[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

This blatant brainwashing of our children needs to end! These... these... creatures are damning our CHILDREN to HELL!
WE MUST END THIS OPPRESSION OF CHRISTIAN VALUES, the True™ ones, NOW!!!

I quite agree with you. The question is, how do you propose to do this? How do you contribute to True Christian(tm) values in your home, in your neighborhood, and in your community at large? What successes have you had? What have you learned from your failures? I ask because I find it more helpful to be productive than to simply rant angrily.

[PeterJH79]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

so if playing fortnite sends me to hell, how can I get to heaven?

[Elmer G. White]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

so if playing fortnite sends me to hell, how can I get to heaven?

Dear sinner, it is simple but requires hard work.

Ecclesiastes 12:13
Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

so if playing fortnite sends me to hell, how can I get to heaven?

Are you retarded? By not playing Fortnite Battle Royale of course. Duh!

James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

[PeterJH79]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

Dear sinner, it is simple but requires hard work.

Ecclesiastes 12:13
Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

Hardwork? Such as? I don't want to burn in hell! I want to go to Heaven. what work do I need to do? How can I get there?

[PeterJH79]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

Are you retarded? By not playing Fortnite Battle Royale of course. Duh!

James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

I guess so according to you

[PeterJH79]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

bump

[TheOneFromHell]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

Ya know if your literally just going to read one thing and then think your some holy mother*expletive removed* you high praising *vulgar references to female anatomy removed by your friendly moderator* *lame but slightly annoying threats against the continued existence of an organism removed*

[TheOneFromHell]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

Nope so drop you ideas dead and bury them like you will be soon 6 feet under when old age and cancer get you

[SundayIsForFootball]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

Another closet racist trump supporting hate filled "church". With a bunch of caucasian males that have a history of mental illnesses and pedophilia. In the USA caucasian males lead the country in welfare, food stamps, murder, homelessness, pedophilia, and mental illness.

Pray that god washes your history of being disgusting humans away forever so that you can be free of this mentality you possess that ruins the world.


Enjoy your life in fear and hate. Mindless white trash with nothing to offer in the world but destroy what they dont "believe" in.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

That seems very much off-topic, but to address your issues:

We are not Caucasian dear: we are mostly American, though some of us have been called to serve Our Lord elsewhere. For the avoidance of confusion, here is a helpful map of the Caucasian region:

I don't believe that any of our congregation comes from there. A pastor will correct me if I am wrong. I would post a map of the United States, to show you the difference, but you can probably look that up for yourself. Let me know if you don't have Google in your country.

Nor are we racists - far from it! Our own beloved Brother Gonzalez is some sort of Mexican, which I think shows our inclusivity. As for male, we ladies have our own important role here. And, as for the pedophile slur, you are perhaps confusing us with the catholics? This is a problem we see regularly here, although the name Landover Baptist Church seems pretty non-closet.

But enough about us! Why not introduce yourself properly by starting your own thread, dedicated especially to you, on the Introduction Forum?

Because I'm sure you are a very special person and we would all love to get to know you better and understand your ignorant prejudices against our Church.

All the best, dear,
Joanna Lytton-Vasey (Mrs)

[ForkKnife21]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

Please, will someone inform me that all of this is true, so that i may sleep tonight.

[James Hutchins]

Re: 6 Ways Fortnite Players Serve Satan

Please, will someone inform me that all of this is true, so that i may sleep tonight.

All true friend, this game is that bad (probably worse).

[ForkKnife21]

Ben Shapiro

All true friend, this game is that bad (probably worse).

I was referring to the thread as a whole, the people that think Fortnite even references Climate Change, the overuse of TMs and that weird 'Probing for Jesus' stamp thing. Fortnite may not be a good game, but it certainly has nothing to do with Satan.


We're all living on a ball, the Earth is going to die from Global Warming, and I have a Google Chrome extension that turns the word Jesus into Ben Shapiro on all web-pages.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Ben Shapiro

I was referring to the thread as a whole, the people that think Fortnite even references Climate Change, the overuse of TMs and that weird 'Probing for Jesus' stamp thing. Fortnite may not be a good game, but it certainly has nothing to do with Satan.


We're all living on a ball, the Earth is going to die from Global Warming, and I have a Google Chrome extension that turns the word Jesus into Ben Shapiro on all web-pages.

Freind, you are quite the 'doom and gloom' sort of personb. I am saddened to hear you do not get enough fake news already to were you have to have machinations create even more fake news just for you. Living in a bubble of an alternate reality is going to be very heartbreaking when you finally put down that needle of maryjuanna and come to the Glory of Jesus. It is blasphemous that you change out His name with a hook nosed joo that is part of the clan that killd Him.
I'll pray for your worthless soul.