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  • James Hutchins
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by EyeoftheStorm View Post
    He's doing a really sweet sport, it's not gay to enjoy health is a sin to make this man unhappy
    A real man does not do a 'sweet sport'.

    Real men hunt, operate heavy equipment, cook meat with fire and watch the big game with other real men.

    Leave a comment:


  • JethroBradeen
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by EyeoftheStorm View Post
    He's doing a really sweet sport, it's not gay to enjoy health is a sin to make this man unhappy
    Might I inquire if English is your first language?

    The ox knoweth his owner, and the ass his master's crib: but Israel doth not know, my people doth not consider.
    ISAIAH 1.3
    Last edited by JethroBradeen; 05-08-2011, 07:28 PM. Reason: Appropriate Bible verse

    Leave a comment:


  • Elias Redfearn
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by EyeoftheStorm View Post
    He's doing a really sweet sport, it's not gay to enjoy health is a sin to make this man unhappy
    This unGodly choice of words sounds rather homosexual to me.

    Leave a comment:


  • EyeoftheStorm
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by Zechariah Smyth View Post
    Well, let's see:

    - weightlifting. Hanging around sweating with a bunch of guy while you try get "buff" and "spot" each other. GAY.

    - rock climbing. Staring at another man's hindquarters while engaging in a totally pointless waste of God's Time. GAY and STUPID.

    - bike riding. I'm guessing you aren't talking about a Harley. GAY.

    I'd be very surprised if you aren't being mounted by some sweaty rock climbing bicyclist this very moment.



    (Leviticus 18:22) "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination."

    Yours in Christ,

    Z. Smyth
    He's doing a really sweet sport, it's not gay to enjoy health is a sin to make this man unhappy

    Leave a comment:


  • JethroBradeen
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by Billy Bob Jenkins View Post
    Welcome to God's Favorite Forum, Jethro. I hope that you will reject the gaydoms of rock climbing and weightlifting and embrace the Lord soon. My only advice is to read the KJV Bible constantly and do absolutely everything it says. Apart from that I have no wisdom whatsoever actually. That being the case, good day.
    Thank you Mr. Billy Bob. With the exception of what you term the "gaydoms: of weightlifting, rock climbing, and bike riding, I think that I cut a fine Christian figure.
    To give you an example, an atheist liberal farts major troll I met on an internet tranquilizer forum accused me of thinking I was superior to the following groups:

    Black people
    Women
    Mexicans
    Latinos,
    Homosexuals
    Liberals
    Northerners
    Artists
    Musicians
    Everyone who isn't a Christian.

    I told him he left out a few:

    Liberal Farts Majors
    Atheists
    Agnostics
    Fat People
    Lazy People
    Ugly People
    Weak People
    Gluttonous People
    Bad Drivers
    People w/ IQ's Less Than 140
    Non-Engineers
    People Who Don't Exercise
    People Who Can't Fix Things
    Short People
    People Who Can't Bench Press 300lbs
    People Who Can't Slam Dunk a Basketball
    People Who*Have a*Vertical Leap Less Than 30"
    People Who Can't Run a Mile w/o Stopping
    People Who Are Scared of Heights
    People Who Think Golf is a Sport
    People Who Always Wash Their Hands
    People Who Think That Going Into the City is Fun
    People who think they are intellectuals*because they are lawyers.
    People who think they are intellectuals because they read useless novels that have nothing to do with anything.
    People who think they are intellectuals because they use big vocabulary words.
    People who think they are intellectuals because they are good at acting.
    People who think they are intellectuals because they go to award winning movies like Broke Back Mountain.* They are given awards by artsy fartsy liberal farts majors.* It's kind of like giving an award to yourself - totally meaningless!
    People who think they are intellectuals because they go to art museums and look*at useless paintings and sculptures done by highly disturbed nuts on drugs.

    That should prove my Holy Christian intentions and bonifides right there!

    Leave a comment:


  • JethroBradeen
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by Youth Minister Harry View Post
    I'm glad you asked. Those sick perverted homoliberal-agenda pushing atheists are hell bent on filling people's heads with lies directly from the cracked lips of satan himself! I personally know some of the fine men being accused of sickness and depravity by those hate-mongers and I can tell you first hand that they are gentle and kind and they LOVE the boys to whom they minister, especially the quiet ones. The quiet ones need extra love. Yes they do. Don't they?

