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  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78552
    #16
    Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

    Originally posted by Jonathan Sykes View Post
    Private forums, yet anyone can register and post freely.

    Besides, I bet if I posted there I'd get insulted aswell.
    Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

    And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

    I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

      Comment

      • MitzaLizalor
        Completely CRAZY for the Lord
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2010
        • 14160
        #17
        Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

        Originally posted by Eulogy Jones View Post
        Are nuka-cola quantums satanic to? I have quite a few in my crib.
        Crib?

          Comment

          • Flowerbloom
            Unsaved trash
             
            • Apr 2014
            • 26
            #18
            Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

            NukaCola Quantum? Why are you referencing to the satanic game Fallout 3 http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showt...highlight=Nuka. And sorry I can't link to a more holy site but conservapedia doesn't have any articles written by the Christians of the site. http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Nuka-Cola it doesn't have any Holy Scripture, this is insulting to Christians.

              Comment

              • LeAtheist
                Confirmed Enemy of God
                • Apr 2014
                • 52
                #19
                Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                I drink energy drinks every day, and it is Christ who has inspired me to do so.

                PRAISE JESUS AND HIS WISDOM! Energy drinks are a gift sent from Heaven

                  Comment

                  • Mother Of Seven
                    True Christian™ with a quiverful
                    • Jan 2014
                    • 2243
                    #20
                    Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                    You're not attending a Mary worshipping papist church are you?

                      Comment

                      • Flowerbloom
                        Unsaved trash
                         
                        • Apr 2014
                        • 26
                        #21
                        Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                        I know that "Christ" is definitely not our Christ.

                          Comment

                          • LeAtheist
                            Confirmed Enemy of God
                            • Apr 2014
                            • 52
                            #22
                            Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                            Originally posted by Mother Of Seven View Post
                            You're not attending a Mary worshipping papist church are you?
                            No I do not, and I will not question the LORDS reason for making me want to drink this liquid gold.

                              Comment

                              • Flowerbloom
                                Unsaved trash
                                 
                                • Apr 2014
                                • 26
                                #23
                                Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                                I don't know what your "Gold" is but it's flavor must taste like Hell.

                                  Comment

                                  • LeAtheist
                                    Confirmed Enemy of God
                                    • Apr 2014
                                    • 52
                                    #24
                                    Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                                    Originally posted by Flowerbloom View Post
                                    I know that "Christ" is definitely not our Christ.
                                    Are you suggesting there is one than one God?

                                      Comment

                                      • Daisy Mae Johnson
                                        The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                                        Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                                        aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                                        True Christian™
                                        • Sep 2006
                                        • 15708
                                        #25
                                        Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                                        Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                                        I want to warn all you young Christians out there about the dangers of the so-called "energy drinks" that are so popular now. As I have long suspected, they are part of a joo plot to get you to worship satan. Exhibit "A":


                                        Oh my Lord-a-Mercy! Why, it looks like Satan's own claw marks!
                                        sigpic

                                        Tweet me Here
                                        My GODLY Bio Here

                                          Comment

                                          • Nobar King
                                            Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
                                            Christ's Guardian
                                            True Christian™
                                            • Sep 2007
                                            • 23748
                                            #26
                                            Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                                            I must have missed this the first time around and I can't even count the number of these evil drinks that I have drunken (drinken?) I'm probably doomed.

                                            Isn't there some kind of gov't agency that can ban labels like this? How did they miss this?
                                            May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

                                              Comment

                                              • DemonThinker96
                                                Unsaved trash, repulsive teenaged demon
                                                • Apr 2014
                                                • 122
                                                #27
                                                Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                                                Is EVERYTHING satanic to you guys? Lighten up! energy drinks are fine!
                                                Rom.1:26-27
                                                For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature. And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.

                                                  Comment

                                                  • Mary Etheldreda
                                                    Gushing for Jesus
                                                     
                                                    • Sep 2011
                                                    • 23775
                                                    #28
                                                    Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                                                    Originally posted by DemonThinker96 View Post
                                                    Is EVERYTHING satanic to you guys? Lighten up! energy drinks are fine!
                                                    Forgive me if I don't take your word for it.

                                                    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                                                      Comment

                                                      • Danielle Faith
                                                        Confirmed Enemy of God
                                                        • May 2014
                                                        • 5
                                                        #29
                                                        Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                                                        Originally posted by Nobar King View Post
                                                        I must have missed this the first time around and I can't even count the number of these evil drinks that I have drunken (drinken?) I'm probably doomed.

                                                        Isn't there some kind of gov't agency that can ban labels like this? How did they miss this?
                                                        Drank is the correct form I believe sir.

                                                          Comment

                                                          • Flowerbloom
                                                            Unsaved trash
                                                             
                                                            • Apr 2014
                                                            • 26
                                                            #30
                                                            Re: Energy Drinks Are Satanic!

                                                            Please do not correct a True Christian™ unsaved trash like you and me on this forum should respect True Christians™.

                                                              Comment

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