Good afternoon to all

[mcmullanbrush]

Hello

It was a real pleasure to find your excellent forum.
I am mcmullanbrush and I am from Yorkshire, England. I have always been very interested in the bible and hope to further familiarise myself with its contents with your help.

[MisterM]

Re: Good afternoon to all

and hope to further familiarise myself with its contents with your help.

Hello

What is your favorite Bible verse? How many boys have your wife popped out of her tummy? Have you considered writing The Bible with capital letters as it should?

YiC,
Brother Miikkael

[mcmullanbrush]

Re: Good afternoon to all

Hello

What is your favorite Bible verse? How many boys have your wife popped out of her tummy? Have you considered writing The Bible with capital letters as it should?

YiC,
Brother Miikkael

Thank you for your reply Brother Miikkael

I have many favourites, although my current number one has to be Romans 2,6: "Who will render to every man according to his deeds"
My wife has failed to provide me with any sons and I have made my feelings about this known to her.
Please accept my apologies for my typing error. I will ensure I write "The Bible" as it should be in future.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Good afternoon to all

Thank you for your reply Brother Miikkael

I have many favourites, although my current number one has to be Romans 2,6: "Who will render to every man according to his deeds"
My wife has failed to provide me with any sons and I have made my feelings about this known to her.
Please accept my apologies for my typing error. I will ensure I write "The Bible" as it should be in future.

Is your wife aware that she will go to Hell if she doesn't have children?

I Timothy 2
14 And Adam was not deceiued, but the woman being deceiued was in the transgression:
15 Notwithstanding she shall be saued in child-bearing, if they continue in faith and charitie, and holinesse, with sobrietie.
©1611

[mcmullanbrush]

Re: Good afternoon to all

Is your wife aware that she will go to Hell if she doesn't have children?

I Timothy 2
14 And Adam was not deceiued, but the woman being deceiued was in the transgression:
15 Notwithstanding she shall be saued in child-bearing, if they continue in faith and charitie, and holinesse, with sobrietie.
©1611

We have a daughter who is quite tall, will that help?

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: Good afternoon to all

We have a daughter who is quite tall, will that help?

Only if you need something off a high shelf.

Welcome to you too

The best chapters to read depend on what you are looking for. Try The Book of Job, which has always helped me.

Poor advice.

Start at Genesis and end at Revelation. You are looking for Salvation, and you aren't going to find it by picking and choosing.



Your in Christ,

Z. Smyth

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Good afternoon to all

We have a daughter who is quite tall, will that help?

She might need to have children, too. If she doesn't, she will go to Hell. If there have been any illegitimate births in the preceding 10 generations Deuteronomy 23:2 my understanding is that you will all be going to Hell anyway BUT you do need to check with one of the Pastors. There are youth ministers who would be able to instruct your daughter, and there is a european outreach programme - but I'm not sure whether it covers Yorkshire.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Good afternoon to all

Welcome to God's favorite forum. If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Good afternoon to all

Hello I have always been very interested in the bible and hope to further familiarise myself with its contents with your help.

The Word of God can be had for free if you just visit your local Independant Baptist Church and ask the Pastor for one. Make sure you ask specifically for a KJV1611 Authorized Version Bible.

Also you can read one online at www.biblegateway.com. And for your assisted reading pleasure, Brother V has got a wonderful thread going HERE called "Bible in a Year."

[Yea-tho-we-walk]

Re: Good afternoon to all

I was in Yorkshire, England once for a very thorough and lengthy prostrate exam done by a Dr. Mcmullanbrush. Was it you?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Good afternoon to all

You're not one of those door-to-door McMullan Brush salesmen, are you?

The last one I ran into left a very large dent in my right fender.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Good afternoon to all

I have always been very interested in the bible and hope to further familiarise myself with its contents with your help.

Hmmm... Why does this statement not quite ring true?

Please forgive my skepticism friend, but it seems to me that if you'd always been very interested in the Bible, you would already be more than passingly familiar with it at this point.

You're not one of those people who comes here pretending he's not hostile to the Lord's word, just so you can troll us, are you?

God knew you were coming, friend, and He knew what you were planning to pull when you got here. That's why He warned us about you:

2 Corinthians 11:13-15

For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ.

And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light.

Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness; whose end shall be according to their works.

What works are you trying to perpetrate here, and what end do you think they will lead you to?

[mcmullanbrush]

Re: Good afternoon to all

Thank you all for your kind replies, I am alreay feeling warm things inside me

MitzaLizalor, I am not aware of any illegitimate births, but I will try to investigate.

Pastor Ezekiel, Thank you for the welcome, I have already ordered my KJV.

Yea-tho-we-walk, Sadly, it wasn't me, but I do have an Uncle McMullanbrush who is in prison for impersonating a Doctor.

Rev. M. Rodimer, We do not have McMullan brushes in England, my name is purely a coincidence.

Faith_Machine, I fully understand your suspicion and I hope I can prove myself worthy of trust.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Good afternoon to all

Yea-tho-we-walk, Sadly, it wasn't me, but I do have an Uncle McMullanbrush who is in prison for impersonating a Doctor.

You wish you had intimate knowledge of Yea-tho-we-walk's posterior? While I believe such things are a mater of individual choice there are many here who are a little closed minded about such things.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Good afternoon to all

You wish you had intimate knowledge of Yea-tho-we-walk's posterior? While I believe such things are a mater of individual choice there are many here who are a little closed minded about such things.

You're becoming better at spotting perversion and depravity.

There may yet be hope for you, my glycemic load-challenged friend.