Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

[ChefJohn]

Hello. My name is John and I am currently a business owner and chef. I own a small restaurant in Florida (which is full of sinful Cubans and unsaved sodomites) and my goal is to provide Christians with a place to eat where they can get away from these hell bound Heathens. Unfortunately business has gone downhill since I was required to remove a pair of homosexuals from the premises (though Romans 1:32 states that they are worthy of death, I simply scolded them for being so perverse in front of children and women, as they are far too weak to witness such things, and forced them to leave immediately). It's truly sad that the world has come to such a state that it's acceptable to commit such crimes against nature in public.

I am 23 years old and engaged to be married to my wonderful fiance (she hardly ever acts in such a way that I have to beat her). My favorite bible verse is 2 Thessalonians 3:10-12 as it states that those who do not work should not eat and I am extremely tired of freeloaders with food stamps demanding food that they don't deserve.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Praise God and welcome, John.

I hope you don't have any hand washing facilities for your customers or employees in your restaurant. Jesus was not fond of that type of thing.

Matthew 15:2,17-20
2 Why do thy disciples transgress the tradition of the elders? for they wash not their hands when they eat bread.
17 Do not ye yet understand, that whatsoever entereth in at the mouth goeth into the belly, and is cast out into the draught?
18 But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man.
19 For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies:
20 These are the things which defile a man: but to eat with unwashen hands defileth not a man.

[RebekahQuiverfull]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Welcome John! I am a new member as well and I wish to congratulate you on your engagement! You are so blessed to have such a good wife, I shall think of her as pray for the gift of being more obedient.

[ChefJohn]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Praise God and welcome, John.

I hope you don't have any hand washing facilities for your customers or employees in your restaurant. Jesus was not fond of that type of thing.

Matthew 15:2,17-20
2 Why do thy disciples transgress the tradition of the elders? for they wash not their hands when they eat bread.
17 Do not ye yet understand, that whatsoever entereth in at the mouth goeth into the belly, and is cast out into the draught?
18 But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man.
19 For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies:
20 These are the things which defile a man: but to eat with unwashen hands defileth not a man.

While I am unfortunately forced by the Food Safety Administration to have sinks in my restaurant, of course I don't require any of my employees or customers to practice behaviors such as hand washing.

And thank you very much for your Prayers Rebekah. I hope that they will help my fiance in becoming more obedient.

[RebekahQuiverfull]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

You are very much welcome! Do you and your fiancé plan on being quiverfull? I am currently a mother of eleven (soon to be twelve). I welcome each child and praise The Lord for having many sons each day. I also praise him for never taking a child away from me through miscarriage. I do pray you are your soon to be wife are as blessed.

[ChefJohn]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

As my fiance is a very devout woman, I have no doubt that she will bear me many sons. Congratulations on your twelfth child! I will pray that God will give you a healthy and strong son!

[RebekahQuiverfull]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Thank you for your prayers! If God wills this twelfth child to be a son, it will my eighth son! I have four daughters, but of course they are only commonplace compared to the joy of a male child! Your fiancé sounds like a very good woman! I have no fears in her ability to produce many sons for you!

[see_the_light]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

welcome to this loving GOD fearing forum.

I can barely imagine your tribulations with those gayez entering and asking for a "steak à la creme" or some lobster....

Compared to that even the smelly thieving cubists must be refreshing.

We will all pray that GOD continues to give you strength to deal with those GOD mocking perverts.

PRAISE THE LORD!

[ChefJohn]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

welcome to this loving GOD fearing forum.

I can barely imagine your tribulations with those gayez entering and asking for a "steak à la creme" or some lobster....

Compared to that even the smelly thieving cubists must be refreshing.

We will all pray that GOD continues to give you strength to deal with those GOD mocking perverts.

PRAISE THE LORD!

Ah yes, I try to keep the Cubans away by ONLY offering my menu in American English, but they still find a way in sometimes. I also don't offer any disgusting Cuban, Mexican, or Spaniard food. Only good wholesome American food.

Unfortunately I can't seem to find any way to keep out the sodomites. They seem to have varied tastes and they just keep coming back to harass me.

[see_the_light]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Unfortunately I can't seem to find any way to keep out the sodomites. They seem to have varied tastes and they just keep coming back to harass me.

Just add bacon and lard, increase the size of the doses and apply an hefty fine for "unfinished meals". Those queers are so afraid of not entering their tight dresses that they can't eat a man's meal.

PRAISE THE LORD!

[ChefJohn]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Just add bacon and lard, increase the size of the doses and apply an hefty fine for "unfinished meals". Those queers are so afraid of not entering their tight dresses that they can't eat a man's meal.

PRAISE THE LORD!

Ah, well while that is a great idea, I fear that it would drive away any potential female customers. While they should be at home cooking for their husbands or fathers, many young men insist on taking their sweethearts out to eat (as I occasionally do for my Sandra on a particularly special occasion).

[see_the_light]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Ah, well while that is a great idea, I fear that it would drive away any potential female customers. While they should be at home cooking for their husbands or fathers, many young men insist on taking their sweethearts out to eat (as I occasionally do for my Sandra on a particularly special occasion).

Just add some side-dishes for children under 12 and women (ID verification mandatory)

PRAISE THE LORD!

[ChefJohn]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Just add some side-dishes for children under 12 and women (ID verification mandatory)

PRAISE THE LORD!

Why didn't I think of that before? I was quite dense wasn't I? That would also help to ward off the annoying feminist lesbians that seem to be more prominent nowadays.

[see_the_light]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Why didn't I think of that before? I was quite dense wasn't I? That would also help to ward off the annoying feminist lesbians that seem to be more prominent nowadays.

Of course! When there is a mismatch between reported female gender and the bull-dike facing you ... well, just kick her out for violation of restaurant rules and report it to homeland security (fake papers, probable terrorist)

PRAISE THE LORD!

[Alvin Moss]

Re: Greetings from a God-fearing Chef

Why didn't I think of that before? I was quite dense wasn't I? That would also help to ward off the annoying feminist lesbians that seem to be more prominent nowadays.

We have, strange as it may seem, large numbers of women who seek the companionship of other women here in my own city, San Antonio. They are mostly stern women, wearing comfortable shoes who have retired from the Army, though some are probably from the Air Force. The godless Federal Government has discharged long since any heterosexuals, especially the Christians, from the armed forces and there are only homosexuals left.

They eschew makeup and favor flannel shirts and short hair in the fashion of a man. They cohabit. When our congregation witnesses, as we do occasionally of a Wednesday night, they do not welcome our blandishments and they seem to reject the word of God entirely.