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  • EvaRitaVazquez
    Unsaved trash, hot mess
    • Sep 2012
    • 22

    #16
    Re: Hello All!

    Originally posted by James Hutchins View Post
    I hope the donkey did not catch anything from you.
    No, no. He did not touch my merchant marines. I kidney bean pie hatchet, you KNOW mama gets the whut whut.
    Ecclesiastes 4:5 The fool foldeth his hands together, and eateth his own flesh.

    Comment

    • Rev. M. Rodimer
      Honorary True Christian™
      Forum Member
      • May 2008
      • 13996

      #17
      Re: Hello All!

      Originally posted by EvaRodriguezVazquez View Post
      No, no. He did not touch my merchant marines. I kidney bean pie hatchet, you KNOW mama gets the whut whut.


      Tell me, can you count to potato?
      Bible boring? Nonsense!
      Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
      You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

      Comment

      • EvaRitaVazquez
        Unsaved trash, hot mess
        • Sep 2012
        • 22

        #18
        Re: Hello All!

        Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post


        Tell me, can you count to potato?
        I would like to say yes sir! But no
        Ecclesiastes 4:5 The fool foldeth his hands together, and eateth his own flesh.

        Comment

        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78556

          #19
          Re: Hello All!

          Originally posted by EvaRodriguezVazquez View Post
          I would like to say yes sir! But no
          You're a hot mess, aren't you.

          Ever been shot?
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

          Comment

          • Faith_Machine
            Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
            True Christian™
            • Mar 2011
            • 10050

            #20
            Re: Hello All!

            Originally posted by EvaRodriguezVazquez View Post
            No, no. He did not touch my merchant marines. I kidney bean pie hatchet, you KNOW mama gets the whut whut.
            I don't think any of those words are Spanish, yet I can't make heads or tails out of anything you just said.

            Are you on dope, girl?
            WARNING:
            In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
            REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

            Comment

            • EvaRitaVazquez
              Unsaved trash, hot mess
              • Sep 2012
              • 22

              #21
              Re: Hello All!

              Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
              I don't think any of those words are Spanish, yet I can't make heads or tails out of anything you just said.

              Are you on dope, girl?
              None dope. What I'm told is my mouth is my best tool, my boss says that is how he makes money!!! I'm just happy to help!
              Ecclesiastes 4:5 The fool foldeth his hands together, and eateth his own flesh.

              Comment

              • Faith_Machine
                Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
                True Christian™
                • Mar 2011
                • 10050

                #22
                Re: Hello All!

                So I take it you're a singer?
                WARNING:
                In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                Comment

                • Bible Thumping Billy
                  Forum Member
                  Forum Member
                  • Jan 2012
                  • 103

                  #23
                  Re: Hello All!

                  Originally posted by EvaRodriguezVazquez View Post
                  None dope. What I'm told is my mouth is my best tool, my boss says that is how he makes money!!! I'm just happy to help!
                  That is disgusting...

                  I'm trying to keep a level head, and maybe just maybe I would love to see you ditch your dirty beaner, Cathlick ways and be filled with Jesus instead.

                  Listen, pick up a Bible (King James Version of course!!) and let God into your heart, He will guide you. If you are lucky, maybe one day you will find yourself an ex-messicant reborn again as a soldier of Christ. For if you cannot follow our simple instructions on where to start an eternity in Hell awaits you.
                  Romans 2:6-8 basically in laymen's terms this verse explains that you are going to hell unless you allow Jesus into your heart and follow in His commandments.

                  Comment

                  • peterr89
                    Confirmed Enemy of God
                    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                    • Sep 2012
                    • 2

                    #24
                    Re: Hello All!

                    Hello and welcome to the forum!

                    Comment

                    • Bible Thumping Billy
                      Forum Member
                      Forum Member
                      • Jan 2012
                      • 103

                      #25
                      Re: Hello All!

                      Originally posted by peterr89 View Post
                      Hello and welcome to the forum!
                      Did we miss your introduction? Please create your own thread and tell us about yourself, the church you attend, and how you came to know Jesus.

                      Comment

                      • EvaRitaVazquez
                        Unsaved trash, hot mess
                        • Sep 2012
                        • 22

                        #26
                        Re: Hello All!

                        Originally posted by Bible Thumping Billy View Post
                        That is disgusting...

