[Brother Enoch]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Good Brother Enoch I do hope the semi arrived to day with the cabin and the weapons. I am sorry that my idiot son did not know how to run a chain saw, not a lot of need for them in New York City , he will pick it up eventually.

Right on time. All the materials are stored on the small 20 acre plot you purchased and I'll slap that puppy up on the weekend. Actually Saturday should be all it'll take if I can teach your boy how to use a hammer before now and then.

The weapons are quite awe inspiring nothing like them has been seen in this part of the world before. I'll have to spend a few days familiarizing myself with the instruction manuals sent up along with them. I appreciate that, btw, I know most Americans don't need them. Very thoughtful of you.

I have looked at my calendar and May 29 seems like a good date. Do you think it will be alright if I invite all our Brothers and sisters from our church? If so what are the accommodations like?

May 29 is perfect! I'm about 10 miles away from the finest seasonal resort on Cape Breton Island, the Keltic Lodge.

Opening date for our 2010 season is June 5th

Situated high on a cliff surrounded by the Atlantic Ocean and a view of majestic Cape Smokey rising out of the sea, Keltic Lodge Resort and Spa has been welcoming guests to Cape Breton Island’s most majestic property since July 1940 . Comfortable Cape Breton accommodations are offered in the historic Main Lodge, the Inn at Keltic and in cozy two or four-bedroom cottages with fireplaces and verandas, totaling 105 guestrooms.

Recreation facilities include on or in the surrounding area range from a heated outdoor pool, nearby ocean beach Ingonish Beach, hiking wilderness trails, lawn games, whale watching, Aveda Spa, and boat cruises. Adjacent to the resort is a highlight of Cape Breton golf, the 18 hole championship Highlands Links Golf Course, ranked by Score Golf Magazine as Atlantic Canada's Top Public Course in 2009. The course, rich in the Scottish tradition, has been restored to Stanley Thompson's magnificent original design.

Fine dining and award winning cuisine are offered in our two Cape Breton restaurants. The Purple Thistle Breakfast Room overlooks the Atlantic Ocean. The Àrdan Restaurant and Bar welcomes guests for a casual, comfortable dining experience and traditional Maritime menu. Our bar features nightly entertainment and a light pub style

May 29 is a week before their yearly opening date (June 5), so they've taken no reservations for that period. The owner is a good friend and he was happy to agree to opening the Lodge two weeks early for wedding guests and the guest's staff. The lodge has 105 separate accommodations, including luxury and presidential suites and self-contained cabins which will easily hold 500+ people in all. Best of all, absolutely free of charge!

The owner is a good man, who has taken a kindly interest in our family, particularly my retarded 14 year old half-eskimo son. He often takes him to the Lodge for sleepovers, and off on camping trips. I think he's a bit lonely, he seems to be willing to help us in whatever way we ask as long as he can spend some time with the boy. I feel kind of sorry for him. Who says all Catholics are bad?

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Brother James, I hesitate to mention this (it's not a huge deal), but I need to know how to properly explain things to your idiot son. And should I buy him a helmet in case he harms himself?

I told him clearly what land he's supposed to clear for his own use, the 100 acre plot. And I thought it would be hard for him to go outside the boundaries since it's all undeveloped boreal forest, all spruce and fir, surrounded by developed land. But he cut along the bottom third of his plot, going east, until he reached my apple orchard. And he continued east, through the apple orchard taking down a third of the trees, about 1500 of them. Then he reached the municipal road. That's where I stopped him. After he had taken down his fourteenth utility pole.

Like I said, not a big deal, I produce way more apples than I need. And those trees will grow back. The utility poles aren't a big problem either, Nova Scotia Power and I have had an understanding for quite some time now. They mine coal under my property to fire their power plants, and in exchange they fully power my home and all outbuildings without charge, and have a contract do so in perpetuity. (It pays to have the mineral rights to your land. ). A few poles won't bother them any.

But it's your son I'm worried about. I wouldn't like to see him harm himself, my daughter is already growing very fond of him. I worry what would have happened to him had he come in contact with the live wires that were jumping across the ground like horny snakes. He was poking at one with the chainsaw when I stopped him.

