Hello, My name is topher

[Topher]

Thanks for allowing me to register to your website, it is a blessing and a breath of fresh air. Right, now for the rest of the introduction. I'm going to start with the last two parts of the introduction by saying that my favorite passage is Ezekiel 25:17. Now I know that this has been used by a 'cult' movie (as mangled as it was) but it was this verse that made me look at my life and find my true path. Okay now for the hard bit I suppose, I don't actually go to Church but I have what I feel is a good reason for that being that i have not found one that I feel allows me to further my purpose. Unfortunately the elder members of my community, some of whom attended the Church in my area and who taught at my school were drug takers and were convicted of this only three years ago, despite many warnings from the youth in my area who were held victim by them over the past twenty years, so I do not attend the local 'religious ceremonies' as I feel that they would only pollute my faith as those who attend still defend the actions of these sinners. So I spend my Sundays alone contemplating what I now know to be the truth. Thank you for your time and I look forward to your guidance and reading your advice.

[WinnerNotSinner]

Re: Hello, My name is topher

Welcome Topher Praise Jesus you found us when you did!

Ezekiel 25:17 is one of my favourites as well;
And I will execute great vengeance upon them with furious rebukes; and they shall know that I am the LORD, when I shall lay my vengeance upon them.

Always brings a tear to my eye.

Are you sure you cannot find a local Baptist church not run by drug addicts? I used Google-maps to find mine, and although I travel 25 miles every day to visit, it is worth it.

So... How old are you? Are you a man or woman? What Bible do you use? Are you married? How many sons have you bore for the LORD?

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Hello, My name is topher

You say that the congregation of your local Church are all middle age drug abusers? Where do you live? I believe Sodom AND Gomorrah were both destroyed years ago.
Tell me something about your Baptism, I love stories about Baptisms!

[Topher]

Re: Hello, My name is topher

Well okay, I have to start by saying that unfortunately I have found that most of the Churches in my area that I have visited have all taken a sliding approach to the the one true word. They seem, to me, to let certain things slide in order to simply boost their numbers, they have seemed to succumb to the cult of personality as opposed to preaching the truth. Also let me say that not everyone at the Church are middle aged drug takers, if I made that impression I apologize. The fault that I have found is that they are sympathetic to people who are, they have a level of tolerance that I feel perverts what they say is faith and I find that voicing my opinion of this fact merely aggravates these people. There are people who are willing to listen but to worship with others who are not would be polluting what I see as the truth. So I practice patience and abstain from needlessly provoking those who are not willing to listen or accept reason. Yes you are right that I could find a Church, and I probably will, but I haven't found one yet.

I am 38 years old and I have only had one son Philip (15 years old) with my wife Christina but unfortunately she is no longer with me as she died from a drug overdose which in some ways brings me to my baptism and the reason why I can't tolerate the dilution of words that pollute an ideal. You see people will say anything to get you to see their way regardless and make up any number of facts to 'prove' how right they are but unless they are willing then there is no saving them. Sadly I found out this the hard way.

Like I said my favorite passage is the one that struck me first, Ezekiel 25:17, despite it's medium, because the character made me realize that I needed to accept that there was something more than what I was seeing at the time. I don't know if either of you gentlemen were ever unable to see the good that is life, but for a while I couldn't.

All I could see was that which was told me that life is for living and that there is only the here and now so you better make as much money and horde as many riches as you can and as much as I did what was 'required' of me I felt empty, there had to be something more because if there wasn't, then what was the point? And in my emptiness I followed trends and listened to the words of people who were supposedly the pinnacles of our society, such as the famous or prestigious and tried to see what they said was good and as a result saw some movies that were supposedly art but really just a means to shock and strangely that led me to see 'Pulp Fiction'. It was 12/ 08/ 99, I'll never forget it.

The first thing that struck me was that one of characters, a gangster, had sold his soul to the devil and deposited in a suit case and he wanted it back and it didn't matter if he had to commit horrible crimes he wanted it back, regardless of the consequences, for what is there that is worth fighting for if not your soul. But at the end of the movie there is a scene in a diner where two lost souls make a decision on just a moments notice to commit a robbery and it just so happens that in this diner is another gangster who has retrieved the soul that was in the suitcase and who had just had his own moment of redemption. And when push came to shove, with a gun in his face, he refused to give this 'want to be' robber the suitcase. The reason for this I think is because he knew that because he had given his word that he would retrieve it for this other man, despite this other man's corruption, that to simply give it up when things got too hard would not only mean that he had broken his word but lost his soul just when he realized what he had to do in order to redeem it.

Now when I have told others this they have doubted me but it is with the utmost conviction that i say that it is true it was my moment of clarity if you will. You see at that moment, like the glow of that lost soul in the suitcase, the sky over the hills that surround the lake that I can see from my lounge-room window seemed to glow a bright orange and the clouds took on a golden hue and for a moment everything just stopped. There had been a storm raging. There wasn't a sound, I couldn't hear rain or thunder not a rustle of trees in the wind or branches creaking like they do, nothing. It was the longest single moment that I have ever had, didn't even feel like I needed to breathe before it all folded in on me. I knew then that I was wasting my gift and that's when I decided enough was enough, I had let people get away with things long enough and through my faults I had suffered and I deserved it. I had turned a blind eye and my wife was lost. I failed to hear the truth and nearly lost my way completely to greed and I didn't have the right to do that because Philip, my son, was depending on me. I couldn't let him just wonder through life aimless and lose himself to temptation, regardless of the decisions that I have made and how I suffer or may suffer in this life or the next it is my duty to help him find the right path.

You see I don't know if I am redeemable, I may have made too many mistakes, committed too many sins but to paraphrase the quote that struck me from the movie 'I'm trying, brother, I'm trying!' and there's no way I'm going to let my son's soul get lost just because the challenge before me seemed too hard because there is something else, of this I am sure, and although I may have been lost, I will do my best to make sure that my son is not.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Hello, My name is topher

Well Topher, it sounds to me like you are trying to walk with Christ. I hope you find a good Baptist church where you can settle down and meet a good woman to put out some more Soldiers for Christ before it is too late. In the meantime, raising your son to be a Warrior for the Lord is your best bet. Glad you are keeping spirituality in mind as you reach your life decisions. God Bless You, Topher. And my Christ keep you always in His ample bosom.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Hello, My name is topher

Topher-
I would like to comment on your description of the church goers you were dealing with. We call them cafeteria Christians. They go through the bible and think '''mmm that looks good'' or ''I can do that without any effort''. They pick and choose what they like and then they turn around and tell you that theirs is the way. Wrong! The way of the lord is written in the Bible, all the Bible not just the New Testament. Not just john 3.16 but 3.17-20 as well.

For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved

He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.

And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.

For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved.

Jesus didn't die (temporarily) for everybody only those who accept him and lives by his word.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Hello, My name is topher

Topher, can I call you toppy? Top!

Toppy, can you maybe summarize what you want for us in one or two sentences?