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  • Humongous
    Ms. Sham Wow 2011
    Forum Member
    • Apr 2011
    • 263
    #16
    Re: A gentle and humble introduction

    well, welcome to these Godly forums, Sister Mary!

    I look forward to swapping delicious recipes with you. Ifn ya like deep fried Raccoon Rectum I got a few good uns for ya!

    YIC,
    Lori
    Genesis 1:24
    And God said, "Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind: and it was so."

      Comment

      • Dan U. Holier
        True Christian™
        True Christian™
        • Jul 2011
        • 1180
        #17
        Re: A gentle and humble introduction

        Originally posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
        ...But he simply won't take the lead in a Godly disciplinarian way...
        The Godly way for a man is to punish those he loves (as per Hebrews 12:6-8); apparently, your husband doesn’t love you in a proper Christian way. It doesn’t matter that you obviously are an obedient, humble wife; occasional preemptive spanking would prove his True Love®; is this really too much to expect from him? Shame on him!

        Gawd hab mercy!
        Ask not what your Lord can do for you. Ask what you can do for your Lord.


        ... your choice entirely (Matthew 12:30)

          Comment

          • Brother Temperance
            Senior Usher
            True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
            A very nice young man
            True Christian™
            • Sep 2006
            • 15621
            #18
            Re: A gentle and humble introduction

            What are your children's beliefs like? I hate to sound unconventional, but if all else fails, perhaps you could get your oldest male Christian child to beat you, his siblings and his queer dad until a more satisfactory arrangement can be found?
            O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



            God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

              Comment

              • Liam the ex-drunk
                Former Mary Hailer who has seen The Light©
                Forum Member
                • Dec 2010
                • 403
                #19
                Re: A gentle and humble introduction

                Welcome Mary, your introduction was one of the most sincere I have read in a long time. I'm sorry to hear that your husband is such a cruel man, but with prayer the good Lord will change that.

                Please be sure to bring some of your hearty apple pie when you get around to visiting Landover, I would really like a piece of your tasty pie.
                Matthew 10:34
                Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.

                  Comment

                  • s. warnin
                    Forum Member
                    Forum Member
                    • Aug 2011
                    • 168
                    #20
                    Re: A gentle and humble introduction

                    Originally posted by Liam the ex-drunk View Post
                    Welcome Mary, your introduction was one of the most sincere I have read in a long time. I'm sorry to hear that your husband is such a cruel man, but with prayer the good Lord will change that.

                    Please be sure to bring some of your hearty apple pie when you get around to visiting Landover, I would really like a piece of your tasty pie.
                    Oh, I am sure there are many who would love to taste your pie, Mary. Do you have enough to go around?
                    Jeremiah 23:29 Is not my word like as a fire? saith the LORD; and like a hammer that breaketh the rock in pieces?

                    Ephesians 6:11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

                      Comment

                      • Yeshua bar Yusuf
                        Forum Member
                        Forum Member
                        • Sep 2011
                        • 135
                        #21
                        Re: A gentle and humble introduction

                        Welcome to Landover, Sister Mary. May the blessings of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, be on you and your family.

                        It pains me to hear that a good Christian woman such as yourself has been burdened with a monkey worshiping husband. I will pray that my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, will come into your husband and fill him with the power of the Holy Spirit.

                        Like many of the other men here at Landover, I can hardly wait to sample your pie, which I'm certain is warm and moist and sweet.

                        Yours in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ,
                        Yeshua
                        People killed by God in the Bible: 2,476,633
                        People killed by Satan in the Bible: 10
                        Whose side do YOU want to be on?
                        Constantly Praying for Temperance Proverbs 16:24
                        sigpic

                          Comment

                          • Bible Student
                            Master of Biblical Study and Ancient Languages
                            With Jesus now.
                            True Christian™
                            • Dec 2010
                            • 2474
                            #22
                            Re: A gentle and humble introduction

                            Originally posted by Humongous View Post
                            well, welcome to these Godly forums, Sister Mary!

                            I look forward to swapping delicious recipes with you. Ifn ya like deep fried Raccoon Rectum I got a few good uns for ya!

                            YIC,
                            Lori
                            Mary must be absent from the InterWebs else I can't see why she hasn't jumped on your offer of recipe exchange. That deep fried Raccoon Rectum sounds ah er ahem different. Now while we are only one state separated it seems here in northeastern Ohio there is an abject shortage of said raccoon, otherwise I would have the love of my life demand that I get that recipe from you for her. She is an excellent cook and an even better baker.
                            YiJC, BS

                            II Peter 1:4 -- Whereby are giuen vnto vs exceeding great and precious promises, that by these you might bee partakers of thy diuine nature, hauing escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

                              Comment

                              • JustGotSaved
                                True Christian™
                                True Christian™
                                • Aug 2009
                                • 519
                                #23
                                Re: A gentle and humble introduction

                                MMMM. I cant decide which I'd rather see the most:

                                Mary's pie or Lori's rectum.
                                Therefore hath the curse devoured the earth, and they that dwell therein are desolate: therefore the inhabitants of the earth are burned, and few men left. -- Isaiah 24:6 KJV

                                  Comment

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