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Is this website for real? Or is it a gigantic joke...
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I've found Jesus, he was behind the couch the whole time!
God bless me -
Re: Seriously?
Is Jesus a "joke"? Is the Bible a "joke"? Is the fate of your eternal soul a "joke"? Of course not! We are as real as the computer in front of you, as the walls surrounding you, as real as the fiery pains of Hell that await you if you don't give up your sinful ways and open your heart to the LORD!
I can't begin to tell you the depths and depravity I reached in my life (suffice it to say, I was a member of the Catholic "church"), but when I was born again and cleansed with the sacrificed blood of Christ, the weight of that sin was lifted off me and now I strive to witness and bring that same relief to other people!
How dare you come here and mock our faith, my faith! We are God-fearing, Bible-believing, 100% followers of the WORD of the LORD! TRUE CHRISTIANS who don't throw anything out of the Bible just because it seems cruel or requires us to actually show some control over our lives!
I will pray for God to open your eyes and soften your heart. I just hope that you will pray to Him too.Posted via Prayer
1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!
Blogging for CHRIST!
Witnessing for GOD on YouTube!
All a-Twitter for Salvation!
Bringing Jesus to MySpace!
On FIRE for the Lord on Facebook!
My Ladies of Landover profile!
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Re: Seriously?
I know some people, when they discover the Good News of Landover Baptist Church, say "It's too good to be true! There has to be some sort of catch!"
But there is no catch, friend. We say what we mean and we mean what we say. There's no political correctness here, friend. No word mincing. We tell it like it is.
I wrote an entire thread for the "Pinch me, I must be dreaming" crowd:
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
Did I use a new word you've never heard? Definitions here. | Vote! Everything you need to vote here!Comment
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Re: Seriously?
As Sister Maria and Jeb so rightly say, this website is no more of a joke than Our Glorious Leader is, and as real as the Lord God Almighty.Originally posted by Obey View PostO Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
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God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.Comment
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Re: Seriously?
Dear friend:
I guess that in this age of political correctness and moral relativism, it must seem farfetched that there are still people who preach the Holy Bible as it is, rather than what the liberal feminazis think God should have said. But rest assured that we are dedicated to doing just that, so if you have a problem with what we say here, your problem is with God Almighty and His Word, not with us.This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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Re: Seriously?
I used ta think that these Godly forums was too good to be true as well. I used ta be a good-fo'-nothin', pie stealin', white people hatin', BET watchedin' nigress! Whenevah I had went to the church, I din't care about the LORD, I just cared about hootin' and hollerin' and makin' jigaboo noises just like everybody else up in that colored church. But then He called to me and made me His own, fulfullin' His promise:
Many shall be purified, and made white, and tried; but the wicked shall do wickedly: and none of the wicked shall understand; but the wise shall understand. - Daniel 12:10
And though the Curse of Ham still be on my skin, on the inside, I's got the soul of a white woman. GLORY! Aftah the Lord had cleanseded me, He guided me to Landover and I couldn't believe my eyes! It be the closest thang to Heaven on Earth that I had evah seen! But it be as true and real as every word o' the Bible (KJV1611). So no, it do not be a joke at all. Anythang be possible through Him (Matthew 19:26).sigpic"He went on CNN and he laughed at us, and he said, 'They'll never get me because Allah will protect me. Allah will protect me.' Well, you know what? I knew that my God was bigger than his. I knew that my God was a real God and his was an idol." - Lt. General William G. BoykinComment
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Re: Seriously?
Dear Obey ...Originally posted by Obey View Post
Only at Landover will you get the real WORD of GOD, as it is written in the REAL Bible (King James version 1611), without interpretation, exactly as it was dictated by GOD Himself.
There are so many out there who think they are Christians, belonging to so many wishy-washy-sissy false-feel-good churches, which have changed to scripture to suit themselves.
But how many of them have ever actually read the Bible as it is actually written? Almost nobody. I used to be one of those, but I saw the Light of Jesus before it was too late for me.
Expect to get the True Christian™ truth here, or expect Hell, plain and simple.
We have made our choice, here's hoping you will make yours, Sister Noddy
1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...
1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...
Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...Comment
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Re: Seriously?
I've seen the light. It was kind of hard to find without any whitespace. Just looked like a giant blob of evil, but Jesus showed me the way.I've found Jesus, he was behind the couch the whole time!
God bless meComment
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