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Re: I love Jesus!
idolator (n.) a person who worships idols
We do not worship a plate of food, we prepare and consume a dish in honour of The One True Lord and Creator because it pleases him for us to do so.
The Holy Noodle
The Book of Piraticus
We are not cannibals, nor do we claim to be eating the flash or blood of Our Lord and Creator.
Call it an indulgence or a tithe, you can not buy you way out of trouble by handing over cash.
Originally posted by Mrs. P Wintersnow
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So you are an idolater to boot!!
Sick sick sick!!!
Mrs.P.Wintersnow
Sick sick sick!!!
Mrs.P.Wintersnow
We do not worship a plate of food, we prepare and consume a dish in honour of The One True Lord and Creator because it pleases him for us to do so.
The Holy Noodle
The Third Day: Land and Vegetation
Then the FSM said, “Let the earth bring forth grass, semolina, rice, and whatever else can be turned into food that resembles my Noodly Appendages,” and He saw that this was an original idea, which was certainly good.
Then the FSM said, “Let the earth bring forth grass, semolina, rice, and whatever else can be turned into food that resembles my Noodly Appendages,” and He saw that this was an original idea, which was certainly good.
The Olive Garden of Eden
That midget, however, was goddamn noisy. The FSM couldn’t deal with all the complaining down on earth, so the Lord FSM commanded the midget, saying, “Here’s an idea . . . why don’t you collect the semolina, rice and what-have-you, and make pasta in my image. That’s what it’s there for. And fill your mouth with it and be quiet and peaceful. But be careful with the olive tree, for the olive itself is good, but the pit inside is rock hard and you could choke on it or break a tooth, so you should consider it as evil; if you choke you shall surely die. Which would mean I wasted a hell of a lot of time on you, although I’m already having second thoughts.”
That midget, however, was goddamn noisy. The FSM couldn’t deal with all the complaining down on earth, so the Lord FSM commanded the midget, saying, “Here’s an idea . . . why don’t you collect the semolina, rice and what-have-you, and make pasta in my image. That’s what it’s there for. And fill your mouth with it and be quiet and peaceful. But be careful with the olive tree, for the olive itself is good, but the pit inside is rock hard and you could choke on it or break a tooth, so you should consider it as evil; if you choke you shall surely die. Which would mean I wasted a hell of a lot of time on you, although I’m already having second thoughts.”
Chapter 1
1 And the Flying Spaghetti Monster called unto Pirate Mosey, and spake unto him out of the pirate ship of the crew, saying,
2 Speak unto the children of the seven seas, and say unto them, if any pirate brings an offering unto the FSM, ye shall bring your offering of spaghetti and meatballs or rum and fish head stew.
3 And he shall consume this offering and rejoice for the FSM will be pleased.
4 He shall not burn his offerings as no one could receive its goodness if it‟s ashes.
5 Also, it would smell really bad.
6 Although I guess burning the rum would be pretty cool.
7 But I think it has to be over 100 proof to burn and I dunno if pirates can get their hands on good stuff like that.
8 But if he can, he should go for it, cause it would be pretty sweet and it would please me.
1 And the Flying Spaghetti Monster called unto Pirate Mosey, and spake unto him out of the pirate ship of the crew, saying,
2 Speak unto the children of the seven seas, and say unto them, if any pirate brings an offering unto the FSM, ye shall bring your offering of spaghetti and meatballs or rum and fish head stew.
3 And he shall consume this offering and rejoice for the FSM will be pleased.
4 He shall not burn his offerings as no one could receive its goodness if it‟s ashes.
5 Also, it would smell really bad.
6 Although I guess burning the rum would be pretty cool.
7 But I think it has to be over 100 proof to burn and I dunno if pirates can get their hands on good stuff like that.
8 But if he can, he should go for it, cause it would be pretty sweet and it would please me.
Originally posted by Didymus Much
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Call it an indulgence or a tithe, you can not buy you way out of trouble by handing over cash.
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