X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • Sam_the_saved
    Forum Member
    Forum Member
    • Dec 2010
    • 19

    #1

    Born Again, Hi!

    Hi, I'm Samuel!

    I'm a young man ready, willing and able to devote my life to Christ.

    Sadly this was not always the case. Long before I saw the light I was involved in a terrible series of events that involved treachery, Godlessness and escaping from a Taiwanese prison during a monsoon, but lets not waste time talking about it now.

    Those days, thanks to the Lord, are long behind, and I can only pray that they are forgiven in time. Until then, I punish myself for my sins nightly, and make sure to pray that the people I hurt live long, wholesome lives and never find me.

    It's nice to meet you all and I hope I fit right in.
    Jesus is the only way to salvation.
    This has been proven by christian scientists time and time again.
    So called "Atheists" who choose to ignore these facts are knowingly allowing themselves into Satans grasp, and are the most likely to turn to muslimage.
    I strongly believe in the death penalty, for all known Atheists.
  • Cranky Old Man
    Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
    You kids get off his lawn!
     
    • Jan 2010
    • 22371

    #2
    Re: Born Again, Hi!

    Welcome to our friendly family forum!

    How exactly do you punish yourself?
    5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
    To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
    James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

    Comment

    • Sam_the_saved
      Forum Member
      Forum Member
      • Dec 2010
      • 19

      #3
      Re: Born Again, Hi!

      Originally posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
      Welcome to our friendly family forum!

      How exactly do you punish yourself?
      Thank you very much.

      I flagellate myself with a knot-tailed whip, typically twenty times an evening. I used to do many, many more however I was told by several allegedly "holy" men that self-flagellation was neither needed nor accepted by God. However as it remains highly possible that these men were nothing but false-Christians seeking to deceive me I have not entirely discontinued the practice.
      Jesus is the only way to salvation.
      This has been proven by christian scientists time and time again.
      So called "Atheists" who choose to ignore these facts are knowingly allowing themselves into Satans grasp, and are the most likely to turn to muslimage.
      I strongly believe in the death penalty, for all known Atheists.

      Comment

      • Lycia The Repentant
        Ex-prostitute on her knees for the Lord
        Now that she's Saved©, Priceless
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2010
        • 2019

        #4
        Re: Born Again, Hi!

        Hi Sam, welcome!

        I spoke with you a bit in a different thread, but allow me to extend an official "hello".

        You can find a copy of the KJV Bible online here.

        So tell us a little bit more about yourself. Have you found a suitable church since finding Jesus? What's your favorite Bible verse? Have any sons yet?
        "Whether of them twain did the will of his father? They say unto him, The first. Jesus saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That the publicans and the harlots go into the kingdom of God before you. For John came unto you in the way of righteousness, and ye believed him not: but the publicans and the harlots believed him: and ye, when ye had seen it, repented not afterward, that ye might believe him." Matthew 21:31-32

        An Important Reminder for all unSaved© Ladies
        Protect Yourself! Important Information about Demons
        My five Six Step Guide to Stopping Your Miserable Harlotry!
        Do you hate fornication? Join the Junior Anti-Sex League and help stop it today!
        An Open Question to All false christians.

        Comment

        • Adilene
          Forum Member
          Forum Member
          • Dec 2010
          • 332

          #5
          Re: Born Again, Hi!

          Originally posted by Sam_the_saved View Post
          Hi, I'm Samuel!

          I'm a young man ready, willing and able to devote my life to Christ.

          Sadly this was not always the case. Long before I saw the light I was involved in a terrible series of events that involved treachery, Godlessness and escaping from a Taiwanese prison during a monsoon, but lets not waste time talking about it now.

          Those days, thanks to the Lord, are long behind, and I can only pray that they are forgiven in time. Until then, I punish myself for my sins nightly, and make sure to pray that the people I hurt live long, wholesome lives and never find me.

          It's nice to meet you all and I hope I fit right in.
          Hello! Welcome! It's nice to meet you. I'm Adilene.


          “By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God, and keep his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments: and his commandments are not grievous.” – 1 John 5:2-3

          Comment

          • Sam_the_saved
            Forum Member
            Forum Member
            • Dec 2010
            • 19

            #6
            Re: Born Again, Hi!

            Originally posted by Lycia The Repentant View Post
            Hi Sam, welcome!

            I spoke with you a bit in a different thread, but allow me to extend an official "hello".

            You can find a copy of the KJV Bible online here.

            So tell us a little bit more about yourself. Have you found a suitable church since finding Jesus? What's your favorite Bible verse? Have any sons yet?
            "He is the chief of the ways of God: he that made him can make his sword to approach unto him."
            Job 19

            The Book of Job is the text through which the Lord first spoke to me, and this verse truly shows the power He has over His creations, even the Behemoth.

            Sadly I have only recently found God and he has yet to guide me to a suitable church. Perhaps, if I am not too bold to ask, you may point me in the right direction? I would be most grateful, as I already am for your link to the KJV Bible and again I thank you.

            Since finding Jesus I have been blessed with no sons, although given my behaviour in my previous lifestyle it is not impossible that several already existt hough I have met none.
            Last edited by Sam_the_saved; 12-16-2010, 12:46 AM. Reason: Replaced "Book" with "Text"
            Jesus is the only way to salvation.
            This has been proven by christian scientists time and time again.
            So called "Atheists" who choose to ignore these facts are knowingly allowing themselves into Satans grasp, and are the most likely to turn to muslimage.
            I strongly believe in the death penalty, for all known Atheists.

