Um, hi

[Esther B.]

Hi there! I've never been good with introduction posts, so this may be kind of awkward.

I guess I should start off by saying that I am an unemployed Christian from the East Coast. I haven't gone to church in a while, but I'm trying to make religion (I'm a Protestant) more important in my life. I'm taking some time off from college after having some academic issues so I can see if I can figure out what God's plan for me is.

I guess that's everything!

If anyone has any questions, just ask!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Um, hi

Hi there! I've never been good with introduction posts, so this may be kind of awkward.

I guess I should start off by saying that I am an unemployed Christian from the East Coast. I haven't gone to church in a while, but I'm trying to make religion (I'm a Protestant) more important in my life. I'm taking some time off from college after having some academic issues so I can see if I can figure out what God's plan for me is.

I guess that's everything!

If anyone has any questions, just ask!

I see you've overlooked the idiot-proof instructions at the top of the page:

Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

Then you can explain how role-playing an effeminate, Satanically-possessed bloodsucking monster obsessed with fashion is bringing you closer to God.

[Esther B.]

Re: Um, hi

Ugh, I knew I forgot something! Make that 2 things (I forgot to explain the username).

Favorite Bible verse, hmmm... there are a few, but my favorite one is Luke 6.31.


As for my username, it's basically the username that I've used when I've joined other sites in the past. It came from a joke that I had with my ex-boyfriend, who ended up becoming corrupted by the Catholic school that he went to.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Um, hi

Ugh, I knew I forgot something! Make that 2 things (I forgot to explain the username).

Favorite Bible verse, hmmm... there are a few, but my favorite one is Luke 6.31.


As for my username, it's basically the username that I've used when I've joined other sites in the past. It came from a joke that I had with my ex-boyfriend, who ended up becoming corrupted by the Catholic school that he went to.

You never thought that perhaps it would not be the best choice for a Christian church's private discussion forum?

So, you like the Golden Rule. Do you warn people (homosexuals, adulterers like Newt Gingrich, Papists, non-Christians of all sorts, and all other sinners) that if they refuse Jesus' love, He will burn them alive for all time in His Lake of Fire? Or do you not love them enough?

[Esther B.]

Re: Um, hi

It was either that or something to do with angels and I don't think I'm worthy of comparing myself to a being that is much, much holier than I am.

I don't get out of my house much, so I've never been able to warn people about going to Hell. I like the verse, but it's mainly used as a way to remind myself to be nicer to my sister.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Um, hi

It was either that or something to do with angels and I don't think I'm worthy of comparing myself to a being that is much, much holier than I am.

I don't get out of my house much, so I've never been able to warn people about going to Hell. I like the verse, but it's mainly used as a way to remind myself to be nicer to my sister.

Do you warn her about Hell? And teach her to read her Bible every day?

[Esther B.]

Re: Um, hi

I've warned her about Hell before, but I'm still working on the part about reading the Bible. She just needs to read it a little more often.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Um, hi

Hi there! I've never been good with introduction posts, so this may be kind of awkward.

I guess I should start off by saying that I am an unemployed Christian from the East Coast. I haven't gone to church in a while, but I'm trying to make religion (I'm a Protestant) more important in my life. I'm taking some time off from college after having some academic issues so I can see if I can figure out what God's plan for me is.

I guess that's everything!

If anyone has any questions, just ask!

No, that's not everything....

How old are you? What's your name? What's the name of your church?

I find your username offensive. No Christian would use it. It's not a funny joke.

[Esther B.]

Re: Um, hi

This time, I won't forget anything.

I'm 20 years old, my name is Stephanie, and I'm a member of the Newtown Congregational Church.

I know that I'm the only one who will find this humorous, but I'd love to see how my ex would respond if he knew that I still used this username..

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Um, hi

This time, I won't forget anything.

I'm 20 years old, my name is Stephanie, and I'm a member of the Newtown Congregational Church.

I know that I'm the only one who will find this humorous, but I'd love to see how my ex would respond if he knew that I still used this username..

THIS Newton Congregational Church?

Are you Anglicans? You take communion like a papist....

[Esther B.]

Re: Um, hi

Yeah, that one. Nope, United Church of Christ.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Um, hi

Yeah, that one. Nope, United Church of Christ.

What denomination are you?

Which Bible version do you use?

Does your congregation allow female Pastors? Gay weddings?

[Esther B.]

Re: Um, hi

Protestant.

I use a New Revised Standard Version Bible.

The congregation does allow female pastors, but the one we have gives sermons that are kind of dull. I have no idea if we allow gay weddings.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Um, hi

Protestant.

There are hundreds of types of "Protestants." Most of them are false Christians. Which kind are you?

I use a New Revised Standard Version Bible.

I'm sorry to tell you, but that is a satanic bible you have there. I advise you to burn it immediately.

Please take a look at my sermon HERE on how to tell which Bible version is the one TRUE Word of God.

[Esther B.]

Re: Um, hi

Congregationalist.

If I remember, I'll do it tomorrow since my parents are asleep and I probably shouldn't be burning anything without them knowing. On second thought, I may just end up keeping my Bible until I can get a non-Satanic one, just so I at least have a Bible in my possession, just in case I need it.