[Lost Sheep McUinnean]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

You'd think that with all the years I spent as an unsaved piece of trash, I'd be able to at least understand the things they say. Sadly, I can not.

Don't worry. You're not the only one. Thank god for Christian filters.

[fiestagameplayer]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

This is not directed at those of you who have come here with a sincere desire to fellowship with Christians and seek answers to Biblical questions. This is for those of you who think it's funny to come here and try to get a rise out of us.

Just to make your lives easier, here is a form letter you can fill out. Simply fill in the blanks, put a check mark next to the appropriate options, and you'll have your introductory troll post all squared away:


_Hello,
_Namaste,
_Blessed Be,
_Word Up,
_Orale Vato,
_Greetings,

My name is _one you don't NEED to know_ and I am a

_false Christian
_Buddhist
_Wiccan
_Satanist
X "Free Thinker"
_Unitarian
_Mormon
_mormon
_idolator
_homosexual
_drug addict
_hippie
_Lutheran
_European
_"1337 haxxor"
_Methodist
_Feminazi

(check all that apply)

_I attend WHATEVER hillside has the freshest air (enter name of non-existent Church)
_I attend _____________ (enter name of church you found in the Yellow Pages)
X I do not belong to any church or believe in organized religion.
XThe Earth and the trees are my church.


_My favorite Bible verse is IN MY SIG ON THE BOTTOM _ (Copy and paste random verse from NIV Life Application Study Bible)

_I have ??? children. I dunno

I am

_unmarried.
_married to a man.
_married to a woman.
_married to a toaster.
_married to several men.
_married to several women.
_married to several men and women.
_married to several men, women, and toasters.

(check all that apply)

I am here to

_waste your time.
X amuse myself.
_lie to you.
_use circumlocution to obfuscate the fact that I am a moral relativist.
_use misinterpretations of scripture to create the false impression of the Bible contradicting itself.
X horrify you.
_flaunt my gay "lifestyle."
_lead you astray.
_flame you.
_make you feel sorry for me.
X get you all worked up.
_send my unsolicited "dick pics" to Forum Members or True Christians with whom I'd like to have "cyber-sex."

(check all that apply)

When my initial post doesn't get the reaction I was hoping for, I will

X take things up a notch.
_play dumb.
_drop my thin veneer of civility.
_act like a baby.
_copy and paste meaningless garbage from Wikipedia.
_copy and paste meaningless garbage from "scientific" publications.
_get on my high horse.
_say I feel sorry for all of you.
_accuse you of being racists.
_accuse you of being homophobic.
_accuse you of being xenophobic.
_decry your blatant misogyny.
X insist that I understand the Bible better than you.

(check all that apply)


Well there you have it, new trolls. I suppose with all the time this form has saved you, you'll be able to spend more time doing the things that really matter to you, like getting high, downloading pornography, and listening to NPR.

YOU'RE WELCOME!

Pass the herb which comes from the seed ... and get over it if that is a problem for you .... read the Bible!

Gen 1:11 - And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed

[Faith_Machine]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

Welcome, pothead! You do realize you're misinterpreting the Bible, right?

[fiestagameplayer]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

anyone can accuse ... whats your proof?

[Faith_Machine]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

anyone can accuse ... whats your proof?

Friend, the burden of proof is on you. Please use scripture to prove your assertion that God approves of you smoking marijuana.

The fact that degenerate hippies of your ilk happened to adopt the words "grass" and "herb" as slang terms for your drug of choice does not constitute proof.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

Pass the herb which comes from the seed ... and get over it if that is a problem for you .... read the Bible!

That verse could just as easily apply to poison oak or hemlock. Do you smoke that too, fool?

[fiestagameplayer]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

Friend, the burden of proof is on you. Please use scripture to prove your assertion that God approves of you smoking marijuana.

The fact that degenerate hippies of your ilk happened to adopt the words "grass" and "herb" as slang terms for your drug of choice does not constitute proof.

WHAT?? is pot a brick? or granite? or an herb which comes from the seed?

Cheap stunt ... shows you HAVE NO PROOF!!

[fiestagameplayer]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

That verse could just as easily apply to poison oak or hemlock. Do you smoke that too, fool?

where is the proof that tomatoes are alright to consume?

... I say it's better to consume that which comes from the earth than that which comes from man ...

