Safe back home from the darkest places on Earth!

[Rev. Ferd Messer]

Yeah and verily I say unto thee my brethren in JESUS, the past 7 years I have been doing missionary work in the wilds of Africa. As commanded by the LORD Himself, I spread the Word throughout every village I found baptizing many in JESUS' name and, as HE commanded, begetting many mullato warriors of CHRIST. Often was I threatened by Godless, unkempt heathen who with their Satanic scimatars and the mark of the BEAST itSelf upon their hands and brows did threaten to kill me if I continued to preach the Word and beget ever more warriors of Christ. However I persisted as I wished ONLY to please and serve the LORD. More than once was I cast out as carried out my calling but finally the LORD spake to me and called me to travel to a new land of sin and Godlessness - Los Angeles, California. Already I have been offered money and fame by Hellbound homosexuals if I would but let them spread their demonic juices on me but I refused knowing it is better to go hungry than to spend eternity in the lake of unquenchable fire as I was guided by the Word of the LORD. PRAISE JESUS!!!

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Safe back home from the darkest places on Earth!

Welcome to our friendly forum!

How many towel heads did you kill for America?

[Rev. Ferd Messer]

Re: Safe back home from the darkest places on Earth!

Welcome to our friendly forum!

How many towel heads did you kill for America?

As many as my blessed Springfield XD .45 permitted me to what with ammunition being so scarce. (Springfield is not too far from where Rev. Jonathan Edwards was Pastor). I was forced to use several heathen AK-47s as part of the conversion process, many were saved but many others were sent to suffer eternal damnation. PRAISE JESUS!