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  • Stormfront
    Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
    • Feb 2008
    • 22

    #1

    Stormfront

    Hello everyone. My name is Stormfront. I am an ordained Baptist minister and leader of Ex-N.O.R.T.H. (Ex-Negroes Offering Reprimand To Heathens) ministries, a reperation ministry for so-called "gangstas", taking them off the streets and teaching them effective witnessing techniques. You'd be surprised at how cheaply they work, often times for free- if they know their place in the world. I hope to get to know you all very well. I have already pre-registered my son, Billy, for Vacation Bible Gun Camp this summer.

    In Christ,

    Stormfront
  • Nobar King
    Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
    Christ's Guardian
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2007
    • 23748

    #2
    Re: Stormfront

    Best of luck, sir, that battle's going to be hard to fight. Hopefully these hoodlums will see the light of Jesus.
    May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

    Comment

    • Juliette
      True Christian™
      True Christian™
      • Jan 2008
      • 705

      #3
      Re: Stormfront

      Welcome Mr Stormfront!

      That sounds like an excellent idea for the little Billy. You may have him back a little bruised but he'll become a far better soldier for Christ.

      So, what are your favorite bibleverses? (KJV only)


      Comment

      • Mr Godwin
        Forum Member
        Forum Member
        • Dec 2007
        • 123

        #4
        Re: Stormfront

        Originally posted by Stormfront View Post

        Hello everyone. My name is Stormfront. I am an ordained Baptist minister and ...
        Welcome Mr Reverend Stormback. So you're a Baptist minister. Well I'm a Baptist school headmaster, Mr Stormside. We both work with young people. Young people are out of control these days. We educators and pastors have a long row to hoe. So to speak and praise the Lord. One might say we have something in common, Mr Stormtop. What a pleasure. To be sure. I'm looking forward to reading what you have to say on these Godly boards, Mr Stormbottom. The pleasure is mine. So to speak.

        Read your Bible, boys and girls. Jesus likes educated people. That's my take on it.

        Comment

        • Roberta
          Anti La Leche League Organizer
          True Christian™
          • Jan 2008
          • 1817

          #5
          Re: Stormfront



          Are these some of your converts, Pastor Stormfront? I noticed that the boy on the left has a large cross dangling from his neck.

          I will pray for the ongoing success of your vocation.
          Come climb my mountains.

          Comment

          • Sister Noddy
            True Christian™
            True Christian™
            • Jun 2007
            • 1843

            #6
            Re: Stormfront

            Originally posted by Roberta View Post

            I will pray for the ongoing success of your vocation.
            I too shall be praying for Mr Stormaround's ministry with the young people.
            1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
            1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...


            1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...

            Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
            Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...

            Comment

            • Mr Godwin
              Forum Member
              Forum Member
              • Dec 2007
              • 123

              #7
              Re: Stormfront

              Originally posted by Roberta View Post

              Are these some of your converts, Pastor Stormfront? I noticed that the boy on the left has a large cross dangling from his neck.

              I will pray for the ongoing success of your vocation.
              Ahhhh there you are Roberta my dear. The pleasure is mine.

              People like the Reverend Stormcircle are all-around kind of guys who get the job done. I'm impressed. It's impressing, that's what.
              Read your Bible, boys and girls. Jesus likes educated people. That's my take on it.

              Comment

              • Marshall
                Righteous and Patriotic
                Highest body count at the VFW
                True Christian™
                • Oct 2006
                • 3322

                #8
                Re: Stormfront

                I have only seen limited success in transforming coloreds into decent people and that was with the Landover Ex-Negro Ministries(tm). Landover seems to have a monopoly on the techniques required to drive the jigga-Devils out of the typical darky sinner.

                Good luck with your ministry, you'll need it.
                God bless America, the Second Amendment and the Constitution. God bless the United States Marine Corps and all who fight for Jesus in third world cess pools. God bless the GOP and all they stand for, Truth, Honesty and the American people. God bless Landover Baptist Church and all True Christians™ the world over. Curses to our Muslim President, his failure is our Salvation.

                Comment

                • JennyD
                  Honorary True Christian™
                  Sweet Placid Sister
                  Forum Member
                  • Dec 2007
                  • 9567

                  #9
                  Re: Stormfront

                  Mr. Stormfront, I had the pleasure of meeting a Black man named Don who said he was affiliated with a gentleman also named "Stormfront". Don told me he'd been a Wizard of sorts before he was Saved! Might he be one of your converts?
                  www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
                  Huckabee/Palin Gingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!

                  Christian Ladies:
                  Savor your separation in style at the Monthly Visitor!

                  Comment

                  • Pastor Ezekiel
                    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                     
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 78551

                    #10
                    Re: Stormfront

                    Welcome good sir. We are always happy to receive a fellow Baptist, and especially one who works with today's youth. Praise Jesus, He has guided you here for a purpose.

                    Have a look around our Godly forum, and let us know if we can help your ministry.


                    Not with money of course.
                    Who Will Jesus Damn?

                    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                    Comment

                    • Nobar King
                      Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
                      Christ's Guardian
                      True Christian™
                      • Sep 2007
                      • 23748

                      #11
                      Re: Stormfront

                      Maybe we could donate some old belts or some rope scraps for those poor darkies. They need help keeping their pants up.
                      May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

                      Comment

                      • Marshall
                        Righteous and Patriotic
                        Highest body count at the VFW
                        True Christian™
                        • Oct 2006
                        • 3322

                        #12
                        Re: Stormfront

                        Well if this guy can eliminate the primal rape and rob urges that all blacks have built in, then he might be a friend of Landover.

                        He has hit the Godly PayPal hasn't he?
                        God bless America, the Second Amendment and the Constitution. God bless the United States Marine Corps and all who fight for Jesus in third world cess pools. God bless the GOP and all they stand for, Truth, Honesty and the American people. God bless Landover Baptist Church and all True Christians™ the world over. Curses to our Muslim President, his failure is our Salvation.

                        Comment

                        • Juliette
                          True Christian™
                          True Christian™
                          • Jan 2008
                          • 705

                          #13
                          Re: Stormfront

                          Despite our warm welcome Mr Stormfront is little absent on this.


                          Comment

                          • Marshall
                            Righteous and Patriotic
                            Highest body count at the VFW
                            True Christian™
                            • Oct 2006
                            • 3322

                            #14
                            Re: Stormfront

                            I take it he didn't do Jesus a solid and hit the Godly PayPal on his way out?


                            Maybe the blacks had an uprising like that Turner troublemaker and Stormfront is with Jesus now.
                            God bless America, the Second Amendment and the Constitution. God bless the United States Marine Corps and all who fight for Jesus in third world cess pools. God bless the GOP and all they stand for, Truth, Honesty and the American people. God bless Landover Baptist Church and all True Christians™ the world over. Curses to our Muslim President, his failure is our Salvation.

                            Comment

                            • Stormfront
                              Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
                              • Feb 2008
                              • 22

                              #15
                              Re: Stormfront

                              I have been a little absent, haven't I. Some things locally had to be taken care of but I'm still here.

                              Maybe we could donate some old belts or some rope scraps for those poor darkies. They need help keeping their pants up.
                              I'm a step ahead of you. I'm always within (at least) 20 feet of a roll of duct tape, 10 feet of rope, and a loaded shotgun.

                              Comment

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