these islands.

If you deny the will of Jesus by not marrying the man He has appointed for you..
Well, let's just say that Jesus doesn't like having His will denied!!
And that He, through the Holy Spirit, may move a Godly man like myself to meet up with you "in-person" and show you just how displeased He is.

And know that you can NEVER be a True Christian Woman if you deny the will of Jesus.
It requires TOTAL obedience to Jesus, AT ALL TIMES.
GLORY!

AMEN! One of the first things I plan to do after our wedding is to teach her how to submit to Jesus (and in doing so, me) in all things.

3But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God...

8For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man.
9Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.

The above verses tell us that women must listen and be submissive to men.

34Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law.

The above verse tell us women should be silent in church and to be obedient.

11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.
12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.

These verses tell us women are to learn in silence and not teach. It is also a reminder that Eve was the one who was deceived, not Adam, and why women are punished still today by bleeding from there private place for a week every month and through painful child birth.

22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

These verses show a wife must always be submissive to her husband.

Arethusa, True Christians™ ALWAYS follow the ENTIRE Bible. If you are really a True Christian™ you will do as you are told.

[SalvationSeeker]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. There's nothing to get excited about, and I won't need a wedding planner because I will be a True Christian and meet a Godly man in-person, rather than a (blessed) stranger on the eevil internet!

Errr..glory!

If you deny the will of Jesus by not marrying the man He has appointed for you..
Well, let's just say that Jesus doesn't like having His will denied!!
And that He, through the Holy Spirit, may move a Godly man like myself to meet up with you "in-person" and show you just how displeased He is.

And know that you can NEVER be a True Christian Woman if you deny the will of Jesus.
It requires TOTAL obedience to Jesus, AT ALL TIMES.
GLORY!

[Arethusa]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. There's nothing to get excited about, and I won't need a wedding planner because I will be a True Christian and meet a Godly man in-person, rather than a (blessed) stranger on the eevil internet!

Errr..glory!

[SalvationSeeker]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

Praise Jesus!
Congratulations you two.


I'm sure you will make a lovely wife, Arethusa.
There is no need to play "hard to get", nor deny that you want to fullfill your womanly duties to cook and produce Christian soldiers.
There is no need to act like you doesn't deserve such an honor.

Jesus knows you do, or He wouldn't have granted it to you.
Glory!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

What you feel is of no consequence. What matters is what God wants and HE wants you to find a True Christian™ to be your husband.

GLORY!

Oh Praise the LORD! That was a beautiful and heartfelt PROPOSAL Brother JIL.

<wipes tears from my eyes>

I would like to offer my services as a True Christian™ Wedding Planner.

Oh, it's going to be so LOVELY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't wait!!!!!!!!!!

Excited, Sister Thumper

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

Jesus is Lord I already told you how I felt about that. There's no need to bring it back up now. God bless you.

What you feel is of no consequence. What matters is what God wants and HE wants you to find a True Christian™ to be your husband.

[Arethusa]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

Young lady! You go and wash your mouth out with SOAP! And I mean RIGHT NOW!!

We are all 100% behind our Godly president GWB, who was hand-chosen by Jesus Himself to lead our nation into victory against the islamofascists led by Saddam Bin Laden! God Bless America!! Stay the course!!

Can I just use mouthwash while thinking about Bush and Jesus?

Jesus is Lord I already told you how I felt about that. There's no need to bring it back up now. God bless you.

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

Young lady! You go and wash your mouth out with SOAP! And I mean RIGHT NOW!!

We are all 100% behind our Godly president GWB, who was hand-chosen by Jesus Himself to lead our nation into victory against the islamofascists led by Saddam Bin Laden! God Bless America!! Stay the course!!

Pastor, it is quite evident Arethusa needs a True Christian™ man to do her thinking for her.

Arethusa, my offer is still open. You need a man to lead your life and I am willing to be that man.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Pray for Republican Victory and Senator Johnson's Death

I love soldiers, no doubt about that. If anyone is undermining the troops it's those evil Republicans who want the army to make a graceful exit!

Young lady! You go and wash your mouth out with SOAP! And I mean RIGHT NOW!!

We are all 100% behind our Godly president GWB, who was hand-chosen by Jesus Himself to lead our nation into victory against the islamofascists led by Saddam Bin Laden! God Bless America!! Stay the course!!