Hello!

[Brother Larry]

Re: Hello!

Yes! I am! I've sinned my whole life believeing that technicolored ponies can save me from the ethernal fire but I was wrong!
Help me see the light!

Someone shout GLORY!

Another reprobate mind has been opened by the power of the love of . Andy, get with one of the senior pastors now. Get rid of all those fancy no-fly underwear and cancel that subscription to Vanity Fair.

Lawd be praised, Andy, you gonna walk with !!!!!!!

[Andy the punked]

Re: Hello!

Aren't you thrilled that you've come across our friendly forum?

I see you've already acknowledged that you are a pervert and a homosexual. Confession always feels good. How long have you been involved in the abomination of same sex relationships? Are you interested in Landover's programs to become the healthy heterosexual GOD intended you to be?

Yes! I am! I've sinned my whole life believeing that technicolored ponies can save me from the ethernal fire but I was wrong!
Help me see the light!

[Brother Larry]

Re: Hello!

Hello!
I'm Andrew and I live in Europe. I'm a Christian and I belive in our Lord Saviour.
I believe that what we do is written in the book that will be read after we depart from this world. That's why I'm trying to live honest and righteous life.
I respect all the people and never insult anyone.

I don't know why my nick was changed without my permission or i don't know why you're describing not only me, but also all new members as "unsaved trash".

I just came here to make a polite conversation and instead I feel like I'm being ridiculed. I don't know what I did to deserve that.

I hope we might get along over time.
I'm really looking forward to knowing you better.

Aren't you thrilled that you've come across our friendly forum?

I see you've already acknowledged that you are a pervert and a homosexual. Confession always feels good. How long have you been involved in the abomination of same sex relationships? Are you interested in Landover's programs to become the healthy heterosexual GOD intended you to be?

(Warning: Don't be fooled by those fly-by-night correspondence courses such as "Homo-Begone" that claim to cure your filthy sexual preference for only $9.95 plus postage and handling. Sanctification of the soul costs way more than that, brother.)

It will be heartwarming to watch your transition from limp-wristed foreigner to a manly, God-fearing Christian. We can't do much about the foreign part, though. Sorry.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Hello!

Right, sorry for not fully reading the instruction.

Let's see...
I was raised in Christian family from the day I was born. I didn't find Jesus. I was raised with Him beside me.

I go to a small Christian church in my parish.

And as for my favourite quote. I had to find the English translation of it.

Matthew 7:1-3 Judge not, that ye be not judged.

It's not my place to jugde people. I don't do that. I'm trying to understand them and help them if needed.

'Parish', what are you some kind of Christian hating, Mary worshipping catholick?

God loves True Christians(tm). He has empowered us to judge people like you. A thankless task.
Leviticus 19:15 Ye shall do no unrighteousness in judgment: thou shalt not respect the person of the poor, nor honor the person of the mighty: but in righteousness shalt thou judge thy neighbour.

Psalm 37:30 The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment.

Proverbs 31:9 Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.

John 7:24 Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.

1st Corinthians 5:12 For what have I to do to judge them also that are without? do not ye judge them that are within?
1st Corinthians 5:13 But them that are without God judgeth. Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.

1st Corinthians 6:1 Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust, and not before the saints?
1st Corinthians 6:2 Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters?
1st Corinthians 6:3 Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to this life?.
1st Corinthians 6:4 If then ye have judgments of things pertaining to this life, set them to judge who are least esteemed in the church.
1st Corinthians 6:5 I speak to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you? no, not one that shall be able to judge between his brethren?
1st Corinthians 6:6 But brother goeth to law with brother, and that before the unbelievers.
(Notice in particular 6:5 where Paul urges us to Judge fellow "brethren" rather than leaving it up to civil authorities.)

2nd Timothy 4:1 I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom;
2nd Timothy 4:2 Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all longsuffering and doctrine.
2nd Timothy 4:3 For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears;
2nd Timothy 4:4 And they shall turn away their ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables.
2nd Timothy 4:5 But watch thou in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, make full proof of thy ministry.

[Basilissa]

Re: Hello!

Right, sorry for not fully reading the instruction.

Let's see...
I was raised in Christian family from the day I was born. I didn't find Jesus. I was raised with Him beside me.

I go to a small Christian church in my parish.

Christian meaning Baptist?