The only thing I can think of for him is constant supervision, but I don't have the time for that. It's just not practical. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

=Brother Enoch;507952]

Brother James, I hesitate to mention this (it's not a huge deal), but I need to know how to properly explain things to your idiot son. And should I buy him a helmet in case he harms himself?

Brother Enoch, Yes to the helmet. I just fed- ex ed 2 of them next day air.The helmets should have been packed by his Idiot mother! I find that when you are talking to him look at his eyes if they stray you have lost him. A swift kick in the back end usually returns his attention to you.

I told him clearly what land he's supposed to clear for his own use, the 100 acre plot. And I thought it would be hard for him to go outside the boundaries since it's all undeveloped boreal forest, all spruce and fir, surrounded by developed land. But he cut along the bottom third of his plot, going east, until he reached my apple orchard. And he continued east, through the apple orchard taking down a third of the trees, about 1500 of them.

The idiot son of mine was raised in New York city, a tree is a tree to him. I am so very sorry for the loss of the apple trees. I have contacted a nursery in your area and they will be in contact with you. I have instructed them to replace each tree with a like tree in the same size range. They have my credit card information. They will take care of the stump removal and replanting to your specifications.
On to the subject of stump removal. On the trees that the Idiot should have cut down and has cut down how will the stumps be removed? Digging or blasting with dynamite? If it is to be blasting I must caution you to stay far away from the idiot.

Then he reached the municipal road. That's where I stopped him. After he had taken down his fourteenth utility pole.

I am not real happy now, even he should know the difference between a damn utility pole and a tree. Upon completion of this post I am punching his mother in the mouth. I know he could not have come from my loins! The more I think about it, she was helping her uncle run a tavern during her pregnancy with the idiot. If she was hitting the booze, Oh heck I am still punching her out.

The utility poles aren't a big problem either, Nova Scotia Power and I have had an understanding for quite some time now. They mine coal under my property to fire their power plants, and in exchange they fully power my home and all outbuildings without charge, and have a contract do so in perpetuity. (It pays to have the mineral rights to your land. ). A few poles won't bother them any.

I do not want you to have any trouble with the utility company, I looked up the phone number and I will reimburse them for the expense.

I can tell you this, I had purchased a 6 week vacation to the islands of Hawaii, it was to be most excellent, cruse there and back first class air fare. 4 weeks on the beach at the best motel. All meals drinks all paid for. It was going to be a second honeymoon for my wife and I. When we come up for the wedding I am turning the trip over to you and your wife. My wife and I will say at your home and take care of your kids, well she will take care of them.You will have one year to complete the vacation. I am thinking the dead of winter.

But it's your son I'm worried about. I wouldn't like to see him harm himself, my daughter is already growing very fond of him. I worry what would have happened to him had he come in contact with the live wires that were jumping across the ground like horny snakes. He was poking at one with the chainsaw when I stopped him.

Brother what would you do if he where your son? Think about it and do it! If it requires a beating you have my permission. After all in a month he will be your son too.
May be a shock would set his mind right, or at least he wont do it again .

The only thing I can think of for him is constant supervision, but I don't have the time for that. It's just not practical. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

Are there any qualified lumber jacks in the area, I will pick up the tab, in fact offer them 3 or4 times their normal pay, room and lodging and all meals with an open bar tab.
I know you are very busy at this time of the year I contacted a farm implement retailer in your area and purchased these for you and my idiot son.
I purchased a large tractor and a sixteen bottom plow and a corn combine. I assumed you planted corn but if not change the equipment to suit your needs. I hope that this will free up some time so you will have little extra time to beat some sense in to the boy. The new equipment is paid for already, just have it delivered at your conveniences. If you see any thing else that you need to make your life easier just put it on my tab. I have also arranged to have a 2000 gallon diesel fuel tank to be installed on your property, and filled. Just let me know what else is needed and its yours.
Now you must excuse me its late and I have to find his mother.

P.S. go to the local Ford dealer ship. There is a brand new F350 super duty pick up truck, told them red but feel free to change the color. I also had them put in an ez rider rifle rack. You might find it a good place for the 30 cal Winchesters.


