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Greetings, I'm interested in becoming the first black man to become a deacon at Landover Baptist. Where do I apply?!?!?
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
Jambo, Bishop!
Are you saved?
Please tell us your congregation, how you were brought to Jesus and your favorite Bible verse to start. We are friendly here.
Praise God!God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11 -
Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
Of course I'm saved! Why wouldn't I be???
I am alpha and omega, beginning and the ending, sayth The Lord, which is, and which was, and which is to come, the almighty. Rev 1:8Comment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
James 2:10. For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend one point, he is guilty of all.Originally posted by bishop View PostOf course I'm saved! Why wouldn't I be???
I am alpha and omega, beginning and the ending, sayth The Lord, which is, and which was, and which is to come, the almighty. Rev 1:8
If you are one of the false Christians who picks and chooses which parts of the bible to follow, then you would not be saved. Only if you follow the whole bible in it's entirety would you be saved.
I admit that as of yet, I am not saved, being an atheist until not long ago b
Anyways
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
Where Pastor Deacon Fred so I can get him to approve my status as deacon?????
Thanks Kewlcat. May your eternity in hell be as pleasant as possible.
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
I'm repenting, so hopefully I won't go to hell, but if I do, then there is no chance whatsoever it will be pleasant. Luckily I still (hopefully) have quite a few more years to repent, so I will be able to end up in heaven. It's nice to meet you too :-)Originally posted by bishop View PostWhere Pastor Deacon Fred so I can get him to approve my status as deacon?????
Thanks Kewlcat. May your eternity in hell be as pleasant as possible.Comment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
He can't even answer simple questions. I smell a rat.Originally posted by Alvin Moss View Post
The day that LBC has a black deacon is the day I leave Freehold.Comment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
You don't. All new comers are required to read this primer for noobs, and be sure to use the King James Version Bible only when sharing your opinions. The rights you have on this forum can be read HERE. Please contact a Pastor immediately if you feel that any of your rights have been violated.Originally posted by bishop View PostHello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
Why wouldn't you submit to the authority of a sanctified, saved black deacon that's full of the Holy Spirit?????? @mother of 7Comment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
I'll translate for you, "Bishop":The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.
Kindly comply.dis here be de only forum u kin start threads in, yo. U gots to innerduce yo as', say hey, where u go onna Sundee mornin, an wat yo mos favrit bible part, yo."Come Unto Me. Put forth thine hand now, and touch all that he hath." (Matthew 19:14, Job 1:11).Comment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
You see people, this is a prime example of what's wrong with your average negra today. Give them a half important job like cotton plant overseer or president, and the next thing you know they feel they are entitled to the real powerful positions like deacon at Landover Baptist.
Friend, you probably would not make it through the gates for a tourist visit. Does that mean we discriminate? No, we hate discrimination. You can always apply for our Ex-Nigra scholarship - if you can afford it, that is
- and maybe, just maybe, upon graduation (and after generous tithing, obviously) you might get a position as Ukraine Outreach Ministry Assistant.
Maybe.Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.Comment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
I'm inbetween congregations right now. I left the last church because they hired an effeminate 'minister'. I've prayed a lot and I've been led by The Lord to LBC to be the first colored deacon!!!!Comment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
It doesn't work that way. Just because you want it, doesn't entitle you to it. But as a nigra, you're used to just taking what you want. Regardless, it ain't going to happen, no matter how much you want it.Originally posted by bishop View PostComment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
As a colored christian I'm used to working hard for everything I want.Comment
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Re: Future First Black deacon at Landover!!
Originally posted by bishop View Post
A hard-working shine...boy, you crack me up!
Yours in Christ,
Z. SmythsigpicComment
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