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  • Jackie the Scot
    Unsaved trash
    • Jul 2011
    • 1
    #1

    Introduction

    Hello Brothers,

    I found this forum when searching the Internet for true Christians through the masses of non-believers.

    I come from the UK, and believe everything in the name of God, I was born into an atheist family that will never go to heaven, which I have broken free from to pursue my belief in the truth.

    I hope I will be a welcome part of this society of believers.
    Hi trolls, how are you? i'm just here to troll, like a boss.
    BrotherAwesome.
    Tags: None
    • Pastor Ezekiel
      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
       
      • Sep 2006
      • 78556
      #2
      Re: Introduction

      Who's brother are you, Jackie? And what church do you attend over there in Godless Scotland. If you're wearing a dress you'd better be a female.

      If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

      If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

      You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

      Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
      Who Will Jesus Damn?

      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • Zechariah Smyth
          Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
          True Christian™
          • Feb 2011
          • 15251
          #3
          Re: Introduction

          Originally posted by Jackie the Scot View Post
          Hello Brothers,

          I found this forum when searching the Internet for true Christians through the masses of non-believers.

          I come from the UK, and believe everything in the name of God, I was born into an atheist family that will never go to heaven, which I have broken free from to pursue my belief in the truth.

          I hope I will be a welcome part of this society of believers.
          Hi trolls, how are you? i'm just here to troll, like a boss.
          BrotherAwesome.
          Please don't put semi-hidden messages in your posts, young lady.



          Yours in Christ,

          Z. Smyth
          sigpic

            Comment

            • Faith_Machine
              Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
              True Christian™
              • Mar 2011
              • 10050
              #4
              Re: Introduction

              Wow Zechariah, good eyes!
              WARNING:
              In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
              REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                Comment

                • landoverlover
                  Also loves Jesus and America
                  True Christian™
                  • Jul 2010
                  • 828
                  #5
                  Re: Introduction

                  Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
                  Wow Zechariah, good eyes!
                  Indeed, NICE CATCH, Brother. Serves more notice that God will not be mocked.
                  Leviticus 13:44 He is a leprous man, he is UNCLEAN: the priest shall pronounce him utterly UNCLEAN; his plague is in his head.

                  2 Kings 6:25 And there was a great famine in Samaria: and, behold, they besieged it, until an ass's head was sold for fourscore pieces of silver, and the fourth part of a cab of dove's dung for five pieces of silver.



                  King James Bible v1611

                  Good Enough For JESUS....Good Enough For Me !!

                  sigpic

                    Comment

                    • Jedediah
                      True Christian™ Creation Scientist
                      Fisher of Men
                      True Christian™
                      • Feb 2010
                      • 6824
                      #6
                      Re: Introduction

                      So it seems you have come here pretending to be a lost sheep, but in reality, you are a ravening wolf! Do you really have nothing better to do on a Saturday night than to come to a private Christian message board to persecute True Believers?

                      Please be aware that in persecuting us, you only multiply our blessings in Heaven.

                      Matthew 5:10-11
                      Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
                      Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.
                      II Thessalonians 1:7-9
                      And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
                      In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
                      Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power
                      The man who is being progressively sanctified will inescapably sanctify his home, school, politics, economics, science, and all things else by understanding and interpreting all things in terms of the Word of God and by bringing all things under the Dominion of Christ the King. -R.J. Rushdoony

                        Comment

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