[Offcr. Albert Martin]

Re: King James 1611!

Hello, KJV4me, and welcome to the Landover Baptist Church. Please review the following list and tell me which, if any, of the following items you have in your home:

Frogs

Does Kermit the Frog count? I am a BIG Muppets fan.

owls

How about X the Owl? (I'm a HUGE Mr. Rogers fan-LBC doesn't like him because he preached that God loves everyone just the way they are)

hearts

Do images of the Sacred Heart count?

unicorns

All killed in the flood so I guess no.

angels

Frequently mentioned in the Bible as God's messengers. Why do you forbid them, "bible believers"?

dolphins

The Miami Dolphins? My son's a huge fan!

dragons

Not here, but if you find her, tell here where Donkey is.

horseshoes

I have no horses, so no.

items from other countries, especially Africa, China, India, Japan

Guilty as charged. Ya know, God uses them to show His glory (these Japanese inventors have 24th century technology)

American Indian artifacts (dreamcatchers, etc.)

Sometimes my brother has Mass at the Congregation of the Great Spirit Catholic Native American community.

carvings, pictures

What wrong is there in that so long as we don't bow down to or worship them? (We don't pray to the images of Jesus and the saints, but the people they represent).

Buddha statues.

Good Lord no!

Dolls and stuffed animals - dolls originated in voodoo.

They may have originated there, but it doesn't matter what things started as, it's what they are now.

Paisley pattern on anything.

?

Some items of clothing(Nike is a Greek god, according to the dictionary).

History has long forgotten the godess-Nobody believes in her anymore.

Pictures of movie stars/other celebrities

Even the ones who stay faithful to the Lord?

rainbows

Remember the story of Noah's Ark?

some items passed down from ancestors

And what is so evil about ancestors?

shamrocks, clovers or any kind of good luck charm

To me, it's just a symbol of the Trinity-three leaves on the stem, three Persons in one God.

Indian items

Umm, you already said that, didn't you?

any items that are used in witchcraft

None with me, Ma'am!

The Book ofMormon, The Satanic Bible, books on other religions

I have none of these, but I bet you wanted to add "Any Bible other than the KJV1611"...I have almost every other one!

rock and roll music, jazz music, etc.

What is so evil about them by nature? You're not superstitious enough to believe in "evil sounds," are you?

Flamingos

What's so evil about flamingos?

sundials

I'm not technologically impaired-you must be thinking about the Amish.

books/tapes from false (i.e., non-deliverance) faiths

The only tapes I own are by Scott Hahn, Patrick Madrid, Jeff Cavins, Fr. John Corapi and people like them.

ankhs, astrological symbols, peace symbols, tikis

Neither one of them (unless you count the Sign of Peace we do at every Mass as a "peace symbol")

Italian horns

What makes an Italian horn different from a regular one?

stars

The Star of Bethlehem too?

wishbones

Whenever I'm eating chicken or turkey, I save it until I get somebody to help with the wishbone.

horseshoes

You already said that, and the answer is still no!

incense

When I go to Eucharistic Adoration to adore Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament, my brother dispenses incense on the crowd (I try not to cough)

fleur-de-lis

It is a symbol of the Lord's Resurrection!

Thank you, and may you enjoy your time with us.

I need to reload my printer to print out your arrest warrants!

[Ahimaaz Smith]

Re: King James 1611!

I've always loved 2 Peter 3:16, in which the Apostle, speaking of Paul's teachings, said:

As also in all his epistles, speaking in them of these things; in which are some things hard to be understood, which they that are unlearned and unstable wrest, as they do also the other scriptures, unto their own destruction.

In this verse, we see the magnitude of Peter's Christian love for Paul and the breadth of Peter's admiration for the abiding subtlety of Paul's Biblical interpretations.

Of course, it is best to read the entire Bible with great care, but, in truth, God could have made a pretty good Bible out of the 3:16 verses alone.

[KJV4me]

Re: King James 1611!

Blah blah I like pagans and homers

Why are you trolling my intro thread? Justina Thyme's questions (directed at me, not you by the way) are important! This is serious business!

[Offcr. Albert Martin]

Re: King James 1611!

Why are you trolling my intro thread? Justina Thyme's questions (directed at me, not you by the way) are important! This is serious business!

Why do they call you "Unsaved Trash"?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: King James 1611!

Why do they call you "Unsaved Trash"?

They don't, Rita.

[KJV4me]

Re: King James 1611!

Why do they call you "Unsaved Trash"?

