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  • Prof.Guide
    Unsaved trash
    Under Investigation
    • Aug 2012
    • 3

    #1

    Always with God

    Hello!

    I study at the church of appreciation in australia

    i've come to learn more about god and his teachings

    looking forward to a good chat!

    thanks

    any questions just ask!

  • Dr Laurence Niles
    Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
     
    • Jan 2012
    • 9063

    #2
    Re: Always with God

    Originally posted by Prof.Guide View Post
    Hello!

    I study at the church of appreciation in australia

    i've come to learn more about god and his teachings

    looking forward to a good chat!

    thanks

    any questions just ask!

    How much of the Bible have you read?

    YIC
    1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

    Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

    Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

    Comment

    • Prof.Guide
      Unsaved trash
      Under Investigation
      • Aug 2012
      • 3

      #3
      Re: Always with God

      Not too much to be honest

      thats why im here

      Comment

      • Talitha
        Deaconess
        Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
        True Christian™
        • Mar 2026
        • 15118

        #4
        Re: Always with God

        What does Prof mean?

        Sister Talitha

        Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


        HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
        being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



        Comment

        • Dr Laurence Niles
          Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
           
          • Jan 2012
          • 9063

          #5
          Re: Always with God

          Originally posted by Prof.Guide View Post
          Not too much to be honest

          thats why im here
          One time I chaired a multi discipline meeting about how to adapt our current Drug and Alcohol service with the Personality Disorder unit.

          One of the drug workers however, knew nothing about PD but kept asking questions that the answer was obvious to.

          He knew nothing about what he spoke and was very critical because of it.

          I worry that you having not read the Bible will preclude serious activity on this site by you.

          Many people come here but do not have the decency to read the Bible (KJV1611) cover to cover before comming here to praise God in His infinite conditional love, mercy and vengeance.

          Jesus died for a whole three days and you cannot be bothered to read His humble book ALL THE WAY THROUGH SKIPPING NOTHING (note: even the lineages!).

          Does His sacrifice to save you from you deserved God decreed punishment mean nothing to you? Where is your common decency?

          What you need to do is to show you're willing: repent, confess, whatever you want to call it but you need Jesus deep inside of you before it is too late.

          People die unsaved all the time. A car, a train, a hippopotami incursion: when Jesus puts the smack down on you you better know that you are saved. Why?

          That's right: Hell!

          Hell is where all the dogs, murderers, heathens, queers, the majority of rapist and wizards go to burn for ever in the Lake of Fire (note that even scientist now agree this is the Earths core so it is very definitly a real place and not a misinterpretation of a refuse site in some bronze age city!).

          Relax. Be still. Worry not.

          To avoid this fate all you need to do is READ THE BIBLE COVER TO COVER AND LIVE BY IT.

          Then you will know Jesus and the real message of God and just how much He loves those how follow His laws.

          Does that make any sense?
          1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

          Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

          Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

          Comment

          • Mary Etheldreda
            Gushing for Jesus
             
            • Sep 2011
            • 23775

            #6
            Re: Always with God

            Originally posted by Prof.Guide View Post
            Hello!

            I study at the church of appreciation in australia

            i've come to learn more about god and his teachings

            looking forward to a good chat!

            thanks

            any questions just ask!

            You'll find the answers to the questions you seek here. But I feel it would be only prudent to remind you that you are among grown ups now, people who take their faith and their lives very, very seriously. For this reason, we assume those with whom we take the time to converse are also adults. Playing games with atheists or those who think they are Christians but water down the faith to the point where they honestly believe God loves everyone are of no interest to us. One way we can identify an intelligent, sincere, adult, is by their writing style. Your refusal to follow the very simple directions you read before posting, your refusal to utilize standard grammar, your simpleton ways betrays a level of immaturity here that will not garnish the kind of response you may wish to have. I beseech you to come clean, be honest with us, and let us know why you have really come to our friendly forums.

            Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

            Comment

            • LaQrundrellia
              Forum Member, Repentant nigress
              Forum Member
              • Jul 2012
              • 214

              #7
              Re: Always with God

              You up in Australia wrestlin aligators, and everybody know England kicked ya'll out for sodomy and lewdness.

              Do you agree that homosexuality is a plague on man? What do you think should be done with homosexuals?

              Yours in His Love,

              Laqrundrellia
              http://www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/1611-Bible/

              Comment

              • Faith_Machine
                Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
                True Christian™
                • Mar 2011
                • 10050

                #8
                Re: Always with God

                Hey there friend, you listen to Laurence Niles!

                Now then, we hardly know anything about you! What is this "Appreciation Church" you speak of? What does that mean? Do you all sit around in a circle giving each other positive affirmations?
                WARNING:
                In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                Comment

                • Pastor Ezekiel
                  Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                   
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 78555

                  #9
                  Re: Always with God

                  Originally posted by Prof.Guide View Post
                  Hello!

                  I study at the church of appreciation in australia

                  i've come to learn more about god and his teachings

                  looking forward to a good chat!

                  thanks

                  any questions just ask!

                  What are you a professor of? Certainly not grammar or punctuation.