I do hope these small gifts some how make up for my idiot son. Just remember treat him as you would your own son. All my best wishes James

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

=Brother Enoch;507952]

The idiot son of mine was raised in New York city, a tree is a tree to him. I am so very sorry for the loss of the apple trees. I have contacted a nursery in your area and they will be in contact with you. I have instructed them to replace each tree with a like tree in the same size range. They have my credit card information. They will take care of the stump removal and replanting to your specifications.

I figured as much. While the difference between an evergreen and a dormant leafless deciduous tree is apparent to most, city folk do need this explained to them. And they also need top have the difference between a living tree and a wooden utility pole that used to be a tree explained. This is entirely my fault for making assumptions. On the plus side we have an excellent supply now of apple hardwood for the fireplaces next winter, so it's not a total loss .

On to the subject of stump removal. On the trees that the Idiot should have cut down and has cut down how will the stumps be removed? Digging or blasting with dynamite? If it is to be blasting I must caution you to stay far away from the idiot.

No worries there, I intend to let them decompose where they are, under 4 feet of new topsoil.. I have an agreement with a strip mine that is opening soon on the other side of the island to cart away their topsoil without charge to them. I'll dump it right on your son's acreage, mixed with top quality compost obtained for next to nothing from Halifax's Sewage Treatment Facility. Apparently people are reluctant to purchase it for some reason and they have more than they know what to do with. Manure is manure. What difference if it's cow manure or human manure? Nutrients are nutrients.

I am not real happy now, even he should know the difference between a damn utility pole and a tree. Upon completion of this post I am punching his mother in the mouth. I know he could not have come from my loins! The more I think about it, she was helping her uncle run a tavern during her pregnancy with the idiot. If she was hitting the booze, Oh heck I am still punching her out.

It was probably the booze, that was what damaged my first two before I figured out what was going on and put a firm stop to it. The good news there is the damage caused by Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is not passed on to the next generation. The children of your son and my daughter will probably be smarter than either of them at age 6.

I'll be keeping an eye on the grandkids, of course, and once they reach 5 I think they should perhaps be sent to Freehold for a proper education, away from their parents. I'm sure you can watch over them at that time. Lot's of time to work that out, of course.

I do not want you to have any trouble with the utility company, I looked up the phone number and I will reimburse them for the expense.

Really not necessary, James, I spoke with them and there's no problem. You see, they think they have a good deal with me letting them mine the coals seams beneath my holdings without charge. They agreed in return to supply my electricity, and that of my descendants on this property and any adjoining property in perpetuity. They think they have put one over on me and want to keep me happy. God forbid I ever consult a lawyer and he tells that I've been scr*wed by the big bad utility company. They don't realize what the birth rate of True Christians(tm) is. Nor do they realize we congregate together, and expand ever outward. I expect it will be only one generation before they realize their error. When my initial holdings and my descendants adjoining holdings really begin to drain their resources, long after the coal is gone and they can't back out.

I can tell you this, I had purchased a 6 week vacation to the islands of Hawaii, it was to be most excellent, cruse there and back first class air fare. 4 weeks on the beach at the best motel. All meals drinks all paid for. It was going to be a second honeymoon for my wife and I. When we come up for the wedding I am turning the trip over to you and your wife. My wife and I will say at your home and take care of your kids, well she will take care of them.You will have one year to complete the vacation. I am thinking the dead of winter.

Brother James, I truly appreciate that offer. Really. But honestly, after the years you and your wife have had to deal with your idiot son, you deserve the break. You've certainly earned it. Besides, knowledge of such places as Hawaii and such things as 'room service' are things I want to keep from my wife. She's content now with her cooking, cleaning and laundry duties, and actually feels quite blessed that her older daughters are taking some of these chores off her plate allowing her more time to devote to her favorite hobby. Sitting on the sofa and growing larger. She's a great comfort next to me in bed on cold winter nights.

Brother what would you do if he where your son? Think about it and do it! If it requires a beating you have my permission. After all in a month he will be your son too.
May be a shock would set his mind right, or at least he wont do it again .

He's not actually that bad. Remember I do have a retarded 14 year old half-eskimo son. By comparison, your son is a genius. A little patience is all I need, and I've learned that trait having a family full of eskimos. So, no worries, he's not even close to the dumbest one I have to deal with.