Because I am new to the Landover Baptist Forums, and am not yet an official member of the Landover Baptist Church. Also, my PayPal is not yet set up and consequently I have not yet established a regular tithing schedule. But I'm working on fixing that quickly.

I aim to fix my unsaved trashiness through proving my knowledge of, and adherence to, the KJV 1611, God's Holy Word, and setting up my regular tithing schedule posthaste.

But when Cathlicky pagan homers like you spew vomit all over my threads, especially my intro thread, it only slows my path to LBC acceptance and true salvation.

Although you obviously don't care whether or not you burn in Hell, I do. So if you could stop from ruining my chances at joining the One True Church and achieving salvation, I would appreciate it very much. As I said before, this is serious business.

[Justina Thyme]

Re: King James 1611!

Even though I owe you nothing, through my True Christian™ compassion I have decided to reply to your post even before that of a righteous gentleman like KJV1611 because you certainly need this information more quickly and urgently than he does:

Does Kermit the Frog count? I am a BIG Muppets fan.

http://www.demonbuster.com/idols.html

How about X the Owl? (I'm a HUGE Mr. Rogers fan-LBC doesn't like him because he preached that God loves everyone just the way they are)

http://www.demonbuster.com/idols.html

Do images of the Sacred Heart count?

http://www.demonbuster.com/idols.html

Frequently mentioned in the Bible as God's messengers. Why do you forbid them, "bible believers"?

Anything that becomes a fad has probably got a demonic background; angel statues, for instance, started by the New Agers.

The Miami Dolphins? My son's a huge fan!

Dolphins are said to possess nearly human intelligence. This is an abomination.

Guilty as charged. Ya know, God uses them to show His glory (these Japanese inventors have 24th century technology)
The people in these countries follow heathen religions and worship false gods.

What wrong is there in that so long as we don't bow down to or worship them? (We don't pray to the images of Jesus and the saints, but the people they represent).

We believe that you should NOT have any, and that it could be a form of idolatry. Exodus 20:4 "You shall not make yourself any graven image [to worship it] or any likeness of anything that is in the heavens above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.")
They may have originated there, but it doesn't matter what things started as, it's what they are now.

http://www.demonbuster.com/dolls.html

?

http://www.demonbuster.com/paisley.html

History has long forgotten the godess-Nobody believes in her anymore.

The point is that this was a false religion.

Even the ones who stay faithful to the Lord?

There is no such thing as a True Christian™ celebrity. There are too many temptations in their paths, and human flesh is weak.

Remember the story of Noah's Ark?Rainbows became a fad started by New Agers.
And what is so evil about ancestors?

Certain objects passed down from them may retain their sins and thus be cursed.

To me, it's just a symbol of the Trinity-three leaves on the stem, three Persons in one God.

They are used as good luck charms and are therefore superstition, a form of witchcraft.


None with me, Ma'am!

If this is an attempt at humor, I suggest you try something else.

I have none of these, but I bet you wanted to add "Any Bible other than the KJV1611"...I have almost every other one!

The answer here should be obvious, even to you.

What is so evil about them by nature? You're not superstitious enough to believe in "evil sounds," are you?

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showp...65&postcount=1

What's so evil about flamingos?

FLAMINGO (bird) - Got this from Public TV - According to African myth, the Phoenix (Egyptian god) was on fire in a volcano fire. When the fire died down, in the ashes, was the Flamingo. Flamingo's are called "The Fire Bird". Phoenicians believed Flamingo feathers would bring immortality. Their diet causes their red color.

I'm not technologically impaired-you must be thinking about the Amish.

SUNDIAL - Found this advertisement - "Sundial is a symbol of eternal life, spirit of eternal love." Maybe you need to get rid of yours, and dial the SON.

The only tapes I own are by Scott Hahn, Patrick Madrid, Jeff Cavins, Fr. John Corapi and people like them.

Records and tapes all fall in the category of things which have been often loaded with evil spiritual power. These people are representatives of false religions.

What makes an Italian horn different from a regular one?

It is called a cornuto and is used for protection from the evil eye.

The Star of Bethlehem too?

That Star is Biblical and is therefore not included.

Whenever I'm eating chicken or turkey, I save it until I get somebody to help with the wishbone.

You would do well to not touch that object, much less make a wish on it. This is a form of witchcraft.

