X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
  • #1

    Hello all

    My name is Ann, and I'm a reformed something. I didn't know what was wrong with me all those years, then I got awhomp on the head, and now I realize that I had been taught and kept believing all the wrong stuff in the wrong ways......

    At least finally, I found a place that has enough boompsa to tell it like it is.

    Hope to learn and do something besides all the wrong stuff.
    This space for KJV use only.
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Re: Hello all

    What?
    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: Hello all

      Has your father given permisson to be on the internet, young lady?

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: Hello all

        I quit asking my smoking mommy & dadde for permission when I saw a t.v. commercial telling us to quit smoking, then the next thing I knew, cigarettes tasted really, really bad. I know in my heart that was Jesus leading me right. At least I think it was Jesus. But those other people, they just keep huffing and huffing in spite of my trying to tell them how I finally saw the light.
        This space for KJV use only.

        Comment

        • #5
          Re: Hello all

          Originally posted by Cedar Chip View Post
          I quit asking my smoking mommy & dadde for permission when I saw a t.v. commercial telling us to quit smoking, then the next thing I knew, cigarettes tasted really, really bad. I know in my heart that was Jesus leading me right. At least I think it was Jesus. But those other people, they just keep huffing and huffing in spite of my trying to tell them how I finally saw the light.
          Now my well honed 'God Mocking Whore' is tingling. How exactly do you know that Jesus was leading you right?

          Answer quickly, Jesus could send a bloat of hippopotamuses to crush you any moment and if you are not right with Him you will go straight to Hell with all the dogs and wizards.

          YIC
          1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

          Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

          Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Hello all

            I know it had to be Jesus because the Nicoderm Pat ches I was forced to wear during surgery hospitalization sure the dickins didn't work. It had to be Jesus. Who else could do what nothing else had succeeded at?
            This space for KJV use only.

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Hello all

              Originally posted by Cedar Chip View Post
              I know it had to be Jesus because the Nicoderm Pat ches I was forced to wear during surgery hospitalization sure the dickins didn't work. It had to be Jesus. Who else could do what nothing else had succeeded at?
              So, because you claim something happened yet give insufficient details to permit anyone else to formulate a workable hypothesis, and say you don't know how it happened (yet allow only the possibility that a conscious agent was responsible), your invisible friend had to have done it.

              Comment

              Previous template Next
              Working...
              X