In need of blessing

[Tater Faith]

Hello fellow brother and sisters.
My name is Tater.
I came here because a good friend at my local church (First Baptist) told me about this forum. He said the people here would help me and strengthen my personal relationship with Christ. It's been rather difficult for me lately. I've been in a long and hard battle with my homosexuality. I am married, with my lovely wife Holly. I also have two beautiful children, Charlie and Adam (both gifts from God), but Ive been having these queer thoughts lately that have been troubling me. I have been praying, but I still have them.
Hopefully you guys can help me.
Thank you.

[Levi Jones]

Re: In need of blessing

As the Word says, the thought is as bad as the sin. I recommend you read this and make a decision based on what the scripture tells us.

Matthew 5:29-30 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

[Nobar King]

Re: In need of blessing

You obviously haven't been praying hard enough. Or long enough. I suggest more time in your prayer closet, thinking about Jesus and how he touches you in your life.

You might try some kind of response therapy. Like, when you start thinking about fags, do something to take your mind off it, like biting your lip really hard, or pull some hair out.

You can always have the gay beat out of you, but I'll leave the paddling talk for the pastor.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: In need of blessing

Hello fellow brother and sisters.
My name is Tater.
I came here because a good friend at my local church (First Baptist) told me about this forum. He said the people here would help me and strengthen my personal relationship with Christ. It's been rather difficult for me lately. I've been in a long and hard battle with my homosexuality. I am married, with my lovely wife Holly. I also have two beautiful children, Charlie and Adam (both gifts from God), but Ive been having these queer thoughts lately that have been troubling me. I have been praying, but I still have them.
Hopefully you guys can help me.
Thank you.

You are obviously a reprobate homosexual. You may not be beyond saving, but you will have to take serious measures.

The first thing you need to do, Tater, is seperate yourself from the two male children, immediately, for their protection of course. You're lucky I haven't gone to the authorities about this already. Pray to God that those poor little boys never find out what a brush with ass-rape they've already had, or they will never trust a man again.

Next, you should consider getting yourself fixed:

Matthew 19:12 (KJV1611) For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.


Have your wife lie to the children and say that their father was a great war hero. Someday they will be old enough to handle the truth.

Your wife will want a divorce: do not grant her one of course. Someday when you get your head straight, she might come in handy.

Pray, pray, pray. If being on your knees makes you crave anal penetration, do it standing up. If you pray hard enough, and swear off child rape once and for all, there is a slim chance you may stay out of Hell. Good luck. You're going to need it, queer boy.

[Tater Faith]

Re: In need of blessing

You are obviously a reprobate homosexual. You may not be beyond saving, but you will have to take serious measures.

The first thing you need to do, Tater, is seperate yourself from the two male children, immediately, for their protection of course. You're lucky I haven't gone to the authorities about this already. Pray to God that those poor little boys never find out what a brush with ass-rape they've already had, or they will never trust a man again.

Next, you should consider getting yourself fixed:

Matthew 19:12 (KJV1611) For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.


Have your wife lie to the children and say that their father was a great war hero. Someday they will be old enough to handle the truth.

Your wife will want a divorce: do not grant her one of course. Someday when you get your head straight, she might come in handy.

Pray, pray, pray. If being on your knees makes you crave anal penetration, do it standing up. If you pray hard enough, and swear off child rape once and for all, there is a slim chance you may stay out of Hell. Good luck. You're going to need it, queer boy.

Thank you, Brother Jenkins. Your words have been most helpful.
It will be hard, but with your advice the Lord on my side, I will get though this.
I will pray nonstop, till Lucifer unleashes his grip on me and I am one again with Jesus.

Thanks again.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: In need of blessing

You're welcome.

[VA W.A.S.P.]

Re: In need of blessing

Why did you even ever make the choice to ever think this way? Was God testing you or was Satan tempting you? Or are you of such a weak mind that you do understand what a penis is for and are confused? Disgusting. But pray. And if you are too much of a queer to deal with physical castration, your only other chance in hell is to chemically castrate yourself.

Have your wife lie to the children and say that their father was a great war hero.

I must object to this. Using the military in any way to cover up his disgusting, wretched life is very wrong IMHO. His wife should tell their children that he died in some other way, but do not use the military.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: In need of blessing

His wife should tell their children that he died in some other way, but do not use the military.

"Raped to death by queers"? Sort of defeats the purpose. Have you got a better idea?

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: In need of blessing

Hello fellow brother and sisters.
My name is Tater.
I came here because a good friend at my local church (First Baptist) told me about this forum. He said the people here would help me and strengthen my personal relationship with Christ. It's been rather difficult for me lately. I've been in a long and hard battle with my homosexuality. I am married, with my lovely wife Holly. I also have two beautiful children, Charlie and Adam (both gifts from God), but Ive been having these queer thoughts lately that have been troubling me. I have been praying, but I still have them.
Hopefully you guys can help me.
Thank you.

Hello Tater,

You have me concerned. Just how far do these Homer inclinations go?

I mean, if you are thinking of the latest sportswear fashion over the sports themselves, you are truly on your way to Sodomy!

What activities do you do with your sons? Do you take them to the rifle range and wood-chopping events, or are you taking them to Dairy Queen after a shopping splurge so you can all vent your feelings?

These things surely need to be clarified.

IC,

WS

[VA W.A.S.P.]

Re: In need of blessing

"Raped to death by queers"? Sort of defeats the purpose. Have you got a better idea?

Sure. Say that he drowned while deep sea diving looking for pirate treasure. Say that some methamphetamine addicted whore of Sodom mugged and killed him for the 12 dollars in his pocket while in Jew York. Tell them he was shot in a korean grocery store while trying to prevent a robbery. Those are all better ideas.

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: In need of blessing

Why did you even ever make the choice to ever think this way? Was God testing you or was Satan tempting you? Or are you of such a weak mind that you do understand what a penis is for and are confused? Disgusting. But pray. And if you are too much of a queer to deal with physical castration, your only other chance in hell is to chemically castrate yourself.



I must object to this. Using the military in any way to cover up his disgusting, wretched life is very wrong IMHO. His wife should tell their children that he died in some other way, but do not use the military.

I don't have any children, but I do let others know that my husband "died in conflict" when asked.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: In need of blessing

How about, "he died whilst saving a white woman."

[VA W.A.S.P.]

Re: In need of blessing

Yeah, I meant trying to save a white woman bystander in the korean grocery, but thanks for pointing it out! Appreciated!

[Brother Helge]

Re: In need of blessing

I don't have any children, but I do let others know that my husband "died in conflict" when asked.

K.I.A. would do the trick...

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: In need of blessing

I blame whoever named him "Tater".