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  • #1

    Please pray for the pizza guy

    His name, I believe, was Robert. Well, I lied. Forgive me. I didn't ask his name. He arrived thirty-nine minutes after I hung up the phone, ending the call with the nice young lady who assured me that the tasty bastard of a pie I ordered would be waiting outside my front door in thirty-FIVE minutes. I would have paid anyway, but I'm a firm believer in ethics, including the work kind. I refused to pay for the pizza, and needless to say, refused to tip the boy who brought it four minutes late. I hope they won't be too hard on him. Oh, I also spoke with his manager, who I have thoroughly convinced that the boy reeked of questionable substances! I know that lying is frowned upon, but I think that allowing the boy to get less punishment than he deserved would be a much heavier load on my conscience in the long run. Again, though, I hope they aren't TOO hard on him. Pray, my friends, if you've ever brought consequences on yourself that you thought you could handle, only to find out that the bite you took came from the dinner of a seriously sadistic sombitch.

    I'll be getting back to my [four minutes colder than I expected, plus the time it took me to type this compassionate piece of work up] pizza. I'll be eating the whole thing. Myself.
    A fool's lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes. Proverbs 18:6
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  • #2
    Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

    Originally posted by Krustifer View Post
    His name, I believe, was Robert. Well, I lied.
    Admitting that you are a vile sinner, not worthy of living, is the first step toward Salvation. Congratulations, Krustifier, you have taken your first step toward receiving the love of Jesus Christ into your heart.

    Pour out thy fury upon the heathen that know thee not, and upon the families that call not on thy name.... Jeremiah 10:25

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

      Admitting that you are a vile sinner, not worthy of living, is the first step toward Salvation. Congratulations, Krustifier, you have taken your first step toward receiving the love of Jesus Christ into your heart.
      Much thanks for your support, Ahimaaz, but the point of this thread was not to gain praise from anyone, but to request help in persuading sweet Jesus to spare the young one from any fatal punishment, and to strike down any wrinkly, old, jaded heart of a supervisor who tries to string the poor boy up by his little zit-ridden, probably hairless testicles. My salvation is an entirely different subject, which I'd love to discuss with you in another thread, far away from where I left my request for help on another depraved individual's behalf. I know I must work my way up the ladder to God's favor, which probably involves some heavy spending, which means I am sadly out of luck for now. You see, it wasn't time that screwed the lad, but these baneful fingers that I wear. I changed the time on the clock, for I had no money to offer for the meal they supplied me. I suppose you've caught me in another lie, by doing none other than letting me shoot my mouth off. I really need help. I understand, though, that Paypal is vulnerable to no scam that this small, godless brain of mine can think up. I'm afraid I'll have to save my rebirth and redemption for a later date.
      A fool's lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes. Proverbs 18:6

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      • #4
        Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

        Originally posted by Krustifool View Post
        I also spoke with his manager, who I have thoroughly convinced that the boy reeked of questionable substances!
        From what I remember from filmgoing in my secular life pre-Landover™, many pizza delivery boys also appear in adult films.

        Those drugs are probably to combat the pain he feels in that exploitive, depraved lifestyle.

        I will pray for him.

        Comment

        • #5
          Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

          Dear lord in heaven,

          in this hour of trying need I pray that you spare the wrath due to this pizza delivery boy, and show comfort upon Krustifool.

          In Jesus' name I pray

          Amen.

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

            Lord, having read KrustyTool's impassioned posts, I pray that you spare the unfortunate victim of her abuses, the pizza boy, from the unemployment line . . . and that you visit Your Holy Wrath upon her for bearing false witness against the pizza boy, who is already a pathetic loser reduced to such work as delivering pizzas and certainly not deserving of such torment at the hands of Unsaved Trash!
            Bible boring? Nonsense!
            Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
            You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

              Originally posted by Krustifool View Post
              His name, I believe, was Robert. Well, I lied. Forgive me. I didn't ask his name. He arrived thirty-nine minutes after I hung up the phone, ending the call with the nice young lady who assured me that the tasty bastard of a pie I ordered would be waiting outside my front door in thirty-FIVE minutes. I would have paid anyway, but I'm a firm believer in ethics, including the work kind. I refused to pay for the pizza, and needless to say, refused to tip the boy who brought it four minutes late. I hope they won't be too hard on him. Oh, I also spoke with his manager, who I have thoroughly convinced that the boy reeked of questionable substances! I know that lying is frowned upon, but I think that allowing the boy to get less punishment than he deserved would be a much heavier load on my conscience in the long run. Again, though, I hope they aren't TOO hard on him. Pray, my friends, if you've ever brought consequences on yourself that you thought you could handle, only to find out that the bite you took came from the dinner of a seriously sadistic sombitch.

              I'll be getting back to my [four minutes colder than I expected, plus the time it took me to type this compassionate piece of work up] pizza. I'll be eating the whole thing. Myself.

              Maybe a little harsh. How did he take it?

              Comment

              • #8
                Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

                I'll add him to this week's prayer list at my church.
                If humans evolved from monkeys, why are there still monkeys?

                Comment

                • #9
                  Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

                  I'm praying for you since you are so rude that you refused to pay for a pizza that was less than five minutes late.


                  I would have thrown that pizza in your face for that

                  LOOSEN UP

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

                    Originally posted by openmind View Post
                    I'm praying for you since you are so rude that you refused to pay for a pizza that was less than five minutes late.


                    I would have thrown that pizza in your face for that

                    LOOSEN UP
                    Loosen up????
                    Spoken like a Homosexual!!!
                    You make me sick!
                    Late is late. God and Jesus don't make allowances for "almost" and neither should we!
                    Matthew:
                    5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                    5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                    10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                    10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                    sigpic

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

                      Isn't your life incredibly boring being so uptight and preachy all the time?

                      I mean really, wouldn't you just like to kick off your shoes, smile & appreciate all the great things on this earth? This whole community is full of people who seem to get off an hating anything and everything. Wouldn't the christian response to a four-minute late pizza be "No big deal, have a blessed day!" Or something to that effect?

                      I would hate to be you.

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

                        Originally posted by openmind View Post
                        Isn't your life incredibly boring being so uptight and preachy all the time?

                        I mean really, wouldn't you just like to kick off your shoes, smile & appreciate all the great things on this earth? This whole community is full of people who seem to get off an hating anything and everything. Wouldn't the christian response to a four-minute late pizza be "No big deal, have a blessed day!" Or something to that effect?

                        I would hate to be you.
                        No, you'll wish you were me when you're in Hell and I'm in Heaven laughing at you.
                        Matthew:
                        5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                        5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                        10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                        10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                        sigpic

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

                          I felt kind of bad for the Pizza guy after reading all the accusations about him, so I went online and ordered him a flashlight so that he can see the numbers of the houses easier to serve his customers.

                          I choose this model:

                          Streamlight 68244 4AA Propolymer Luxeon Flashlight with White LED, Yellow body
                          Buy new: $29.89
                          I'm pretty sure he'll like it. This should improve his delivery time.
                          Last edited by Nobar King; 01-12-2009, 12:53 AM.
                          May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

                            ... what is your point Nobar??

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Re: Please pray for the pizza guy

                              I'm close to giving you an infraction for comma abuse and for questioning the generosity of a True Christian. You are given one chance to apologize.
                              May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

                              Comment

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