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  • Mrs. Cotton Mather X
    Unsaved trash
    • Jan 2009
    • 13

    #1

    Hi all!

    I'm Mehitable Mather, submissive wife of the Reverend Cotton Mather X. I'm looking forward to having some good discussions, particularly on pie-making, with other righteous folk.
  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78556

    #2
    Re: Hi all!

    Originally posted by Mrs. Cotton Mather X View Post
    I'm Mehitable Mather, submissive wife of the Reverend Cotton Mather X. I'm looking forward to having some good discussions, particularly on pie-making, with other righteous folk.
    Please tell us about yourself. How old are you? What church do you attend? Why are you posting here instead of your Husband?

    And why are you named after that nigra terrorist Malcom?

    Details, please.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

    Comment

    • Mrs. Cotton Mather X
      Unsaved trash
      • Jan 2009
      • 13

      #3
      Re: Hi all!

      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
      Please tell us about yourself. How old are you? What church do you attend? Why are you posting here instead of your Husband?

      And why are you named after that nigra terrorist Malcom?

      Details, please.
      I'm 43. I attend a sect that has broken away from the popish Church of England. My husband is a very busy man, so he has kindly granted me permission to post here in his stead. And it's X as in tenth. My dear husband is a direct descendant of the first the Reverend Cotton Mather.

      Comment

      • Pastor Ezekiel
        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 78556

        #4
        Re: Hi all!

        Originally posted by Mrs. Cotton Mather X View Post
        I'm 43. I attend a sect that has broken away from the popish Church of England. My husband is a very busy man, so he has kindly granted me permission to post here in his stead. And it's X as in tenth. My dear husband is a direct descendant of the first the Reverend Cotton Mather.
        So you live in Godless England? I'm sorry to hear that. I have to say you speak American pretty well for a damned foreigner.

        Does your cult follow the Bible? Which version?
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • Hymie Goldberg
          WARNING: Known Christ Killer!
          • May 2008
          • 161

          #5
          Re: Hi all!

          And maybe insurance, why not? Are you properly insured to be on these interwebs, bubeleh?

          Always the wise housewife takes out appropriate cover in these uncertain (and possibly end) days I think.

          Shalom

          Hymie
          (Who has a prospectus)
          1 Thessalonians 2:14 ... the Jews:
          2:15 Who both killed the Lord Jesus, and their own prophets, and have persecuted us; and they please not God, and are contrary to all men: 2:16 Forbidding us to speak to the Gentiles that they might be saved, to fill up their sins alway: for the wrath is come upon them to the uttermost.

          Comment

          • Mrs. Cotton Mather X
            Unsaved trash
            • Jan 2009
            • 13

            #6
            Re: Hi all!

            Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
            So you live in Godless England? I'm sorry to hear that. I have to say you speak American pretty well for a damned foreigner.
            Goodness gracious no, and praise the Good Lord!! That heathen nation is crawling with Mohammedans!!

            No, our forebears escaped from that Sodom in the 1600s and sought refuge on the shores of the only land God has blessed, at least once we had followed his will and cleansed it of the nekkid native heathen population.

            Does your cult follow the Bible? Which version?
            Of course! The only true word of God, the King James Version.

            Comment

            • Mrs. Cotton Mather X
              Unsaved trash
              • Jan 2009
              • 13

              #7
              Re: Hi all!

              Originally posted by Hymie Goldberg View Post
              And maybe insurance, why not? Are you properly insured to be on these interwebs, bubeleh?

              Always the wise housewife takes out appropriate cover in these uncertain (and possibly end) days I think.

              Shalom

              Hymie
              (Who has a prospectus)
              I'm sorry, Hymie. You seem to be a relatively nice man for a killer, but I couldn't possibly do business with one of you people.

              Comment

              • Pastor Al E Pistle
                Christ's Cōnsiliārius
                 
                • Sep 2006
                • 9323

                #8
                Re: Hi all!

                Originally posted by Hymie Goldberg View Post
                And maybe insurance, why not? Are you properly insured to be on these interwebs, bubeleh?

                Always the wise housewife takes out appropriate cover in these uncertain (and possibly end) days I think.

                Shalom

                Hymie
                (Who has a prospectus)
                Goldfarb, you damn JOO! Again with the bubeleh? Haven't I told you not to use foreign words in this GODLY forum?
                Don't be peddling your Madoff insurance plans to TRUE CHRISTIANS(TM), you hebe-jeeby!

                Say, are you related to Milton? He is one of our JOO accountants?
                Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


                Comment

                • Mrs. Cotton Mather X
                  Unsaved trash
                  • Jan 2009
                  • 13

                  #9
                  Re: Hi all!

                  Please excuse me, Pastor Pistle sir, but how much longer am to have this scurrilous "unsaved thrash" designation appended to my good name? I can assure you that not only am I saved, but as one of the elect I was predestined from the beginning of time for salvation while the vast majority of the dregs of humanity were predestined for eternal torment.

                  Praise the Lord for His justice and mercy!!!