                        I'm trying to keep a level head, and maybe just maybe I would love to see you ditch your dirty beaner, Cathlick ways and be filled with Jesus instead.

                        Listen, pick up a Bible (King James Version of course!!) and let God into your heart, He will guide you. If you are lucky, maybe one day you will find yourself an ex-messicant reborn again as a soldier of Christ. For if you cannot follow our simple instructions on where to start an eternity in Hell awaits you.
                        Romans 2:6-8 basically in laymen's terms this verse explains that you are going to hell unless you allow Jesus into your heart and follow in His commandments.
                        Thank you for your kind words! They make the alfalfa of authenticity sprout from my shrimplings and run piggledy-piggledy in the scampering moonlight of avid pan nationalism. How green was my valley! How low can you go!

                        I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by term limits drag queen hysterical...
                        Last edited by Born Again Bob; 09-30-2012, 04:49 PM. Reason: Fixed typo.
                        Ecclesiastes 4:5 The fool foldeth his hands together, and eateth his own flesh.

                        Comment

                        • Isabel G
                          DOF investigation completed.
                          Checks out perfectly.
                          Forum Member
                          • Jul 2012
                          • 34

                          #27
                          Re: Hello All!

                          Originally posted by EvaRodriguezVazquez View Post
                          Thank you for your kind words! They make the alfalfa of authenticity sprout from my shrimplings and run piggledy-piggledy in the scampering moonlight of avid pan nationalism. How green was my valley! How low can you go!

                          I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by term limits drag queen hysterical...
                          Hi Eva!

                          I grew up in the church, first of all. My father abandoned me when I was 3 after trying to kill my mother. He's been in and out of jail ever since.

                          My life was never the easiest- I had a life that fueled the "either God comes through or I'm going to die" kind of faith. It's a blessing and a curse.

                          Because it pushes me into realms spiritually that are difficult to enter, at the same time it's literal- I was not supposed to live to be nineteen according to humans. I should have died at the age of eight.

                          It's nice to meet you!

                          Comment

                          • Mrs. Naomi Portway
                            True Christian™
                            True Christian™
                            • Apr 2012
                            • 123

                            #28
                            Re: Hello All!

                            Originally posted by EvaRodriguezVazquez View Post
                            Thank you for your kind words! They make the alfalfa of authenticity sprout from my shrimplings and run piggledy-piggledy in the scampering moonlight of avid pan nationalism. How green was my valley! How low can you go!

                            I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by term limits drag queen hysterical...
                            Eva, I think you might be possesed by a demon because what you're writing doesn't make sense. Also, Aaron says all Mexican girls are diseased sluts with maggots in their lady parts.

                            So, I guess it's nice to meet you and I hope you don't ave bugs down there or anything. Also, you should become a real Christian so you don't go to Hell. And get rid of the demon first, I think it would be hard to become a True Christian while a demon is living in your brain.
                            Aaron said I should have this for my signature to remind me how to be a good wife.

                            "Feminism is a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians."

                            Pat Robertson

                            Comment

                            • EvaRitaVazquez
                              Unsaved trash, hot mess
                              • Sep 2012
                              • 22

                              #29
                              Re: Hello All!

                              Originally posted by Mrs. Naomi Portway View Post
                              Eva, I think you might be possesed by a demon because what you're writing doesn't make sense. Also, Aaron says all Mexican girls are diseased sluts with maggots in their lady parts.

                              So, I guess it's nice to meet you and I hope you don't ave bugs down there or anything. Also, you should become a real Christian so you don't go to Hell. And get rid of the demon first, I think it would be hard to become a True Christian while a demon is living in your brain.
                              No bugs I don't think. I will check though
                              Ecclesiastes 4:5 The fool foldeth his hands together, and eateth his own flesh.

                              Comment

                              • James Hutchins
                                True Christian™
                                Just a Regular Nice Guy
                                 
                                • Jun 2009
                                • 29453

                                #30
                                Re: Hello All!

                                Originally posted by EvaRodriguezVazquez View Post
                                No bugs I don't think. I will check though
                                Just to be safe, douse the entire area with gasoline and set it ablaze.

                                Live by the phrase "see a louse, always douse'.

                                You can also pop a cap in any bug you see if gasoline is not handy.
                                Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                                Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                                Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                                Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                                Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                                Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                                Comment

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