Brother Porter! Praise God! My Coworker is Not Gay Anymore

[BrotherLarry]

HALLELUJAH

The story I am about to tell you proves the absolute power of prayer and the absolute changing power of Christ's shed blood. At my former job, I had a coworker (named Lance) about whom I've posted here a few times in the past. He was queer as a three dollar bill and to make matters worse, he was one of those flamboyant, sissy queers who always wore skinny jeans, four earrings, and a fluffy pastel shirt.


Obviously, as a homer gay, he was involved in homer gay things, most of which are too vile to place in this forum. All of them involved his distorted view of what s-e-x should be. Well, I prayed for him many times and finally kidnapped him, tied him to a Datsun sedan and paid a Messican $20 to take him to the ministry center of Dr. Harold Porter.


I will leave it to Brother Harold to comment on Lance's regimen of treatment, but Lance returned to NYC today a changed man. I was the first person he looked up and he said, "I don't know how I'm going to pay you back, buddy - but I'm going to pay you back." He then walked off in a seeming daze. I am certain it was the result of the Holy Spirit moving on him. He looked back once or twice, shook a fist (at the devil, I think) and said "See you soon, man." He walked funny but at least it was better than the prancing around he used to do.


Oh, PRAISE GOD, it is so good to see the fruits of the Lord. All I can say to Brother Harold is this: I don't know what happened while Lance was in your care, but I do know he isn't the same fag I sent there weeks ago.


If there is anything I need to do to help him maintain his new heterosexuality, please let me know. Is there an ex-gay care guide?


Praise the LORD of hosts, I can finally be friends with this guy. I just can't wait until he comes back to see me. Glory to God!


If you are a fag and are reading this, let it give you hope! Let it prove that Jesus has a plan for you! (Jeremiah 29:11)


BrotherLarry

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Brother Porter! Praise God! My Coworker is Not Gay Anymore

HALLELUJAH

The story I am about to tell you proves the absolute power of prayer and the absolute changing power of Christ's shed blood. At my former job, I had a coworker (named Lance) about whom I've posted here a few times in the past. He was queer as a three dollar bill and to make matters worse, he was one of those flamboyant, sissy queers who always wore skinny jeans, four earrings, and a fluffy pastel shirt.


Obviously, as a homer gay, he was involved in homer gay things, most of which are too vile to place in this forum. All of them involved his distorted view of what s-e-x should be. Well, I prayed for him many times and finally kidnapped him, tied him to a Datsun sedan and paid a Messican $20 to take him to the ministry center of Dr. Harold Porter.


I will leave it to Brother Harold to comment on Lance's regimen of treatment, but Lance returned to NYC today a changed man. I was the first person he looked up and he said, "I don't know how I'm going to pay you back, buddy - but I'm going to pay you back." He then walked off in a seeming daze. I am certain it was the result of the Holy Spirit moving on him. He looked back once or twice, shook a fist (at the devil, I think) and said "See you soon, man." He walked funny but at least it was better than the prancing around he used to do.


Oh, PRAISE GOD, it is so good to see the fruits of the Lord. All I can say to Brother Harold is this: I don't know what happened while Lance was in your care, but I do know he isn't the same fag I sent there weeks ago.


If there is anything I need to do to help him maintain his new heterosexuality, please let me know. Is there an ex-gay care guide?


Praise the LORD of hosts, I can finally be friends with this guy. I just can't wait until he comes back to see me. Glory to God!


If you are a fag and are reading this, let it give you hope! Let it prove that Jesus has a plan for you! (Jeremiah 11:29)


BrotherLarry

This unambiguous tale of good cheer and camaraderie is proof positive of the power of Jesus in the face of the gaywise.

Being gay is a choice like colour of your clothes, the size of your car or the love in your heart for Jesus and Brother Porter's methods walk lock step with the love that Jesus has for people to exercise their free will to do exactly what He says in all things, forever!

Glory!

YIC

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Brother Porter! Praise God! My Coworker is Not Gay Anymore

Lance was a very difficult subject; probably the most degenerate and reprobate homo-rectalist I have ever been involved with, in expunging years of gay demon manifestations. And I am not a young man, so he was more than a handful.

I knew this would involve at least a week of intense and carefully focused ministrations the minute he was dropped off. Asking him to meet me in my study, for private consultation, the queer actually started skipping down the hall, like a little girl. "Lance, stop that!".

Thorough oral interaction in evaluating the queer is essential in determining the correct methodology of extracting the issue (or issues) from the deepest and darkest parts of a man that has decided to be a homosexual. Oral therapy consumed much of the first day of treatment, and we both got to the point that our mouths and vocal chords were simply worn out and sore from mutual and reciprocal testimony and reassurance.

The common misconception that ALL men have at least entertained some degree of erotic homosexual fantasy is false. This is nothing more than fake psychology. But SOME males are weak and, according to this whimpering sissy, a flirting thought he had when he was 6 for a playmate, is why he ended up in his thirties as an insatiable bottom queen. With an alternately distended and prolapsed rectum, and an indispensable fanny pack of Depends.

I cannot disclose much of the rest of our daily sessions, as they are medically sensitive and therefore private. But there was pain, humiliation, tears and sobbing as we worked through the therapy. Suffice to say that by the end of the week, Lance was convinced that homosexuality was no longer a viable or healthy lifestyle choice. Lance is a normal man now, for the most part.

Having said this, there will likely be instances and displays of effeminateness, as Lance's inclinations to be the female gayboy were (and continue to be) very deeply and chronically ingrained within his fragile psyche. But Lance will never again act out on these tendencies, and drop his pants with his ankles next to his ears. Of this, I am certain.


In Christ

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Brother Porter! Praise God! My Coworker is Not Gay Anymore

It always brings a tear to my eyes when a filthy gay sees the light that is Jesus Christ and stops raping innocent young boys in their behinds over and over and over and over and over and over again. Sorry, I lost my train of thought there for a second.

God loves us so much that in Leviticus 20:13 he command us to improve the world by killing all gays. Once Donald Trump becomes our president and replaces those idiotic Jesus hating laws forbidding us from killing all the gays, Lance can join us in ridding America of all the filth.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Brother Porter! Praise God! My Coworker is Not Gay Anymore

Well, gentlemen, Lance is acting out in new ways - no doubt the result of demonic oppression trying to win him back. He was standing outside on the sidewalk yelling up at me to meet him outside this morning. When I walked out the door, he lunged at me as if to try and hug me or something and I was able to use leverage to push him away. He had fists clenched and his face was quite red. Apparently homo lust is a strong thing. This is the first time he's ever come on to me like that.


Still, I just praise God that he is free of his deviant obsessions and that the power of Christ's blood now radiates through him, even if he is acting like a pouting little sissy right now. Keep him in prayers. The restraining order has been filed in Jesus Name since I must be a temptation for him based on his actions of just a few hours ago.


As he walked away, he said "I want to know where Porter is! I want him now!" But the police didn't think it was a good idea for me to provide the address. I suppose they've heard of you, Brother Harold, and understand that this is a time when Lance has to work out certain things on his own.


Thank You, JESUS, for setting another soul free. What a wonderful Savior we serve.