X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • SalvationSeeker
    True Christian™ Theologian
    Forum Member
    • Sep 2006
    • 3892

    #16
    Re: The Man, the Legend...

    Originally posted by The AntiAntiChrist View Post
    Ah yes... though my reputation precedes me abroad, I am always one step ahead of it. I leave sinners in my wake like the dust of Christ's sandal upon the threshold of an ingrateful home. Even so I come quickly, like a thief in broad daylight, dressed in red, the color of the winepress of the wrath of God's fornication. For Her cup runneth over with abominations.
    God's fornication?
    God doesn't fornicate you little homer..
    You better put the crackpipe down, stop playing with yourself, and get right with Christ ASAP!
    Your vain babble and silly lies aren't fooling anyone.

    O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called:
    1 Timothy 6:20

    You're obviously not even a Christian, you obviously don't even THINK of yourself as one. As the stupid cathylick pagans like to do.
    I'd wager a million dollars that you're only a stupid teenager trying to mock God.
    Go away, child. Stop wasting your time, and more importantly, stop wasting ours.
    If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
    A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
    Proverbs 9:12-13

    Comment

    • The AntiAntiChrist
      Unsaved trash
      Under Investigation
      • Mar 2007
      • 13

      #17
      Re: The Man, the Legend...

      Originally posted by SalvationSeeker View Post
      God's fornication?
      God doesn't fornicate you little homer..
      You better put the crackpipe down, stop playing with yourself, and get right with Christ ASAP!
      Your vain babble and silly lies aren't fooling anyone.

      O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called:
      1 Timothy 6:20

      You're obviously not even a Christian, you obviously don't even THINK of yourself as one. As the stupid cathylick pagans like to do.
      I'd wager a million dollars that you're only a stupid teenager trying to mock God.
      Go away, child. Stop wasting your time, and more importantly, stop wasting ours.
      In my line of work, castrating demons, and casting sinners into the crucible of eternity, you have to wrestle with a lot of dark forces. Perhaps I should heed your advice, and perform a banishing of whatever arch-demon has attached itself to my soul. *retires into Temple of Wisdom, with copy of Malleus Maleficarum and serious look on face*

      Comment

      • The AntiAntiChrist
        Unsaved trash
        Under Investigation
        • Mar 2007
        • 13

        #18
        Re: The Man, the Legend...

        Originally posted by OnYourKnees View Post
        You're here because you're upset that we take a harsh view of boy-buggery?
        Harsh? I'll bet you've never even crucified a witch, you sissy.

        Comment

        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78556

          #19
          Re: The Man, the Legend...

          Originally posted by The AntiAntiChrist View Post
          Harsh? I'll bet you've never even crucified a witch, you sissy.
          As far as I know, no True Christian™ Man has ever crucified anyone. That is a punishment reserved for our Savior Jesus Christ, who rose from the dead to save us.

          We deal with witches in....other ways.
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

          Comment

          • SalvationSeeker
            True Christian™ Theologian
            Forum Member
            • Sep 2006
            • 3892

            #20
            Re: The Man, the Legend...

            Originally posted by The AntiAntiChrist View Post
            In my line of work, castrating demons, and casting sinners into the crucible of eternity, you have to wrestle with a lot of dark forces.

            You haven't done any work for God at all, and I don't even know why I bother to point it out, it's so blatantly obvious.

            Perhaps I should heed your advice, and perform a banishing of whatever arch-demon has attached itself to my soul. *retires into Temple of Wisdom, with copy of Malleus Maleficarum and serious look on face*
            Why doesn't it surprise me that you read cathylick crap?
            Your cathylick (pagan) rituals will do no good..
            What you should really do is stop mocking God, accept Jesus Christ as your personal saviour, and stop being a silly moron.

            Jesus temporarily died for the sins of the world, so His elect could get Saved and enter Heaven, and this is how your repay Him?
            If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
            A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
            Proverbs 9:12-13

            Comment

            • Rachael Van Helsing
              HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
              • Sep 2006
              • 5131

              #21
              Re: The Man, the Legend...

              SS, this fine specimen has, I believe, visited landover before, at the time I believe he was declared, by the Pastors, to be 'possessed' (although I'd simply call it a raisin short of a fruitcake ) .

              I thought he was being kept in the rehab center where Lil used to be?
              Last edited by Rachael Van Helsing; 04-10-2007, 08:28 AM.
              sigpic
              Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

              Comment

              • The AntiAntiChrist
                Unsaved trash
                Under Investigation
                • Mar 2007
                • 13

                #22
                Re: The Man, the Legend...

                Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                As far as I know, no True Christian™ Man has ever crucified anyone. That is a punishment reserved for our Savior Jesus Christ, who rose from the dead to save us.

                We deal with witches in....other ways.
                I'll bet I know how you "deal with witches", you vile henchman of Satan. Just make sure the broom handle is wet next time.

                I've seen your ilk before. Once I was chartered by the Vatican to construct a dungeon for white, preppy vampires with a fetish for fetishes. He was hiding out in a Protestant congregation somewhere below the Bible belt, raping little munchkins until they developed split personalities. To this day if you say the trigger phrase "koala" over a cell phone and press the pound key, they will put on a face like Arnold in the Terminator and go looking for John F. Kennedy. I'm not sure if you're a victim, or a messenger, but odds are you're both. Anyway, I'm retired now, and not looking for any trouble. I have laid down my silver crossbow, and want to write my book, get married and have babies with a loose Protestant woman, and die like other men.

                Comment

                • The AntiAntiChrist
                  Unsaved trash
                  Under Investigation
                  • Mar 2007
                  • 13

                  #23
                  Re: The Man, the Legend...

                  Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
                  SS, this fine specimen has, I believe, visited landover before, at the time I believe he was declared, by the Pastors, to be 'possessed' (although I'd simply call it a raisin short of a fruitcake ) .

                  I thought he was being kept in the rehab center where Lil used to be?
                  ...as for you, wicked temptress, keep your diseased devil-jackers off of me. Even these fat, lazy old Protestant good-for-nothings know you're a "Heathen". Don't think you can make me stray from the path with your evil female nature, which is that of the succubus, and the syren, which are repelled back into the fire by the scathing beams of my righteous will. I see you have learned much in the arts of gossip from these land-locked rednecks, but if you make light of the Divine Gifts that have been entrusted to me by the power of our Lord Jesus Christ (and the Virgin Mary), I will be forced to type something long and drawn out in Latin. Mighty angels with sharp swords will rip you from this woman's body, and cast you back into the abyss. I pray that the body and soul of the modest woman you inhabit can still be preserved intact. Particularly her soul. Not so much the body.

                  Comment

                  • SalvationSeeker
                    True Christian™ Theologian
                    Forum Member
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 3892

                    #24
                    Re: The Man, the Legend...

                    Originally posted by The AntiAntiChrist View Post
                    and die like other men.
                    I can see that you want to die..
                    Do you really think you are funny, son?
                    Do you think you are safe and anonymous behind your screen, hiding your boil smitten self in your parents house?
                    TRUST ME when I say this: You cannot hide from God's wrath.

                    ..And you cannot hide from us either. We know who you are, what your name is, and where you live.
                    And once we have taken this glorious land over, and instituted Biblical law.. We already have much of the supreme court on our side.
                    Then we will pay you a visit.. see if laws based on Exodus 22:20 has cured your potty mouth eh?
                    See you then, faggot.
                    Last edited by SalvationSeeker; 04-11-2007, 12:55 AM.
                    If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
                    A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
                    Proverbs 9:12-13

                    Comment

                    Working...