I know you are very busy at this time of the year I contacted a farm implement retailer in your area and purchased these for you and my idiot son.
I purchased a large tractor and a sixteen bottom plow and a corn combine. I assumed you planted corn but if not change the equipment to suit your needs. I hope that this will free up some time so you will have little extra time to beat some sense in to the boy. The new equipment is paid for already, just have it delivered at your conveniences. If you see any thing else that you need to make your life easier just put it on my tab. I have also arranged to have a 2000 gallon diesel fuel tank to be installed on your property, and filled. Just let me know what else is needed and its yours.
Now you must excuse me its late and I have to find his mother.

Very nice, and that will cut down on the number of migrant mexican laborers I need to employ, many thanks!

P.S. go to the local Ford dealer ship. There is a brand new F350 super duty pick up truck, told them red but feel free to change the color. I also had them put in an ez rider rifle rack. You might find it a good place for the 30 cal Winchesters.

That's a beaut! Normally I'm a Dodge man, but for that lovely lady I can make an exception! Thanks!

I do hope these small gifts some how make up for my idiot son. Just remember treat him as you would your own son. All my best wishes James

Please, there are no need for further gifts. I appreciate all you've done, but your boy will be a great help in years to come. And I have time to instruct him, especially with the new farm a machinery you have provided.

I look forward to meeting the rest of your family next month Brother, God Bless.

Enoch

[nmatt89]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Not wrong. Of course you should be careful with where you put your mouth, but if you kiss the lips, and the hands, why not? It is a way of showing affection.

[Jocelyn Carolyn]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

@nmatt89 why do you want to get AIDS?

[James Dewitt]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Not wrong. Of course you should be careful with where you put your mouth, but if you kiss the lips, and the hands, why not? It is a way of showing affection.

well, well do you often kiss a mans penis? Are you a homersexural by chance?

[Sister Kitty]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

well, well do you often kiss a mans penis? Are you a homersexural by chance?

I am guessing it is by choice.

[TheLordSavedMe]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Not wrong. Of course you should be careful with where you put your mouth, but if you kiss the lips, and the hands, why not? It is a way of showing affection.

EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

That's where PEE comes out!

There is no NO WAY I will ever do that! I'd probably barf anyways!


Tammi


PS- I'm sorry I posted here, but that is just sooooooooo gross! I had to say something!

[Dynastik]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

A dilemma for sure.


Interracial sex is blasphemy (gross too).

Im sorry why is it bad?, didnt King Solomon Have a black wife?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Im sorry why is it bad?, didnt King Solomon Have a black wife?

God hates miscegenation. Show me a man who thinks race-mixing is not an abomination unto God, and I'll show you a man who hasn't read Ezra 9-10.

Ezra 10:3 Now therefore let us make a covenant with our God to put away all the wives, and such as are born of them, according to the counsel of my lord, and of those that tremble at the commandment of our God; and let it be done according to the law.

If you have a dark-skinned wife and a bunch of little half-breed mongrels running around, the way to get right with God is to just abandon them. That's Godly advice straight from the Bible. Your marriage doesn't count anyway and your children are bastards as far as God is concerned. Shout Glory!





Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

[Kolonol]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Wow!! You beat your son? Well you know that is considered Domestic violence...that will sit fine with the police (already reported) and also just so you know, AIDS while still considered a problem is very hard to even be proven to exist...no one has ever seen the AIDS virus, and it seems people who do not take the AIDS medication do not die from AIDS....just saying, I figure you won't believe it because it isn't in the bible as the bible hadn't been written yet...oops....lack of foresight there as the bible was not written by god...OH!!! Shock there ain't it? The bible was written by people, and God told those individuals what they should write about, which also accounts for inconsistancies such as rebellion being good and then it being bad...yes it is in there, open your eyes. IT EVEN SAYS I AM RIGHT IN MANY PLACES!!! And NO! I will NOT quote it because you need to learn to look things up for yourselves...I am not your babysitter....just because your son screws up from time to time does NOT mean he is an idiot. It means he was not taught correctly, and that shows that whether you are the father or not it is YOUR FAULT! So the one that is the fool is the one doing the accusing as is typical. YOU are responsible for teaching him, YOU are responsible for explaining WHY it is wrong, and most of all YOU are the example for which your children learn from. So man up and take the blame that rightly belongs to you....are you going to stand before God and give him excuses as to why these things happened and blame it on someone else? Did George W. Bush make him do it? NO! YOU ARE NOT OBAMA!!! So act like a man or cut your own privates off, because they do you know good.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Wow!! You beat your son? Well you know that is considered Domestic violence...that will sit fine with the police (already reported) and also just so you know, AIDS while still considered a problem is very hard to even be proven to exist...no one has ever seen the AIDS virus, and it seems people who do not take the AIDS medication do not die from AIDS....just saying, I figure you won't believe it because it isn't in the bible as the bible hadn't been written yet...oops....lack of foresight there as the bible was not written by god...OH!!! Shock there ain't it? The bible was written by people, and God told those individuals what they should write about, which also accounts for inconsistancies such as rebellion being good and then it being bad...yes it is in there, open your eyes. IT EVEN SAYS I AM RIGHT IN MANY PLACES!!! And NO! I will NOT quote it because you need to learn to look things up for yourselves...I am not your babysitter....just because your son screws up from time to time does NOT mean he is an idiot. It means he was not taught correctly, and that shows that whether you are the father or not it is YOUR FAULT! So the one that is the fool is the one doing the accusing as is typical. YOU are responsible for teaching him, YOU are responsible for explaining WHY it is wrong, and most of all YOU are the example for which your children learn from. So man up and take the blame that rightly belongs to you....are you going to stand before God and give him excuses as to why these things happened and blame it on someone else? Did George W. Bush make him do it? NO! YOU ARE NOT OBAMA!!! So act like a man or cut your own privates off, because they do you know good.

Are you on crack or something?

[Kolonol]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

crack? no I am not on crack I am in reality, which you clearly are NOT! I have reported him to the police, and will not back down upon that. The law is the law, and you can not beat people or stone people or cause pain to another person (please visit the US legal document archives for references, I believe they are free to view for every Christian or not on Google) It is ILLEGAL!! Plain and simple and while I do not particularly like our government I do not hold judgment to say that it is completely bad. Maybe you should read the laws of our nation (as much as I hate to share this nation with the likes of people such as this) and yes I see my infraction or whatever the hell you call it, you will yell regardless of what is said, so I don't worry...(and yes I know this will bring another one) as for debate, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK RELIGION IS!!!! Your goal, which should be in the bible to is to bring people to Christianity not blow them out of the water and then stab them for flying because you think they are a witch. (or a homo or a human for that matter) I'm sorry but you took a wrong turn along the road to reality somewhere....I have no clue where but somewhere, because you are so far out in Lala land that there is no hope of finding your way back. Good day, and it may take a while but, Mr. James Dewitt, look for a man in a black and blue uniform with pretty lights on his car to visit your house with pretty silver bracelets for your wrists....Homo? it will sure look like it.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

crack? no I am not on crack I am in reality, which you clearly are NOT! I have reported him to the police, and will not back down upon that. The law is the law, and you can not beat people or stone people or cause pain to another person (please visit the US legal document archives for references, I believe they are free to view for every Christian or not on Google) It is ILLEGAL!! Plain and simple and while I do not particularly like our government I do not hold judgment to say that it is completely bad. Maybe you should read the laws of our nation (as much as I hate to share this nation with the likes of people such as this) and yes I see my infraction or whatever the hell you call it, you will yell regardless of what is said, so I don't worry...(and yes I know this will bring another one) as for debate, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK RELIGION IS!!!! Your goal, which should be in the bible to is to bring people to Christianity not blow them out of the water and then stab them for flying because you think they are a witch. (or a homo or a human for that matter) I'm sorry but you took a wrong turn along the road to reality somewhere....I have no clue where but somewhere, because you are so far out in Lala land that there is no hope of finding your way back. Good day, and it may take a while but, Mr. James Dewitt, look for a man in a black and blue uniform with pretty lights on his car to visit your house with pretty silver bracelets for your wrists....Homo? it will sure look like it.

So let me get this straight: You called the local police in your hometown and reported us for what? Practicing Christianity as the Bible commands?