                  If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

                  If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

                  You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

                  Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
                  Who Will Jesus Damn?

                  Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                  Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                  Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                  Comment

                  • Rev. M. Rodimer
                    Honorary True Christian™
                    Forum Member
                    • May 2008
                    • 13996

                    #10
                    Re: Always with God

                    Originally posted by Prof.Guido View Post
                    Hello!

                    I study at the church of appreciation in australia
                    Hi, Professor Guido! What do you teach?

                    Odd, I can't seem to find a website for a "Church of Appreciation". Maybe you can provide a link?

                    i've come to learn more about god and his teachings
                    Yet you want to learn from us, instead from the Bible, God's Word. Why is that?

                    Do you expect learning what God wants of you to be easy, a little checklist to follow?

                    I realize the Bible is almost as big as one of the later Harry Potter books, and may seem daunting. But in my signature, you'll find two great resources! Bible in a Year is right here on this forum, and you can discuss the Bible with Landover's top theologians. Real Bible Stories lets you eavesdrop on a very inquisitive Sunday School class; those kids ask some tough questions!

                    I hope these are useful in your journey to find Jesus.
                    Bible boring? Nonsense!
                    Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                    You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                    Comment

                    • Prof.Guide
                      Unsaved trash
                      Under Investigation
                      • Aug 2012
                      • 3

                      #11
                      Re: Always with God

                      Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
                      Hi, Professor Guido! What do you teach?

                      Odd, I can't seem to find a website for a "Church of Appreciation". Maybe you can provide a link?


                      Yet you want to learn from us, instead from the Bible, God's Word. Why is that?

                      Do you expect learning what God wants of you to be easy, a little checklist to follow?

                      I realize the Bible is almost as big as one of the later Harry Potter books, and may seem daunting. But in my signature, you'll find two great resources! Bible in a Year is right here on this forum, and you can discuss the Bible with Landover's top theologians. Real Bible Stories lets you eavesdrop on a very inquisitive Sunday School class; those kids ask some tough questions!

                      I hope these are useful in your journey to find Jesus.
                      The 'Harry Potter' book you speak of is blasphemy, it has been banned in all of our inner circles. It spreads the word of Satan and I pray that you never mention to me again.

                      I've come to learn more about the Bible, not just the scripture but the actual meaning, WHAT DOES GOD ALLOW? WHAT DOES HE DENY?

                      -- In regards to the Australian comments, I was born and bred English. Thank you.

                      Comment

                      • Dr Laurence Niles
                        Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
                         
                        • Jan 2012
                        • 9063

                        #12
                        Re: Always with God

                        Originally posted by Prof.Guide View Post
                        The 'Harry Potter' book you speak of is blasphemy, it has been banned in all of our inner circles. It spreads the word of Satan and I pray that you never mention to me again.

                        I've come to learn more about the Bible, not just the scripture but the actual meaning, WHAT DOES GOD ALLOW? WHAT DOES HE DENY?

                        -- In regards to the Australian comments, I was born and bred English. Thank you.
                        Let's forget about Harry Potter, please. We really don't need that crap clogging up the thread. You know it's bad, we know it's bad and most of all God know's it's bad.

                        So let's just drop it.

                        I'm more concerned about you implying that a litteral reading of the Bible is insufficient to gleen the 'meaning'.

                        When the Bible tells us that Jesus turned water into wine in John 2:1-11 and when the Bible says to kill all those dirty queers in Leviticus 20:13 that's exactly what He means.

                        The meaning is what it says. So called interpretation is always done by shysters and joos who want to make Jesus out to be some panty waste hippy.

                        Jesus has a mouth sword you know?

                        YIC
                        1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

                        Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

                        Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

                        Comment

                        • Rev. M. Rodimer
                          Honorary True Christian™
                          Forum Member
                          • May 2008
                          • 13996

                          #13
                          Re: Always with God

                          Originally posted by Prof.Guide View Post
                          I've come to learn more about the Bible, not just the scripture but the actual meaning, WHAT DOES GOD ALLOW? WHAT DOES HE DENY?
                          These are specifically spelled out in the Bible.

                          You'd do well to read it, instead of engaging in ridiculous fantasies about your "inner circle", don't you think?



                          If you expect us to sit here and list all of God's 600+ commands for you, when you're perfectly capable of reading God's Word yourself, you will be sorely disappointed.
                          Bible boring? Nonsense!
                          Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                          You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                          Comment

                          • Faith_Machine
                            Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
                            True Christian™
                            • Mar 2011
                            • 10050

                            #14
                            Re: Always with God

                            Originally posted by Prof.Guide View Post
                            The 'Harry Potter' book you speak of is blasphemy, it has been banned in all of our inner circles.
                            What are these inner circles you speak of? Why the need for secrecy? Are you Freemasons or something? And what about those who haven't been initiated into your secret mystery school? Are you saying it's OK for them to pollute their minds with Harry Potter?

                            The Good News of Jesus Christ is for everybody, friend. No secret initiations or weird handshakes required!
                            WARNING:
                            In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                            REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                            Comment

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