            Comment

            • Sam_the_saved
              Forum Member
              Forum Member
              • Dec 2010
              • 19

              #7
              Re: Born Again, Hi!

              Originally posted by Lycia The Repentant View Post
              Hi Sam, welcome!

              I spoke with you a bit in a different thread, but allow me to extend an official "hello".

              You can find a copy of the KJV Bible online here.

              So tell us a little bit more about yourself. Have you found a suitable church since finding Jesus? What's your favorite Bible verse? Have any sons yet?
              It is charming to meet you, Adilene. God bless.
              Jesus is the only way to salvation.
              This has been proven by christian scientists time and time again.
              So called "Atheists" who choose to ignore these facts are knowingly allowing themselves into Satans grasp, and are the most likely to turn to muslimage.
              I strongly believe in the death penalty, for all known Atheists.

              Comment

              • Yea-tho-we-walk
                Forum Member
                Forum Member
                • Nov 2010
                • 390

                #8
                Re: Born Again, Hi!

                Originally posted by Sam_the_saved View Post
                Thank you very much.

                I flagellate myself with a knot-tailed whip, typically twenty times an evening. I used to do many, many more however I was told by several allegedly "holy" men that self-flagellation was neither needed nor accepted by God. However as it remains highly possible that these men were nothing but false-Christians seeking to deceive me I have not entirely discontinued the practice.
                Samuel, before 1611 flagellation was acceptable to apease the Lord. If you still feel the need to severly punish yourself, it is now proper to turn your television on the 'Hallmark' station, remove the channel knob and burn it along with your remote. When the Lord catches a whiff of the burning Satanic items from his cloud of glory, he will squeal with delight! Glory!

                Comment

                • James Hutchins
                  True Christian™
                  Just a Regular Nice Guy
                   
                  • Jun 2009
                  • 29453

                  #9
                  Re: Born Again, Hi!

                  Sam, it is nice to hear you punish yourself, saving God the trouble. I hope you have saved photographic proof of your flagellation sessions to remind yourself of the kind of sinner you are. Perhaps one day we can share pictures and discuss our sins. Getting things out in the open and lending a hand to a fellow Christian is always a good release for the soul.

                  I use one of these when I am just too taired after a day of minding the field workers
                  Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                  Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                  Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                  Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                  Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                  Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                  Comment

                  • Mistress Cookie
                    Petite pearl of Baptist womanhood
                    True Christian™
                    • Jul 2008
                    • 6790

                    #10
                    Re: Born Again, Hi!

                    Originally posted by Sam_the_saved View Post
                    Hi, I'm Samuel!

                    I'm a young man ready, willing and able to devote my life to Christ.
                    PRAISE!

                    In a time when we are seeing more and more of our Young People being Tempted from the Path, here is One who Says, "I Am Yours, Sweet Jesus!"

                    Your post has "made my day", Samuel. It makes all the work we do here feel worthwhile.

                    I am glad we could lead you to Jesus™

                    Comment

                    • Sam_the_saved
                      Forum Member
                      Forum Member
                      • Dec 2010
                      • 19

                      #11
                      Re: Born Again, Hi!

                      Originally posted by James Hutchins View Post
                      Sam, it is nice to hear you punish yourself, saving God the trouble. I hope you have saved photographic proof of your flagellation sessions to remind yourself of the kind of sinner you are. Perhaps one day we can share pictures and discuss our sins. Getting things out in the open and lending a hand to a fellow Christian is always a good release for the soul.

                      I use one of these when I am just too taired after a day of minding the field workers
                      I cannot express my gratitude at you showing my this. I have ordered one just now and eagerly await being able to punish myself under His watchful eye without the tedious stress and arm pain that I used to get.

                      Following my use of this holy contraption I shall promptly and happily share with you photographs of my wounds. Of course due to blood loss I tend to lose the ability to move for some time afterwards, so they may be belated pictures I am afraid.
                      Jesus is the only way to salvation.
                      This has been proven by christian scientists time and time again.
                      So called "Atheists" who choose to ignore these facts are knowingly allowing themselves into Satans grasp, and are the most likely to turn to muslimage.
                      I strongly believe in the death penalty, for all known Atheists.

                      Comment

                      • Bible Student
                        Master of Biblical Study and Ancient Languages
                        With Jesus now.
                        True Christian™
                        • Dec 2010
                        • 2474

                        #12
                        Re: Born Again, Hi!

                        Originally posted by Sam_the_saved View Post
                        I cannot express my gratitude at you showing my this. I have ordered one just now and eagerly await being able to punish myself under His watchful eye without the tedious stress and arm pain that I used to get.

                        Following my use of this holy contraption I shall promptly and happily share with you photographs of my wounds. Of course due to blood loss I tend to lose the ability to move for some time afterwards, so they may be belated pictures I am afraid.
                        In your eagerness to obtain ecstasy through flagellation, please make sure you do not hurt yourself to the extent you can no longer study your 1611 King James Bible nor pray for a couple hours a day while kneeling with pea under each knee.
                        YiJC, BS

                        II Peter 1:4 -- Whereby are giuen vnto vs exceeding great and precious promises, that by these you might bee partakers of thy diuine nature, hauing escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

                        Comment

                        Working...