[Pastor Ed Lowman]

Re: Greetings, all!

No, I just like animals and I feel like volunteering my time

Wayward, troubled girls spend overmuch time with animals. It's a sign of a troubled soul seeking comfort. We'd offer you the solice of the Word of God, but you'd prefer a trailer full of cats. Go ahead, walk away.

Gotta stay away from all of the rude, inconsiderate, mannerless boys around here...

Sinners have such trouble keeping their stories straight. *sigh*

So, you want to be away from us helping your community or because you think we are mannerless and inconsiderate? Don't add lying to your ever-growing tally of transgressions.

Pastor Ed

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Greetings, all!

I'm not saying the Bible is wrong. At all. The Bible is God's word. There is no fighting that truth.

Then you agree that all religions that are not Christianity are false, as the Bible says, and the road to Hell.

I'm glad we agree! You may find your way to Heaven yet!

If you have to think twice about something that could be "questionable," the person should probably walk away. Immediately.
Or you know... they'll get God-nuked.

Could you name someone who has been, as you so adorably put it, "God-nuked" for doing something "questionable"?

Feel free to choose from the below list:

• Jerry Sandusky, rapist of an unknown number of young boys
• Pope Benedict, who knowingly enabled the rapists of thousands of children
• Adolf Hitler, who exterminated thousands of Jews (God's chosen people)
• Osama bin Laden, who masterminded the murder of thousands of civilians for the advance of Islamofascism
• Jeffrey Dahmer, who drugged, raped, murdered, and ate parts of an unknown number of young men before finding Jesus in prison and becoming a born-again Christian and anti-atheism crusader until his untimely demise

Please explain the form of the "God-nuking" which took place, and how it occurred soon enough to prevent any of these five "men" from damaging untold numbers of lives.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Greetings, all!

No, I just like animals and I feel like volunteering my time keeps me out of trouble and helps my community. Gotta stay away from all of the rude, inconsiderate, mannerless boys around here...

I like animals too. I am sure Mrs. Hutchins would appreciate some of your favorite recipes. My favorite is anything deep fried so please be sure to include some of them. I always say, if they are still squirming when you throw them into the pot, they taste better.