    Having worked with many of the accused men on that website at numerous Bible Camps, Retreats, and Missionary Trips, I can testify that the fellowship we experienced was always a Godly experience. Any boy who has been punished by them has EARNED their discipline. Sometimes the disciplined boys may become angry in later years (after falling out of True Grace) and then try to blame their youth ministers for their OWN sinful disgusting lifestyle choices. As a disciplinarian myself, I can assure you that all teaching methods we've used over the years have been taken DIRECTLY from the Bible!

    Proverbs 22:15 - Foolishnesse is bound in the heart of a child: but the rod of correction shal driue it farre from him.

    As it happens, very few boys who camp with me are spared the rod of correction! Praise God!

    Slippery With The Blood Of Salvation,
    Harry Lester
    Praise Jesus! is good to know that my sons will be under such firm ministration.
    I thank the The Lord Jesus Christ, and the Almighty, and the Holy Spirit every day that there are still good Christian people like you watching over our children, Minister Harry. Those Satan worshipping Darwinists will try to foul the best of intentions. A pox on their house!

    Leave a comment:


  • Youth Minister Harry
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by JethroBradeen View Post
    ...have you ever come across this organization?
    Do you think it is on the up and up?
    I'm glad you asked. Those sick perverted homoliberal-agenda pushing atheists are hell bent on filling people's heads with lies directly from the cracked lips of satan himself! I personally know some of the fine men being accused of sickness and depravity by those hate-mongers and I can tell you first hand that they are gentle and kind and they LOVE the boys to whom they minister, especially the quiet ones. The quiet ones need extra love. Yes they do. Don't they?

    Having worked with many of the accused men on that website at numerous Bible Camps, Retreats, and Missionary Trips, I can testify that the fellowship we experienced was always a Godly experience. Any boy who has been punished by them has EARNED their discipline. Sometimes the disciplined boys may become angry in later years (after falling out of True Grace) and then try to blame their youth ministers for their OWN sinful disgusting lifestyle choices. As a disciplinarian myself, I can assure you that all teaching methods we've used over the years have been taken DIRECTLY from the Bible!

    Proverbs 22:15 - Foolishnesse is bound in the heart of a child: but the rod of correction shal driue it farre from him.

    As it happens, very few boys who camp with me are spared the rod of correction! Praise God!

    Slippery With The Blood Of Salvation,
    Harry Lester

    Leave a comment:


  • JethroBradeen
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by Youth Minister Harry View Post
    Welcome to the Godliest forums on the internet web network! I just know Jesus has led you here with a purpose for your life. You mentioned that you send your boys away to bible School. Being a good southern family, I'd like to invite you to send the boys my way for a summer Bible Retreat. I hope they like RV's! PRAISE JESUS who answers the prayers of the worthy with great bounty!

    Sanctified In The Warm Flowing Blood of Christ Jesus,
    Harry Lester
    Thank you for the kind invitation. I will be sure to tell the boys. Rv's? We don't like them....we l-ov-e them! Being no doubt a stalwart in the Christian Youth Ministry movement, have you ever come across this organization?
    Do you think it is on the up and up?

    Leave a comment:


  • JethroBradeen
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by Holyfield View Post
    You have made me slightly worried. You perform sports where taking performance-inducing drugs is common. Did you give in to temptation? Side-effects of anabolic steriods are among others low self-esteem, anxiety and low sperm count.

    1 Corinthians 3:16-17 "Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are."

    If you are clean that is fine. But seeking help from the medical field is not wrong. A doctor working in occupational medicine can perform a thorough health check, and knows much about hazards at work. A behavioral therapist can help you feel better without your "medication", to which you are obviously addicted.
    Hello Brother Holyfield, and thank you for your thoughts, but please do not worry.My only true addiction is by my bedside always:The King James 1611 Version of the Holy Bible! .
    By the way, has anyone told you you are a dead ringer for the super Godly Charlton Heston,now deceased spokesman for the Godly NRA and the Almighty?
    People do tell me I look like a cross between Our Saviour Jesus Christ Lord and Lamb, and Elvis, the King, but I think it is just those stylist Walmart sun glasses that Sis gave me while visiting the fiery Southwest. (It is a scorcher today!)

