[mary27]

Re: Introduction

hI..thanks for letting me in this site..I m a baptist true believer in Christ..

[jfcoopjr]

Re: Introduction

As I have said before, it is only a metaphor for now. I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit. I am however studying various sources to become one physically. This coming semester, I will be studying human anatomy and physiology at college, while in my own time, I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.

Greetings fellow wretched sinner, FagWolf!

I was reading through your introductory posts and in my newly cleansed heart, Jesus told me to assure you that even in you present condition, although a wretched sinner and a self-professed buggerist, there is hope for even one such as you.

I've gone Straight-4-Jesus since hanging around these ! I hate sin and that old me, so I've crucified that old self (Galatians 2:20) and with in me, I get a new life to live! You can too! Now I'm praying and searching God's chosen, Landover Baptist© women for any potential obedient, Christ-like, bride-to-be.

Just get saved!

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=67449

Confess publicly that you're a sinner (1 John 1:9), and invite Jesus to come inside you. That's what I did. Now, I'm studying sermons and church teachings, reading other posts, and trying to get involved. So, I'm just trying to follow God's Word and testify to the other wretched sinners!

"Only let your conversation be as it becometh the Gospel of Christ: that whether I come and see you, or else be absent, I may hear of your affairs, that ye stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the Faith of the Gospel; And in nothing terrified by your adversaries: which is to them an evident token of perdition, but to you of salvation, and that of God. 29For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on Him, but also to suffer for His sake; Having the same conflict which ye saw in me, and now hear to be in me." (Philipians 1:27-30)

If I may, I would make a suggestion ... consider cutting all that hair! (1 Corinthians 11:14)

Now, when you're solid in the Word, there were some pretty radical Nazarites who were set aside for the in the old testament who were permitted to look "rough" for , (Numbers 6:5) In my mind, the Duck Dynasty Patriarchy and Christian role models probably resemble those Nazarites pretty closely. I'm not really sure, because I just went Straight-4-Jesus myself.

Even John, the original Landover Baptist©, was known for his "fuzzy" appearances (Matthew 3:4). But I would certainly pray and talk to God's anointed professional Landover Baptist© ministry team and seek pastoral counseling from other s about that notion.

I may be wrong, but it does give you a few questions to talk about with other s.

Yours in Christ,

James, a fellow wretched sinner and now Straight-4-Jesus©!

[FagWolf]

Re: Introduction

I'd expect that first up would be to determine whether you actually have a soul that can be Saved™. With you being a werewolf, that doesn't look promising.

If they determine you do have a soul, the next step would be a determination of your annual income (and expected tithing level), and delegation of your case to a team of Pastoral Researchers Increasing Christian Knowledge (or "P.R.I.C.K.®"s). These gentlemen would be in charge of whatever exorcism they could get your family to pay for determine is necessary to assist in your Salvation™.

If no soul is found, various poking and prodding to determine where you fit in a baraminological framework, and surgeries (probably amateurishly done and very painful) to remove whatever samples as would be required for evaluation.

Finally, vivisection (for research purposes; you're not anti-science, are you?) and then taxidermic mounting for display in the Landover Baptist University Creation Science Museum (or Zeke's den, possibly).

Since you are "no longer human", you have, of course, forfeited your rights as a US citizen, so any appeals will fall on deaf ears.

Yeah . . . Good luck with that, bro :v

[Didymus Much]

Re: Introduction

Oh? And what exactly does this "institute" do exactly?

I'd expect that first up would be to determine whether you actually have a soul that can be Saved™. With you being a werewolf, that doesn't look promising.

If they determine you do have a soul, the next step would be a determination of your annual income (and expected tithing level), and delegation of your case to a team of Pastoral Researchers Increasing Christian Knowledge (or "P.R.I.C.K.®"s). These gentlemen would be in charge of whatever exorcism they could get your family to pay for determine is necessary to assist in your Salvation™.

If no soul is found, various poking and prodding to determine where you fit in a baraminological framework, and surgeries (probably amateurishly done and very painful) to remove whatever samples as would be required for evaluation.

Finally, vivisection (for research purposes; you're not anti-science, are you?) and then taxidermic mounting for display in the Landover Baptist University Creation Science Museum (or Zeke's den, possibly).

Since you are "no longer human", you have, of course, forfeited your rights as a US citizen, so any appeals will fall on deaf ears.

[FagWolf]

Re: Introduction

I have sent a lengthy, officious and intelligent sounding letter to the Security and Investigations Ministry, with the suggestion that you be captured and brought to the Freehold Institute for Applied Biblical Studies, that you may be examined.

Oh? And what exactly does this "institute" do exactly?

[Alvin Moss]

Re: Introduction

As I have said before, it is only a metaphor for now. I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit. I am however studying various sources to become one physically. This coming semester, I will be studying human anatomy and physiology at college, while in my own time, I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.

I have sent a lengthy, officious and intelligent sounding letter to the Security and Investigations Ministry, with the suggestion that you be captured and brought to the Freehold Institute for Applied Biblical Studies, that you may be examined.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Introduction

Mrs. Johnson,your attempts to frighten me into a state of repentance are lackadaisical, as well as futile. Hell, a James Hutchins gave a more graphic and detailed threat as to what would happen to me, yet I spat at him and shrugged his words aside.