Look at all the poisons which man blindly uses like Humara for Rhumitoid Arthritis - KNOWN SIDE EFFECTS: Various forms of cancer!

.... and unlike those damned hippie types - I do not consume huge amounts (1 or 2 puffs)
I get more intoxicated on a glass of wine

[Faith_Machine]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

WHAT?? is pot a brick? or granite? or an herb which comes from the seed?

Cheap stunt ... shows you HAVE NO PROOF!!

I'll make this easy for your dope-addled mind by bolding and enlarging the relevant part:

Titus 2:11-12

11For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men,

12Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world;

[Faith_Machine]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

Please also refer to the following page:

What Does the Bible Say About Drugs?

(3) JUST BECAUSE SOMETHING IS NATURAL, THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT IT IS GOOD

In my Bible study lessons with different youths at the juvenile facility, eventually someone always brings up a certain verse to try to say that getting high by smoking weed is okay because "the Bible says that God made herb and that it is good." I have even had a couple of teens specifically show me a verse in Genesis to try to justify their getting high. The verse is Genesis 1:11-12, which reads, "And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so. And the earth brought forth grass and herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed was in itself, after his kind: and God saw that it was good."

First of all, the "herb" or "grass" that this verse makes reference to is talking about the plants which are food for man and cattle and other beasts. (Refer to Genesis 1:29-30, Exodus 12:8, Deuteronomy 11:15, 1 Kings 18:5, Proverbs 15:17, Romans 14:2).

Secondly, just because God made something, that does not mean that He wants you to use that thing in a way that would harm yourself or others. God made many mushrooms that spring forth out of the ground and are poisonous. Do you think God wants you to eat these poisonous mushrooms? Are they good for you since God made them? Of course not.

[fiestagameplayer]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

guess what ... BIG PRINT is nice at 1:23am

John 2:10 - And saith unto him, Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse: but thou hast kept the good wine until now.

1Ti 5:23 - Drink no longer water, but use a little wine for thy stomach's sake and thine often infirmities.

[fiestagameplayer]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

Please also refer to the following page:

What Does the Bible Say About Drugs?

where does it say anything about the herbs?

... and tell me you do not use ANY drugs! ... advil, or aspirin? Novocain?

are you suggesting you are more righteous and better than Jesus?

when EVEN He turned water into wine?

[Faith_Machine]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

Why are you here, friend?

We're here to praise Jesus.

[fiestagameplayer]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

Why are you here, friend?

We're here to praise Jesus.

What kind of Jesus act supports foul language?

the Bible tells us

2Th 3:15 - Yet count him not as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother.

Too many people fail to fulling hear some of the teachings while professing to be one with the Word ...

In order to get things said I select places where I can bring light to the short comings of those who have screwed up the world

like the idea of giving healthy people food for free ...

It has led the less motivated down the path to sloth and lazy ways where they involve themselves in gossip and false witnessing.

2Th 3:10 - For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.

Had people been expected to figuratively speaking dance for their dinner
there would have been a lot less crap in the urban area's which has infested the rest of society

All of these problems stem from the loss of PROPER parental control over the children with liberal thinkers like Doctor Spock who was ALMOST right ... yet very wrong

I am the son of a guy who was born in Gleiwitz Germany (the town that is said to be the starting spot of the war at the radio tower) just before WWII

They struggled to come here to the USA ...

Which as my understanding of the Bible indicates was a WRONG thing to do.

When you consider the parable of the Tower of Babel and add a verse like this to the teaching:

Num 36:6 - This is the thing which the LORD doth command concerning the daughters of Zelophehad, saying, Let them marry to whom they think best; only to the family of the tribe of their father shall they marry.

As it looks to me - the world has done wrong for way too many years

... now consider that the Bible also say:

Num 14:18 - The LORD is longsuffering, and of great mercy, forgiving iniquity and transgression, and by no means clearing the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation.

WOW!! by no means clearing the guilty?

AND ---> visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation.

3 and 4 generations?? way too many people of the world are bound to hell! .... because of what?

HOW MANY CHURCHES IN THIS WORLD failed to feed their people the Meat of the Word?

[Faith_Machine]

Re: New Form Letter for Introductory Posts

What kind of Jesus act supports foul language?

Friend, I am trying hard to figure out what you mean by this, or how the rest of your post relates to it, but I am completely at a loss.