And as for my favourite quote. I had to find the English translation of it.

It usually is not that difficult, given that all translations use the same system of cataloging books and chapters and numbering verses

Matthew 7:1-3 Judge not, that ye be not judged.

It's not my place to jugde people. I don't do that. I'm trying to understand them and help them if needed.

Right, about that... try reading this: The Most MISUNDERSTOOD Passage in All the Bible (Matthew 7:1-5)

[Andy the punked]

Re: Hello!

Right, sorry for not fully reading the instruction.

Let's see...
I was raised in Christian family from the day I was born. I didn't find Jesus. I was raised with Him beside me.

I go to a small Christian church in my parish.

And as for my favourite quote. I had to find the English translation of it.

Matthew 7:1-3 Judge not, that ye be not judged.

It's not my place to jugde people. I don't do that. I'm trying to understand them and help them if needed.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hello!

Beacause I like cartoons mean that I'm a pervert.

That, plus you're a foreigner.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Hello!

Beacause I like cartoons mean that I'm a pervert.

...... I'm also a homosexual or a pervert.

This day I spent peacefully at home preparing for the next day of my work. I did nothing unsual.

I really have no interest in knowing what sins you commited getting ready for work as a cartoon sodomizer.
Does your employer know what you do in your 'off time'? God does.

[Andy the punked]

Re: Hello!

Beacause I like cartoons mean that I'm a pervert.

Maybe not all but some of them can convey the right message to kids.
We all must understand that for them things that can't been seen are hard to understand. Yes, it IS important ot teach them about God in young age, but they also need something they can experience, because that's the way that child develops. Parents, family and the imput from the enviroment should be as positive as possible for the young growing mind.

I admit that I also was raised partially on cartoons and I still feel nostalgic about them. Cartoons were diffrent in my times and are diffrent right now. I find many of them not right for kids.

I was raised in a right way. And no, I'm also a homosexual or a pervert.

This day I spent peacefully at home preparing for the next day of my work. I did nothing unsual.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Hello!

Hello!
I'm Andrew and I live in Europe. I'm a Christian and I belive in our Lord Saviour.
I believe that what we do is written in the book that will be read after we depart from this world. That's why I'm trying to live honest and righteous life.
I respect all the people and never insult anyone.

I don't know why my nick was changed without my permission or i don't know why you're describing not only me, but also all new members as "unsaved trash".

I just came here to make a polite conversation and instead I feel like I'm being ridiculed. I don't know what I did to deserve that.

I hope we might get along over time.
I'm really looking forward to knowing you better.

Friend, the answer is quite simple. We have posted clear instructions at the top of the page.

Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

This request is far easier to fulfill than the Law of God. Your defiance of our forum rules is an indication of a deeper rebellion against your Creator.

Lost on the sea of eternity with no moral compass, you have washed up here on the shores of Landover Baptist Church. I suppose, as one who hates his Maker, you assume this to be coincidence. I assure you that Christ has called you here to find salvation in the pages of His Word.

Since you claim to be a Christian, yet practice disobedience, you are most likely a false prophet. False prophets usually know a few choice verses (John 3:16 comes to mind) and fill the gaps in their knowledge with culture bound cliches, permissiveness, and wishful thinking. I implore you to read the entire Bible, to give yourself, and those who listen to you, a shot at the Kingdom.

Yours in Christ Jesus,

Billy Bob Jenkins

[VictoryOS]

Re: Hello!

Hello Andy. How is your Walk with the Lord going?

Hopefully this book you're talking about isn't filled with images of pornography between animals or between men and animals as that would be a perversion.

Please tell us of all the ways you have glorified God today!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hello!

Dear Andy;

I'm guessing that you're a pervert. If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

YIC,

--Pastor Ezekiel

[Andy the punked]

Hello!
I'm Andrew and I live in Europe. I'm a Christian and I belive in our Lord Saviour.
I believe that what we do is written in the book that will be read after we depart from this world. That's why I'm trying to live honest and righteous life.
I respect all the people and never insult anyone.

I don't know why my nick was changed without my permission or i don't know why you're describing not only me, but also all new members as "unsaved trash".

I just came here to make a polite conversation and instead I feel like I'm being ridiculed. I don't know what I did to deserve that.

I hope we might get along over time.
I'm really looking forward to knowing you better.