                  Comment

                  • Bob4God
                    Moderator
                    Arms Dealer for CHRIST
                    Hands folded for Jesus
                     
                    • Apr 2008
                    • 5274

                    #10
                    Re: Hi all!

                    Welcome Sister!

                    It's good to see that some of the last puritans aren't just the ones in America. There are a handful of True Christian members on our forum who aren't living in GOD's favorite country (USA! USA! USA!) but they are nevertheless saved and on their way to Heaven. I assume this is what GOD means when He says He has sheep in other folds.

                    PRAISE!
                    sigpic
                    The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
                    - Proverbs 15:3

                    CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


                    CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


                    Comment

                    • Mrs. Cotton Mather X
                      Unsaved trash
                      • Jan 2009
                      • 13

                      #11
                      Re: Hi all!

                      Originally posted by Bob4God View Post
                      Welcome Sister!

                      It's good to see that some of the last puritans aren't just the ones in America. There are a handful of True Christian members on our forum who aren't living in GOD's favorite country (USA! USA! USA!) but they are nevertheless saved and on their way to Heaven. I assume this is what GOD means when He says He has sheep in other folds.

                      PRAISE!
                      Forgive me Brother Bob -- I am very reluctant to instruct a man -- but if you will direct your attention to #6, you will see that I am indeed a proud citizen of the only Godly nation left on earth. I can assure you that there are no True Christians left anywhere in the so-called "European Union" or more accurately, The Devil's Playground. Pope worshipers, yes. Joos and Hindoos, yes. Mohammedans, definitely. Sodomites and fornicators galore. Blasphemers, baby killers, and other sundry riffraff are a dime a dozen. But nary a True Christian.

                      Comment

                      • Billy Ram
                        Forum Member
                        Forum Member
                        • Jan 2009
                        • 220

                        #12
                        Re: Hi all!

                        Originally posted by Mrs. Cotton Mather X View Post
                        Please excuse me, Pastor Pistle sir, but how much longer am to have this scurrilous "unsaved thrash" designation appended to my good name? I can assure you that not only am I saved, but as one of the elect I was predestined from the beginning of time for salvation while the vast majority of the dregs of humanity were predestined for eternal torment.

                        Praise the Lord for His justice and mercy!!!
                        Is that a hint of Calvinism I smell, don't forget the Good Lord desires all men to be saved, even though He blinds most to the truth. Praise Him. Anyways hello and welcome.

                        Comment

                        • Mrs. Cotton Mather X
                          Unsaved trash
                          • Jan 2009
                          • 13

                          #13
                          Re: Hi all!

                          Originally posted by Billy Ram View Post
                          Is that a hint of Calvinism I smell, don't forget the Good Lord desires all men to be saved, even though He blinds most to the truth. Praise Him. Anyways hello and welcome.
                          We'll have to agree to disagree on that point, Brother Billy. It is a demonstration of the Lord's mercy when He saves a select few. It is a demonstration of His justice when he casts the rest down into the fiery pit of everlasting, excruciating torment.

                          Those of us in Heaven will have the privilege of looking down upon the damned and praising the Lord for his righteousness. Hallelujah and Amen!!

                          Comment

                          • Bob4God
                            Moderator
                            Arms Dealer for CHRIST
                            Hands folded for Jesus
                             
                            • Apr 2008
                            • 5274

                            #14
                            Re: Hi all!

                            Originally posted by Mrs. Cotton Mather X View Post
                            Forgive me Brother Bob -- I am very reluctant to instruct a man -- but if you will direct your attention to #6, you will see that I am indeed a proud citizen of the only Godly nation left on earth. I can assure you that there are no True Christians left anywhere in the so-called "European Union" or more accurately, The Devil's Playground. Pope worshipers, yes. Joos and Hindoos, yes. Mohammedans, definitely. Sodomites and fornicators galore. Blasphemers, baby killers, and other sundry riffraff are a dime a dozen. But nary a True Christian.
                            Ah yes, so I was mistaken. Surely it was a trick of the devil!

                            I will overlook this particular instance, but do be careful in the future when writing confusing posts and then correcting menfolk.

                            GOD bless.
                            sigpic
                            The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
                            - Proverbs 15:3

                            CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


                            CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


                            Comment

                            • Billy Ram
                              Forum Member
                              Forum Member
                              • Jan 2009
                              • 220

                              #15
                              Re: Hi all!

                              Originally posted by Mrs. Cotton Mather X View Post
                              We'll have to agree to disagree on that point, Brother Billy. It is a demonstration of the Lord's mercy when He saves a select few. It is a demonstration of His justice when he casts the rest down into the fiery pit of everlasting, excruciating torment.

                              Those of us in Heaven will have the privilege of looking down upon the damned and praising the Lord for his righteousness. Hallelujah and Amen!!
                              Yes watching the damned weep and gnash their teeth while being sodomized by a flaming demon.... Well, you get my drift. I believe that's what will make heaven, so heavenly. Praise Him.

                              Comment

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