I feel so welcome..........

[Richard Cranium]

I have been admonished for posting in another forum prior to posting in this one, so this is for you, "Dr." Ville.
Luke 17:3
Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him.

I have trespassed against the rules of Landover Baptist, and ask for your forgiveness. I assume that I will be forgiven, unless of course I am stoned or shunned.

Boy, the Mormons didn't treat me this way.....They're so nice and presentable, and you get magic underwear, and your own planet. Maybe they are the One True Church. I'll have to check into it more closely.

[Jonathan H. Dona]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

Boy, the Mormons didn't treat me this way.....They're so nice and presentable, and you get magic underwear, and your own planet. Maybe they are the One True Church. I'll have to check into it more closely.

Son, Mormons are a people of Satan. They worship him at every chance they get and eat green Jell-O. If you truly think that the Mormons are a valiant and worthy people, then you are lost. Praise Jesus and only Jesus, not the false prophets they hail in their polygamist church of sin!

[Richard Cranium]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

But their called the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Baby Jesus right in the name. Notice this isn't Landover of Jesus Christ of Baptists. Seems like they got the one-up on you there.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

I have been admonished for posting in another forum prior to posting in this one, so this is for you, "Dr." Ville.
Luke 17:3
Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him.

I have trespassed against the rules of Landover Baptist, and ask for your forgiveness. I assume that I will be forgiven, unless of course I am stoned or shunned.

Boy, the Mormons didn't treat me this way.....They're so nice and presentable, and you get magic underwear, and your own planet. Maybe they are the One True Church. I'll have to check into it more closely.

Friend, no one admonished you. It was just standard advice. We like new folks to introduce themselves, tell us about their background, what church they attend, etc. That's all. No need to cast aspersions about the good doctor's credentials like that.

We aren't particularly interested in how the Mormoon cult treats you. As Mr. Dona says, they are of satan.

Now, would you like to get on with a friendly introduction here, or just wallow in self-pity and sarcasm?

It is better to hear the rebuke of the wise, than for a man to hear the song of fools.
For as the crackling of thorns under a pot, so is the laughter of the fool: this also is vanity.
Ecclesiastes 7:5-6

[Jonathan H. Dona]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

But their called the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Baby Jesus right in the name. Notice this isn't Landover of Jesus Christ of Baptists. Seems like they got the one-up on you there.

Son, do you know how those Mormons work? They follow a false work known as The Book of Mormon, written by a demon named Joseph Smith. They altered the true, Holy KJV1611 Bible to fit their needs and followed polygamy, which is obviously against the ways of the Bible. I have been trained my whole life to fight them and destroy them, as my forefathers did before me. Trust me, son, and trust the Lord when I say that they are a false people living off of lies and off of a belief in Satan.

[Richard Cranium]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

Well, Pastor E, if you had read my original post and the response of "Dr." Ville, you will see that he called me a vile name. Not a name I haven't been called hundreds of times, yet not something expected from a brother.

Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law (the Old Testament) or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke or a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law (the Old Testament) until everything is accomplished. (Matthew 5:17-18)

Deuteronomy 21:15
If a man have two wives, one beloved, and another hated, and they have born him children, both the beloved and the hated; and if the firstborn son be hers that was hated:


Now, can you explain to me why polygamy is unChristian?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

Well, Pastor E, if you had read my original post and the response of "Dr." Ville, you will see that he called me a vile name. Not a name I haven't been called hundreds of times, yet not something expected from a brother.

Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law (the Old Testament) or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke or a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law (the Old Testament) until everything is accomplished. (Matthew 5:17-18)

Deuteronomy 21:15
If a man have two wives, one beloved, and another hated, and they have born him children, both the beloved and the hated; and if the firstborn son be hers that was hated:


Now, can you explain to me why polygamy is unChristian?

Its not unChristian at all. It IS against secular law, so case closed. We are instructed to obey secular law, without question. This is another example of why Mormoons are not actually Christians.

Anyway, are you going to get on with your self-introduction, or just whine all day? Do you have a dozen wives yourself? Is this issue important to you?

Move on, son.

[Jonathan H. Dona]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery. Luke 16:18


Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Genesis 2:24


And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,
And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. Matthew 19:4-9


And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. Genesis 2:18


Do you see anything in that last passage about the Lord making multiple partners for Adam? Do you see any True Christians today practicing polygamy? No, the only people you even saw practice it were the Mormons, and even they stopped doing it. In the beginning, the Lord created Adam and Eve, two people whose flesh would become one, and that is the way he intended!

Here is another where it is directly said to not take on multiple wives by Moses, who was the Lord's messenger as to whom should tell His commandments.

Neither shall he multiply wives to himself, that his heart turn not away: neither shall he greatly multiply to himself silver and gold. Deuteronomy 17:17

[Richard Cranium]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

Peas and rice, what do you want to know, my social security number? I just tithed, does that mean anything to you people? Do you know what the morons are offering for my tithing? MAGIC UNDERWEAR people! I could rob banks and not worry about getting shot, or go bareback at the bunny ranch, whatever, no worries! And I get my own PLANET.....Top that. Please. There's some things I'm not so sure about with these guys, but they're just so well dressed, and a PLANET!! I've yet to be convinced, and I don't want to f this one up. That'd be a big mistake.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

Peas and rice, what do you want to know, my social security number? I just tithed, does that mean anything to you people? Do you know what the morons are offering for my tithing? MAGIC UNDERWEAR people! I could rob banks and not worry about getting shot, or go bareback at the bunny ranch, whatever, no worries! And I get my own PLANET.....Top that. Please. There's some things I'm not so sure about with these guys, but they're just so well dressed, and a PLANET!! I've yet to be convinced, and I don't want to f this one up. That'd be a big mistake.

