[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hey there.

I see you haven't actually read the Bible.

some tosh from the kjv1611 collected fairy tales

But the REAL Holy Scriptures of God state (as I have already pointed out)

The Random Number of Not Commandments, Suggestions:

3. Judge not, for verily it be not thine job neither most likely to be thine business.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Hey there.

My favorite bible quote is "Judge not lest ye be judged," from the book of Matthew. I especially love it because it shows the heart of Christianity: acceptance. Anyways... Hi!

I see you haven't actually read the Bible.

Matthew 7: 1-5

1 Judge not, that ye be not judged.

2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.

3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?

4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?

5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.

What you are referencing is not a commandment not to judge, but an admonishment against hypocritical judgment.

[Thicklette]

Re: Hey there.

Hi there, the people @ this church can be rude if u r different. Don't let them get u down

[James Hutchins]

Re: Hey there.

Why do you think bastards can't find your god? It's not their fault they were born. Are you telling me that your god is an asshole who sends people to hell for the sins of others?

Short bus ride today, eh Nick?

Anyone can find God. He is always right next to you on your left side. Usually patiently watching over your every action, monitoring your every word.
For those that refuse to accept Jesus Christ into their lives, he stands there silently, occasionally laughing at the non-believers errors. For those that are True Christians(tm), he often catches our errors and resolves them right before out eyes. He whispers into our ears, providing dead on balls accurate advice.
And yes, God does bestow unfortunate 'luck' on some, solely to punish another. As precious as life is, to God we are merely one in a trillion and a few disposables is nothing. But a good lesson is priceless.

Whats the matter Nick, born with baby arms? Or is your mother a prostitute and only knows your father was some Somali cargo ship deckhand she met in Thailand?

[Sister Charli]

Re: Hey there.

I'm new here. I heard everyone here is really accepting and I can't wait to talk with you all. I should let you know I am transgendered

So are you sitting at your keyboard wearing stilettos, frilly undies and fishnets as you type?

Deuteronomy 22:5 (King James Version)
5 The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hey there.

I'm new here. I heard everyone here is really accepting and I can't wait to talk with you all. I should let you know I am transgendered (Not using my real name, it's habit of mine on forums)... and my parents are not married.

My favorite bible quote is "Judge not lest ye be judged," from the book of Matthew. I especially love it because it shows the heart of Christianity: acceptance. Anyways... Hi!

An introduction generally involves you telling us about yourself. How old are you? What church do you attend? Why have you chosen to be a pervert instead of worshiping Jesus properly?

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Hey there.

Why do you think bastards can't find your god? It's not their fault they were born. Are you telling me that your god is an asshole who sends people to hell for the sins of others?

Nick, why are you so filled with rage, don't blame God for the indiscretions of your parents. Did I say that Jesus could not love you? He can and will, it is not his fault you can not go to church. You should direct your hate towards your parents not Jesus.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Hey there.

Nobody wants to talk to you, spaghetti worshipper, go away.

[Nicholas Trano]

Re: Hey there.

Why do you think bastards can't find your god? It's not their fault they were born. Are you telling me that your god is an asshole who sends people to hell for the sins of others?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hey there.

I am not saying you should hide anything, what I am saying there is a place for everything, right now you have come to a True Christian Forum to discuss things Christian and in all my readings I have never found the perfect lasagna recipe in the Bible!

Two points.

Firstly,
If such a thing existed it would not be in the kjv1611 collected fairy tales.

Secondly,
Such a thing does not exist as the scriptures tell us
The Random Number of Not Commandments, Suggestions:

12. Thou ought beware those who claim to have achieved Noodly Perfection, for they are False Chefs whose claims of the Perfect Recipe will lead thee astray.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Hey there.

If your god is perfect, why should you hide dissent? Let anyone see both sides and they'll definitely see that your fairy tails are truth.

Why are you here? Who let you in?
Deuteronomy 23:2



A bastard shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD; even to his tenth generation shall he not enter into the congregation of the LORD.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Hey there.

I am not saying you should hide anything, what I am saying there is a place for everything, right now you have come to a True Christian Forum to discuss things Christian and in all my readings I have never found the perfect lasagna recipe in the Bible!

[Nicholas Trano]

Re: Hey there.

If your god is perfect, why should you hide dissent? Let anyone see both sides and they'll definitely see that your fairy tails are truth.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Hey there.

He did not come here as a Pastafarian but after comparing the advice given to him by both religions it appears he has now become one. I must thank your fellow "true christians" for helping me lead to the TRUTH that is The Flying Spaghetti Monster.

we are her to serve you pasta boy...I hope they ban you this time!

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Hey there.

@ Mr. Tranny

It is customary among civilized peoples to introduce oneself. Please refrain from your foul brand of spaghetti worshipping blasphemy on our Godly message board.

He did not come here as a Pastafarian but after comparing the advice given to him by both religions it appears he has now become one. I must thank your fellow "true christians" for helping me lead to the TRUTH that is The Flying Spaghetti Monster.