    I have never taken non prescription drugs (Too scared!) or steroids, but being a big fan of Arnold Alois Schwarzenegger (the body builder, not the actor or governor) and a somewhat hyperactive individual, my wife and doctors have seen fit to tranquilize me most of my adult Christian life. In fact I rank xanax and lexapro right behind the KJV (1611) as the reasons I am able to lead such a exemplary Christian existence. I do have a Christian therapist who is also my Pastor and an MD. He was, by happenstance, a couch sniffer before finding Jesus.

    Leave a comment:


  • Youth Minister Harry
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Welcome to the Godliest forums on the internet web network! I just know Jesus has led you here with a purpose for your life. You mentioned that you send your boys away to bible School. Being a good southern family, I'd like to invite you to send the boys my way for a summer Bible Retreat. I hope they like RV's! PRAISE JESUS who answers the prayers of the worthy with great bounty!

    Sanctified In The Warm Flowing Blood of Christ Jesus,
    Harry Lester

    Leave a comment:


  • Holyfield
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by JethroBradeen View Post
    I love my job when I am not under psychiatric care, but that is another story.

    I have a long suffering wife, but only three children, I am sorry to say. I don't know why that is exactly but the doc says my sperm count is kind of on the non existent side. He say they looked at it with a microscope and they was all killing one another. Oh,well...

    I am greatly concerned that my favorite
    hobbies, weightlifting, rock climbing, and bike riding might label me as a potential closet homer.
    Originally posted by JethroBradeen View Post
    The Good Lord has blessed me with a strong body, but my mind alas I fear, is weak.

    At the gym they sniggle and call me Reverend Jethro behind my back. Even the homers of which there are many grant me no reprieve. Some time late at night I cry out to the Lord, "Why hast thou forsaken me?" I do feel better after I've taken my medication however.
    You have made me slightly worried. You perform sports where taking performance-inducing drugs is common. Did you give in to temptation? Side-effects of anabolic steriods are among others low self-esteem, anxiety and low sperm count.

    1 Corinthians 3:16-17 "Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are."

    If you are clean that is fine. But seeking help from the medical field is not wrong. A doctor working in occupational medicine can perform a thorough health check, and knows much about hazards at work. A behavioral therapist can help you feel better without your "medication", to which you are obviously addicted.

    Leave a comment:


  • JethroBradeen
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Fabric softener? That sure is white of you Pastor, I'd love to harvest one of them Nogales deers. Are you talking about the two legged or four legged kind?
    It is so the Godly thing to do:

    Genesis 1:26
    "And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth."

    Leave a comment:


  • Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by JethroBradeen View Post
    Well Sis goes to the Cornerstone Baptist Church in Sahuarita (I can't hardly pronounce that wetback name) so I go along. Nice folks with very fair complexions.
    Sour rita? Despite its messican name, it's not an entirely ungodly community as I understand it. Maybe if you are lucky, you'll get to go deer hunting with us at a friend of ours' ranch near Nogales. Big brown deer that smell like fabric softener we hunt down there.

    Leave a comment:


  • Billy Bob Jenkins
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Welcome to God's Favorite Forum, Jethro. I hope that you will reject the gaydoms of rock climbing and weightlifting and embrace the Lord soon. My only advice is to read the KJV Bible constantly and do absolutely everything it says. Apart from that I have no wisdom whatsoever actually. That being the case, good day.

    Leave a comment:


  • JethroBradeen
    replied
    Re: New and concerned...

    Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
    Why are you unsure? You've not immediately asked their pastor the first time you went, if not before?

    How do you know your family isn't being misled by Satan? Sure, the doctrine page looks good overall, but it is up to you as a man to ensure that your silly female relative is not led astray!
    You are quite right Reverend. I have been tardy in my family machinations. Sis is out right now, it being Burritos for Baptists Night at the local Taco Bell on Speedway Blvd. I shall inquire as to her state of purity when she returns.

    Leave a comment:

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