Son, I'm beginning to think you are less than what you claim to be. Are you here to mock Jesus? All this childish talk about magic underwear and free planets is not helping us take you seriously.

Can you tell us about your background, what church you were raised in, your favorite Bible verses, any vile sins you've engaged in, and what you hope to accomplish here in God's favorite forum.

And please, don't post quotes from false Bibles (like that Mormoon one). We follow the Holy KJV1611 Bible here. Word for word. Glory!!

[Sister Noddy]

Re: I feel so welcome..........



Forget the Mormons, Mr Richard. They are a cult --- yes that's right --- a cult of misguided, mentally deranged weirdos, and they have been damned ever since Joseph Smith and his demonic visions.

If there really are unbelievers influenced by the devil, then the mormons are them. Understand? Forget the underwear and the planet. No such thing, getting your own planet when you die --- I never heard of such utter nonsense in my life.

Forget the junk Mr Richard, and accept Jesus, then let him run your life for you.

--- nan

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

I have been admonished for posting in another forum prior to posting in this one, so this is for you, "Dr." Ville.
Luke 17:3
Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him.

I have trespassed against the rules of Landover Baptist, and ask for your forgiveness. I assume that I will be forgiven, unless of course I am stoned or shunned.

Boy, the Mormons didn't treat me this way.....They're so nice and presentable, and you get magic underwear, and your own planet. Maybe they are the One True Church. I'll have to check into it more closely.

If you don't like it, sweetie, you don't have to post here.
This is their forum, after all.

[Richard Cranium]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

I only quote KJV, again you are having delusions caused by evil spirits. Let the Truth in.
My background? Unfortunately, unable to have yet kill an infidel. I feel guilty about that, us Americans can't be out done by foreigners in anything, and that includes religious fundamentalism. Time to get off our butts and quit letting all those heathens be converted to Islam. This is my most venal sin.
Like I have stated earlier, given a cruel name by my father. Johnny Cash fan, he was. My middle name is Sue, too. Hid in the Good Book from the harrassment, have read it front to back more than 75 times. Father was a pastor, like I said earlier, arrested for molesting my sister, the brat turned him in. Jesus told us to hate our parents, boy was he right.
Farmer and builder, 9 kids as of yet.
Joined this online group because of The Book of Matthew:

Matthew 6:5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.


So, as churches are just gathering places for hypocrites, so sayeth the Lord, I thought this was a God given solution to religious fellowship that complies with the Law.

Favorite Bible Passages:
Deuteronomy 22:28-29 If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days.

Exodus 21:7-11 7And if a man sell his daughter to be a maidservant, she shall not go out as the menservants do.


8If she please not her master, who hath betrothed her to himself, then shall he let her be redeemed: to sell her unto a strange nation he shall have no power, seeing he hath dealt deceitfully with her.
9And if he have betrothed her unto his son, he shall deal with her after the manner of daughters.
10If he take him another wife; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish. 11And if he do not these three unto her, then shall she go out free without money.

Leviticus 25:44-46 Both thy bondmen, and thy bondmaids, which thou shalt have, shall be of the heathen that are round about you; of them shall ye buy bondmen and bondmaids.


45Moreover of the children of the strangers that do sojourn among you, of them shall ye buy, and of their families that are with you, which they begat in your land: and they shall be your possession. 46And ye shall take them as an inheritance for your children after you, to inherit them for a possession; they shall be your bondmen for ever: but over your brethren the children of Israel, ye shall not rule one over another with rigour.

2 Kings 2:23-24 And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head.

24And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the LORD. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them.

Jeremiah 48:10 Cursed be he that doeth the work of the LORD deceitfully, and cursed be he that keepeth back his sword from blood.


Leviticus 14:49-53 And he shall take to cleanse the house two birds, and cedar wood, and scarlet, and hyssop:


50And he shall kill the one of the birds in an earthen vessel over running water:
51And he shall take the cedar wood, and the hyssop, and the scarlet, and the living bird, and dip them in the blood of the slain bird, and in the running water, and sprinkle the house seven times:
52And he shall cleanse the house with the blood of the bird, and with the running water, and with the living bird, and with the cedar wood, and with the hyssop, and with the scarlet: 53But he shall let go the living bird out of the city into the open fields, and make an atonement for the house: and it shall be clean.

Proverbs 20:30 The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly.


Genesis 19:4-8 But before they lay down, the men of the city, even the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both old and young, all the people from every quarter:


5And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where are the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.
6And Lot went out at the door unto them, and shut the door after him,
7And said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly. 8Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as is good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof.

This is a very short list of my favorite passages. Any other questions? Ask, and ye shall receive.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

Any other questions? Ask, and ye shall receive.

Yes. Are you always this cranky and paranoid?

[Richard Cranium]

Re: I feel so welcome..........

Cranky? I wrote asking a serious question, and nobody on this site has been able to give one righteous answer. You're proving those missionaries that came to my door yesterday more right by the second. All you can do is ridicule? You are not defenders of the faith in any way. I guess Jesus and I will get to both enjoy watching you burn in eternal hell fire together, you and all the Chinese, Africans, Incas, Eskimos, all burning together.....It's gonna smell so sweet. I'll see ya soon baby Jesus!!