Friend, you should save all that spit in a jar, you'll want to use it to cool your flesh as you roast in Hell.
Laugh all you want at Jesus. Just think for a moment. What if, what if you are wrong and we are right. Is all of eternity worth agamble. Think about it. If you are lucky, you'll live on Earth for 90 years. Then spend untold THOUSANDS in Hell. Is the scant 90 years worth wasting in comparison?
Back in the 'Nam, young privates would 'dip into' the local 'B' girls and soon have their minds ravaged by sexual demons. Sure, prayer cured them but the months of agony followed by the years of shame along with the often deformed children God bestowed on them as a reminder of their foolishness. do you think it was worth it?
Would you drink Drano if you were thirsty or would you rather go to God?

[Jack Glass]

Re: Introduction

Although I am not the polished Bible scholar like may of the sage pastors, I may have uncovered something.

Matthew 7:15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.

The above scripture suggests to me that this fagwolf is not only a delusional teenage pervert, but has inadvertently admitted to being a false prophet.

Matthew 24:11 And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.

Well he hasn't deceived me!

Matthew 24:12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.

I for one, am not prepared to risk my love wax getting cold so I'm keeping well clear!

[Eternal Flame]

Re: Introduction

Take away the clothes,the guns,kill off the dog,and a human is as vulnerable as a newborn animal with little chance of survival. If another creature doesn't smite them first, then the elements will surely kill them. A wolf has the body for survival,with a coat to brave the harshest winters,legs and claws to tread though the toughest terrain, and teeth and a bite force strong enough to break the bones of other animals,large or small..

Your argument is idiotic. The good Lord blessed us with all of those things and brains to make them work for us. Take away a shark's teeth or a lion's teeth and claws and you'd have a right kitten.

EDIT: Distinguished Professor White, I see you said what was on my mind even more eloquently and biblical than I. I know our kids are in the hands of a great man while at the Landover Baptist university campus.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Introduction

Take away the clothes,the guns,kill off the dog,and a human is as vulnerable as a newborn animal with little chance of survival. If another creature doesn't smite them first, then the elements will surely kill them. A wolf has the body for survival,with a coat to brave the harshest winters,legs and claws to tread though the toughest terrain, and teeth and a bite force strong enough to break the bones of other animals,large or small..

And a life expectancy in the wild of maybe 10 years, tops, followed by being cannibalized by your pack as soon as one of them senses any weakness.

Great plan you got there, bud.

Do you often get picked on in school?

Verily, Mr. Much. Even an atheist understands that this person has the romantic but unrealistic view of the lupine existence as most teenagers do.

Why would we be forced to discard clothing? God gave us things to wear (Genesis 3:21) and He also made the first weapon (Genesis 3:24), gave us cities (Genesis 4:17) to protect us and dwelling-places, such as tents (Genesis 4:20)! These things are our birthright. Why should we give them up?

As for wolves, Mr. Much gave you a decent view into the sorry state of their life choices. If I may, I'd also like to add that the wolf pack is ruled by the alpha female. She is the one who chooses those who will have breeding privileges and who will eat first. As a sodomite male, the chances of you becoming her favorite are quite small. As the other male wolves are presumable straight, we can also assume that it is going to be hard to find other partners in fornication, either. Or perhaps you are aspiring to become a Steppenwolf? A lonely wanderer howling at the full Moon? In that case you won't have the pack and your chances of catching any charismatic megafauna are nil. You powers of magnificent mastication will be wasted on small rodents or half-rotten carcasses.



It is your choice, of course, if you find a suitable demon capable of performing this black sorcery on your being. I choose to be the Image of God, of Jesus!

Genesis 1:27
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

That is what mature adults do. They recognize the facts of the Bible and the privileges of human existence dictated by Jesus even after the vile first harlot woman caused the Fall!


Here we can see God Creating Adam.



Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Didymus Much]

Re: Introduction

Take away the clothes,the guns,kill off the dog,and a human is as vulnerable as a newborn animal with little chance of survival. If another creature doesn't smite them first, then the elements will surely kill them. A wolf has the body for survival,with a coat to brave the harshest winters,legs and claws to tread though the toughest terrain, and teeth and a bite force strong enough to break the bones of other animals,large or small..

And a life expectancy in the wild of maybe 10 years, tops, followed by being cannibalized by your pack as soon as one of them senses any weakness.

Great plan you got there, bud.

Do you often get picked on in school?

[FagWolf]

Re: Introduction

Take away the clothes,the guns,kill off the dog,and a human is as vulnerable as a newborn animal with little chance of survival. If another creature doesn't smite them first, then the elements will surely kill them. A wolf has the body for survival,with a coat to brave the harshest winters,legs and claws to tread though the toughest terrain, and teeth and a bite force strong enough to break the bones of other animals,large or small..

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Introduction

I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.

Isaiah 8:19 And when they shall say unto you, Seek unto them that have familiar spirits, and unto wizards that peep, and that mutter: should not a people seek unto their God? for the living to the dead?

You are in deep doo-doo son. I can't wait for the day Jesus gets ahold of you. He'll sort you out alright.

Leviticus 20:27 A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Introduction

As I have said before, it is only a metaphor for now. I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit. I am however studying various sources to become one physically. This coming semester, I will be studying human anatomy and physiology at college, while in my own time, I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.

Boy, you already have the body of THE apex predator ordained by God to have dominion over the animals and plants.

Why would you want to fool around, turning into a Hellbound doggy and baying at the moon and whatever else it is you imagine werewolves doing when you could be out there in the woods with your hunting and fishing license as God intended?


This is what apex predators looks like:



(Note that the dog is submissive to them. I'm sure being submissive is no problem for you, though. Queer.)

[Didymus Much]

Re: Introduction

...I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit...

Sorry, kid, we're full up on the "crazy" here.