Seeking perversion

[Navas01]

Hi there,
I am from Australia, and a teenager. Why should I follow your ways? Also what aspects of my life should I endeavour to improve upon?

[Des]

Re: Seeking conversion

Hi there,

Why, hello!

I am from Australia,

I'm sorry.

and a teenager.

Foolish, hormonal, and contemptuous of the wisdom of your elders, got it.

Why should I follow your ways?

Because you won't get into heaven any other way, and the alternative is, as you kids say it, a downer, dude.

Also what aspects of my life should I endeavour to improve upon?

All aspects, and you should begin by learning how to read and follow instructions, because your introduction suggests you didn't bother reading this thread before you posted.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Seeking conversion

Hi there,
I am from Australia, and a teenager. Why should I follow your ways? Also what aspects of my life should I endeavour to improve upon?

Hello,

The first question is easy to answer. To win Eternal Life in Jesus Christ our Savior, to avoid the Hellfire, the Furnace, Eternal Damnation.

The second one requires additional data in order to be answered. It is necessary to actually know some things about you and your life to tell what to improve. Reading the King James Bible usually leads to significant improvement, though. It is probably available in Austria in paper format or at least online.

Here's a nice verse for you that could become one of your favorites. It also describes the current relationship between you and us.

Deuteronomy 29:29
The secret things belong unto the LORD our God: but those things which are revealed belong unto us and to our children for ever, that we may do all the words of this law.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Navas01]

Re: Seeking conversion

Hello,

The first question is easy to answer. To win Eternal Life in Jesus Christ our Savior, to avoid the Hellfire, the Furnace, Eternal Damnation.

The second one requires additional data in order to be answered. It is necessary to actually know some things about you and your life to tell what to improve. Reading the King James Bible usually leads to significant improvement, though. It is probably available in Austria in paper format or at least online.

Here's a nice verse for you that could become one of your favorites. It also describes the current relationship between you and us.

Deuteronomy 29:29
The secret things belong unto the LORD our God: but those things which are revealed belong unto us and to our children for ever, that we may do all the words of this law.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

I'm not from Austria, if you could read you would clearly see that I said I come from Australia.

[Witch Hammer]

Re: Seeking conversion

I'm not from Austria, if you could read you would clearly see that I said I come from Australia.

Guttersnipe!

[Des]

Re: Seeking conversion

I'm not from Austria, if you could read you would clearly see that I said I come from Australia.

Look, we don't care what part of Germany you come from. Our concern is whether or not we can potentially save your kraut reeking soul.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Seeking conversion

Hi there,
I am from Australia, and a teenager. Why should I follow your ways? Also what aspects of my life should I endeavour to improve upon?

This is called the INTRODUCTION thread for a reason. Please tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.

[Navas01]

Re: Seeking conversion

I don't get why you guys enjoy being so nasty. I also don't understand why you think Australia is some second rate country, I hope you guys one day realise there are other countries than the USA.... and if it matters which it doesn't I go to an Orthodox church but you wise people wouldn't care where it is because you think Australia is in Germany.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Seeking conversion

Orthodox? For real? I thought that was a joke from Dilbert.

[Des]

Re: Seeking conversion

and if it matters which it doesn't I go to an Orthodox church ...

So you're a joo? I thought you said you were catlick. And didn't the Germans run your kind out of there?

Something isn't adding up here.

[Navas01]

Re: Seeking conversion

So you're a joo? I thought you said you were catlick. And didn't the Germans run your kind out of there?

Something isn't adding up here.

You know what's sad, you guys claim to be Christian but you're not. This website is utter blasphemy.

[Des]

Re: Seeking conversion

You know what's sad, you guys claim to be Christian but you're not. This website is utter blasphemy.

Says the Albanian Catlick Joo!

[Navas01]

Re: Seeking conversion

Says the Albanian Catlick Joo!

You are a racist, sexist and homophobic fool like the rest of your immature friends.

[Des]

Re: Seeking conversion

You are a racist, sexist and homophobic fool like the rest of your immature friends.

Where on Earth did that come from? Oh yeah, from Germany. I knew there was a reason we kicked your asses.

[Navas01]

Re: Seeking conversion

Where on Earth did that come from? Oh yeah, from Germany. I knew there was a reason we kicked your asses.

No from Australia ***removed profanity***, you dumb stupid fool like the rest of your satan loving friends, get a ***obscenity removed*** education.