I had an erection in church

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: I had an erection in church

Brother Nobar, was that you?

I saw a video on YouTube of an older gentleman wrestling with something in his pants while at church, but his face wasn't visible.

They've since taken it down.

[Ofc. Don W. Richards]

Re: I had an erection in church

My father didn't allow me to read what is in this thread but he told me to say that I am no longer allowed to sit on Nobar's lap and listen to his stories. This makes me a little sad, since his stories are very big and always give me a warm and fuzzy feeling inside.

OUT!

[Brad Crassley]

Re: I had an erection in church

I was preaching on the Song of Solomon, usually a real crowd pleaser. My sermons often produce erections in healthy Christian men.

Thats such a sex aspiring book of the Bible.

[Felicity]

Re: I had an erection in church

My father didn't allow me to read what is in this thread but he told me to say that I am no longer allowed to sit on Nobar's lap and listen to his stories. This makes me a little sad, since his stories are very big and always give me a warm and fuzzy feeling inside.

[Robert Jones]

Re: I had an erection in church

I was preaching on the Song of Solomon, usually a real crowd pleaser. My sermons often produce erections in healthy Christian men.

Indeed, the Song of Solomon definitely has that effect on a person. I oftentimes feel a stirring in my loins whilst I read. I'm certain that God means for this to happen, I believe it's the Holy Spirit physically moving in me since I have no control over "the rising of the sun unto the going down of the same," but! "the LORD's name is to be praised." I'd suggest to be more prepared when you know Pastor Ezekiel will be preaching on the Song of Solomon. As a fellow man, I know nothing can stop the erection during the sermon, it's just not possible. I do sometimes intentionally keep my Bible opened on my lap during the service, and then if the erection is still there at the end of the service, I just fold my suit coat over my arm so that it covers the front of me. It doesn't have to be embarrassing. I'm certainly surprised that you managed to fall asleep during the sermon. I felt the Holy Spirit moving through me from the moment I saw the bulletin with Pastor Ezekiel's sermon title.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I had an erection in church

Was Pastor Zeke's sermon that boring?

I was preaching on the Song of Solomon, usually a real crowd pleaser. My sermons often produce erections in healthy Christian men.

[Bob4God]

Re: I had an erection in church

I noticed you fidgeting with something, but I couldn't tell what. I assumed it was a church bulletin or hymnal.

I'm sorry to find out that it was indeed an erection, and I will pray that GOD helps you overcome the temptation to have bodily functions in church.

The concern here is not only that you had an erection, but that you fell asleep to begin with. Was Pastor Zeke's sermon that boring?

[Nobar King]

Re: I had an erection in church

It's just not the image that I want to portray when I'm at church.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I had an erection in church

I noticed it from up in my pulpit, brother, but wasn't going to say anything about it. Very impressive by the way.

It must have been embarrassing to have your erection seen by thousands on the church Jumbo tron(c).

[Nobar King]

Brothers, I am ashamed at what happened to me last Sunday at Church. I've had a few days to think about it, and I'm ready to admit it and move on.

It was a particularly warm morning and listening to the soothing sound of the pastor's voice caused me to nod-off a little. That is when I noticed the erection, and it woke me straight up. I don't know if anyone noticed me un-tuck my shirt and spread it over my lap.

I'm an old man, at this point, and I'm always glad to have a sign that my plumbing is still working, but just not during church! I was so embarrassed that my tallywhacker wouldn't behave. It was an award winning boner, too. It lasted for at least ten minutes, and I was hoping that it would go away before the service ended.

I tried to take my mind off of it by removing some gum off of the back of the pew in front of me. It was gone by the time I was done rubbing it off.

How will I know if this is going to happen again? What should I do to prevent this?