When I go to Eucharistic Adoration to adore Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament, my brother dispenses incense on the crowd (I try not to cough)

II. Objects of idolatry. The sun and moon were early selected as outward symbols of all-pervading power, and the worship of the heavenly bodies was not only the most ancient but the most prevalent system of idolatry. Taking its rise in the plains of Chaldea, it spread through Egypt, Greece, Scythia, and even Mexico and Ceylon. Deuteronomy 4:10; 17:3; Job 31:20-28. In the later times of the monarchy, the planets or the zodiacal signs received, next to the sun and moon, their share of popular adoration. 2 Kings 23:5. Beast worship, as exemplified in the calves of Jeroboam, has already been alluded to. Of pure hero worship among the Semitic races we find no trace. The singular reverence with which trees have been honored is not without example is the history of the Hebrews. The terebinth (oak) at Mamre, beneath which Abraham built an altar, Genesis 12:7; 13:18, and the memorial grove planted by him at Beersheba, Genesis 21:33, were intimately connected with patriarchal worship. Mountains and high places were chosen spots for offering sacrifice and incense to idols, I Kings 11:7; 14:23; and the retirement of gardens and the thick shade of woods offered great attractions to their worshipers. 2 Kings 16:4; Isaiah 1:29; Hosea 4:13. The host of heaven was worshiped on the house-top. 2 Kings 23:12; Jeremiah 19:3; 32:29; Zephaniah 1:5.

It is a symbol of the Lord's Resurrection!

Many symbols are of demonic origin: Fleur-de-Lis - Britannica Encyclopedia gives this explanation. In India and in Egypt it was common decorating device used as a symbol of life and resurrection, the attribute of the god Horus.

I need to reload my printer to print out your arrest warrants!

Perhaps you should print one out for yourself from satan.

[Offcr. Albert Martin]

Re: King James 1611!

They don't, Rita.

Rita? Why "Rita?"

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: King James 1611!

Rita? Why "Rita?"

I suppose because it rhymes with your job title.

[Justina Thyme]

Re: King James 1611!

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Oh no, I can't believe it, but I am guitly of possessing some items on your list. Specifically, I have some items from JAPAN

I have a Toshiba DVD player and a Mitsubishi television set. Although I promise that I only use these items to watch Biblical-based educational and worship programs. I just never realized until now that Toshiba and Mitsubishi are Jap companies, although I should have given their foreign-sounding names.

BOYCE and BOICE are two demons that can possess interfere with any electronic equipment, i.e., phone, computer, printer, automobile. Command these two demons to leave your equipment in the name of Jesus. We get many emails saying this worked.

Oh my goodness it gets worse! I have a full-size movie poster depicting Charlton Heston in the movie The Ten Commandments.

What should I do about this? Are these crimes in the eyes of Our Lord? Please let me know!

My best advice to you, KJV1611, would be to burn the poster, especially as it contains a likeness of Moses, who was a real man who carried out the word of the LORD. The movie is a product of Hellywood, and nothing untainted has ever come from that iniquitous piece of hell on earth.

[Offcr. Albert Martin]

Re: King James 1611!

My best advice to you, KJV1611, would be to burn the poster, especially as it contains a likeness of Moses, who was a real man who carried out the word of the LORD. The movie is a product of Hellywood, and nothing untainted has ever come from that iniquitous piece of hell on earth.

Not even The Passion of the Christ?

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: King James 1611!

Not even The Passion of the Christ?

If it has anything to do with Mel Gibson, you should pray the demons off of it. Gibson belongs to a "traditionalist Catholic" cult that regards the Pope as not damned enough to be a proper Romanist leader. Gibson has even criticized our Divinely hand-picked President's liberation of Iraq.

[KJV4me]

Re: King James 1611!

My best advice to you, KJV1611, would be to burn the poster, especially as it contains a likeness of Moses, who was a real man who carried out the word of the LORD. The movie is a product of Hellywood, and nothing untainted has ever come from that iniquitous piece of hell on earth.

Thank you, Justina Thyme. Just a few moments ago I had my wife pull down the poster, and then I doused it in kerosene and lit it ablaze in the fireplace. I can also assure you that I will not allow this kind of transgression to occur in my house again.

[KJV4me]

Re: King James 1611!

Not even The Passion of the Christ?

Although that movie is about Our Lord Jesus Christ, it was directed by a Cathylick, so I have refrained from obtaining the film pending guidance from the Landover Baptist Church staff.

[Justina Thyme]

Re: King James 1611!

Good for you, KJV4me. Only in this way shall you be cleansed of your DEMONS and your sins.