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  • SheepOfGod
    Forum Member
    Forum Member
    • Oct 2010
    • 119

    #1

    Good to meet you true Chirstians

    I'm so glad I found this place; I can really relate to you guys.

    Let me tell you about my self: I love my family, God, Jesus, and church. I hate athiests, fags, scientists and all other hellbound sinners.
    GOD HATE FAGS
    Athiesm is a form of mental illness that should be treated immediately.
  • brother johnII
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    • Oct 2010
    • 25

    #2
    Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

    we True Christians™ welcome you to Landover Baptist Church..
    keep the bible close to your heart and you shall find what you seek.

    Matthew 7:11

    7 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: 8 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. 9 Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? 10 Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? 11 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?

    Comment

    • Levi Jones
      Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
      Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
      Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
       
      • Jul 2009
      • 13930

      #3
      Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

      Originally posted by SheepOfGod View Post
      I'm so glad I found this place; I can really relate to you guys.

      Let me tell you about my self: I love my family, God, Jesus, and church. I hate athiests, fags, scientists and all other hellbound sinners.
      Amen and welcome.

      What church do you attend? What are your favorite Bible verses?
      Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

      Comment

      • Billy Bob Jenkins
        Family Man of the Year 2010-2013
        About as Straight and Manly as you can get
        Hates anal sex. And trees.
        True Christian™
        • May 2010
        • 8337

        #4
        Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

        Originally posted by SheepOfGod View Post
        I'm so glad I found this place; I can really relate to you guys.

        Let me tell you about my self: I love my family, God, Jesus, and church. I hate athiests, fags, scientists and all other hellbound sinners.
        Welcome! It sounds like you have a pretty goo head on your shoulders. Let me ask you: are you a male or a female? Married? Have you any sons?
        The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!

        Comment

        • landoverlover
          Also loves Jesus and America
          True Christian™
          • Jul 2010
          • 828

          #5
          Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

          Originally posted by brother johnII View Post
          we True Christians™ welcome you to Landover Baptist Church..
          keep the bible close to your heart and you shall find what you seek.

          Matthew 7:11

          7 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: 8 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. 9 Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? 10 Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? 11 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?
          "brother" - I have to ask why you are calling yourself a True Christian™.

          I see that our Godly Pastors have determined that so far you are a sinner on the fast track to hell. Earning the True Christian™ honorific can take years of prayer and study - and even after all that one may not have what it takes.

          I suggest that while on this site you confine yourself to what you have earned. I will pray that someday you may join our ranks, God and our Pastors willing.
          Leviticus 13:44 He is a leprous man, he is UNCLEAN: the priest shall pronounce him utterly UNCLEAN; his plague is in his head.

          2 Kings 6:25 And there was a great famine in Samaria: and, behold, they besieged it, until an ass's head was sold for fourscore pieces of silver, and the fourth part of a cab of dove's dung for five pieces of silver.



          King James Bible v1611

          Good Enough For JESUS....Good Enough For Me !!

          sigpic

          Comment

          • handmaiden
            Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
            True Christian™
            • May 2010
            • 11432

            #6
            Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

            Originally posted by landoverlover View Post
            "brother" - I have to ask why you are calling yourself a True Christian™.
            I would like to second what my brother in Christ has said. We didn't go through the trouble of getting the term trademarked just so every Tom, Dick and Johnny could claim it for their own.

            And what's with the JohnII, anyway? The use of roman numerals has a papist taint, if you ask me . . .

            Quick quiz-- What color does the Blessed Virgin Mary wear?



            Suspiciously Yours,

            Handmaiden
            His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

            Guns For God and the Economy

            Comment

            • SheepOfGod
              Forum Member
              Forum Member
              • Oct 2010
              • 119

              #7
              Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

              She wears a robe of white and blue. The white symbolizes her verginity and purity while the blue symbolizes her role as queen of Heaven and earth.
              GOD HATE FAGS
              Athiesm is a form of mental illness that should be treated immediately.

              Comment

              • Pastor Ezekiel
                Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                 
                • Sep 2006
                • 78556

                #8
                Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

                Originally posted by SheepOfGod View Post
                I'm so glad I found this place; I can really relate to you guys.

                Let me tell you about my self: I love my family, God, Jesus, and church. I hate athiests, fags, scientists and all other hellbound sinners.
                You're supposed to introduce yourself.

                Please tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

                If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

                If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

                You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

                Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
                Who Will Jesus Damn?

                Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                Comment

                • handmaiden
                  Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
                  True Christian™
                  • May 2010
                  • 11432

                  #9
                  Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

                  Originally posted by SheepOfGod View Post
                  She wears a robe of white and blue. The white symbolizes her verginity and purity while the blue symbolizes her role as queen of Heaven and earth.
                  Well, we know you to be a Mary -worshipping idolator. Begone from the company of those who seek the words of the Bible. Surely there is a pedophile priest to whom you could be "confessing".



                  Rebukingly Yours,

                  Handmaiden
                  His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

                  Guns For God and the Economy

                  Comment

                  • Jo Freddie
                    Unsaved trash
                    Hateful God mocking pirate
                    • Apr 2009
                    • 6339

                    #10
                    Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

                    Originally posted by handmaiden View Post
                    Well, we know you to be a Mary -worshipping idolator. Begone from the company of those who seek the words of the Bible. Surely there is a pedophile priest to whom you could be "confessing".



                    Rebukingly Yours,

                    Handmaiden
                    Mien handy, aren't you the Papist Finder General!
                    Posted via Pasta

                    True Pastafarian™

                    May my Sauce be with you!
                    Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
                    Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
                    The Loose Canon - HTML version
                    Loose Canon Fan Page
                    North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
                    I have been to The Volcano!

                    Comment

                    • SheepOfGod
                      Forum Member
                      Forum Member
                      • Oct 2010
                      • 119

                      #11
                      Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

                      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                      You're supposed to introduce yourself.

                      Please tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

                      If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

                      If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

                      You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

                      Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
                      I'm really sorry; allow me to formaly apologise for my misguided actions.

                      Well anyway I go to the Central Cross Baptist Church in Florida. I have always been with Jesus since the first day of my life. My parents are very devout lover of Jesus. I praise God that he alowed my soulto be born into such an amazing family.

                      Right now I am unmaired and don't have kids yet. I'm to find a nice TC girl some day.

                      God Bless
                      GOD HATE FAGS
                      Athiesm is a form of mental illness that should be treated immediately.

                      Comment

                      • handmaiden
                        Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
                        True Christian™
                        • May 2010
                        • 11432

                        #12
                        Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

                        Originally posted by SheepOfGod View Post
                        I'm really sorry; allow me to formaly apologise for my misguided actions.

                        Well anyway I go to the Central Cross Baptist Church in Florida. I have always been with Jesus since the first day of my life. My parents are very devout lover of Jesus. I praise God that he alowed my soulto be born into such an amazing family.

                        Right now I am unmaired and don't have kids yet. I'm to find a nice TC girl some day.

                        God Bless
                        No Baptist worth his leather bound Bible would call Mary the Queen of Heaven.


                        Shrewdly Yours,

                        Handmaiden
                        His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

                        Guns For God and the Economy

                        Comment

                        • Jo Freddie
                          Unsaved trash
                          Hateful God mocking pirate
                          • Apr 2009
                          • 6339

                          #13
                          Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

                          Originally posted by handmaiden View Post
                          No Baptist worth his leather bound Bible would call Mary the Queen of Heaven.


                          Shrewdly Yours,

                          Handmaiden
                          You tell 'em Mrs Scrubbitt
                          Posted via Pasta

                          True Pastafarian™

                          May my Sauce be with you!
                          Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
                          Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
                          The Loose Canon - HTML version
                          Loose Canon Fan Page
                          North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
                          I have been to The Volcano!

                          Comment

                          • SheepOfGod
                            Forum Member
                            Forum Member
                            • Oct 2010
                            • 119

                            #14
                            Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

                            Originally posted by handmaiden View Post
                            No Baptist worth his leather bound Bible would call Mary the Queen of Heaven.


                            Shrewdly Yours,

                            Handmaiden
                            I have a confession; I have not been 100% honest with you people. Me and my family used to go to a catholic church and just recently started goin to a Baptist church because we had an awakening to the true path. We are still learning what it really means to be a Baptist. One of the reasons I joined this forum is to help educate my self everthing there is to knowabout the KJV 1611 bible.

                            Handmaiden will you forgive his sheep for his past sins?
                            GOD HATE FAGS
                            Athiesm is a form of mental illness that should be treated immediately.

                            Comment

                            • Pastor Ezekiel
                              Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                               
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 78556

                              #15
                              Re: Good to meet you true Chirstians

                              Originally posted by SheepOfGod View Post
                              I have a confession; I have not been 100% honest with you people. Me and my family used to go to a catholic church and just recently started goin to a Baptist church because we had an awakening to the true path. We are still learning what it really means to be a Baptist. One of the reasons I joined this forum is to help educate my self everthing there is to knowabout the KJV 1611 bible.

                              Handmaiden will you forgive his sheep for his past sins?
                              How old are you? What is your name?
                              Who Will Jesus Damn?

                              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                              Comment

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