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  • Rev. M. Rodimer
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Belly_Mower View Post
    Can I just point out that historical and biblical evidence say that Jesus was probably born in June/July. The true celebration of winter is the Winter Solstice. Christmas was only moved to this time to make converting people easier.
    Really? Please post that historical and Biblical evidence! We look forward to reading it.

    Oh, and be sure to take THIS into account in your evidence:

    Winter temperatures (mid-December to mid-March) can be cold and rainy. January is the coldest month, with temperatures ranging from 1 to 13 degree Celsius (33–55 °F).
    Wow, almost down to freezing. There's just no way that nomadic, tent-dwelling people who didn't have barns would have sheep out in the almost-cold-enough-to-snow. Surely the sheep would freeze to death, because they haven't any warm covering, for example wool.

    Leave a comment:


  • Pastir Cellbaidate
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
    Well folks it's happened AGAIN. I was arrested for rebuking Christmas Carolers and beating up Santa and his minions.

    There I was in the Mall in Des Moines. I was picking up the tie I had special ordered for Pastor Zeke from J.C. Penney's. Only they had sent it to the wrong one so instead of it going to the Penney's in Christ on the Cross Mall in Leviticus Landing it got sent to some Hellbound one in Des Moines.

    Anyway, I go into Penney's and get my purchase. "Happy Holidays" chirps the JC Penney's clerk as I walk out into the mall. This incenses me! Happy Holidays my rump! This is JESUS' BIRTHDAY!

    As I'm walking down the hall I decide to see what other stores are available in the Mall. When lo and behold there they are. A group of Christmas Carolers dressed in old fashioned clothes singing "Santa Clause is Coming to Town". Beside them was a set up with the perverted Mall Santa and his disgusting little elves. There was a line of children to see him that was about a city block long.

    I was OUTRAGED that this Mall was taking CHRIST out of CHRISTmas! How dare these secular shopping Malls teach children that Santa is the reason for the Season when JESUS is the REASON FOR THE SEASON. I was even more outraged that these children were all taking turns climbing into Santa's lap. I think he was nibbling on their ears. Some children cried, but others squealed and wriggled with delight and jumped off his lap with a beaming smile on their face! PERVERTS!

    I'm standing there looking on to this atrocity in HORROR and DISGUST!

    Just then the Carolers came prancing over to me singing "Have a Holly Jolly CHRISTmas". I was consumed with righteous RAGE that they were blasphoming our LORD and HIS BIRTHDAY!

    I whipped out my mace and sprayed them right in the face! I kicked a few and then started swinging my over-sized Bible bag at them. 'HOW DARE YOU TAKE CHRIST OUT OUT CHRISTMAS" I screamed at them! Then I pushed everyone who was in my path out of my way! I was out to get Santa and his demonic little elves!

    I pushed off the kid who was on his lap and he landed with a thud. He started crying. His Mom rushed over to help, she got a GODLY dose of mace right between her eyes! Then I grabbed Santa by his collar and started screaming in his face that he was destroying JESUS' BIRTHDAY! Then I maced him in the face.

    About now his demonic little demon elves are trying to pull me off Santa. I turn around and start pummeling them with my book bag. When they fall to the ground I start kicking and screaming the JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON!!! HOW DARE THEY TAKE THE CHRIST OUT OF CHRISTMAS!

    By now Santa has managed to run limping off into the horrified looking crowd. The Carolers and the elves are laying on the floor moaning, bloodied and crying. I notice all the kids and parents standing in line are screaming and crying. They should have been grateful I was defending JESUS' BIRTHDAY for crying out loud! This makes me even more enraged!

    Winded, I grab a kid and ask him what he is crying about. I start shaking him asking him WHY he doesn't love JESUS? WHYYYYYYYY? "You are ALLLLLLL going to HELL for worshipping SANTA I scream at the crowd!"

    As I was fumbling with my mace to spray his horrified Mom in the eyes about 3 Mall Cops come running over and tackle me. Then a few minutes more some Sheriff's officers were descending upon me! They broke a nail on my right hand as they crudely and roughly slapped cuffs on me. They had to carry me out the awaiting police cruiser. I screamed and yelled the entire way that everybody in that mall WAS GOING STRAIGHT TO HELL!

    As I sat in the hand cuffed and FURIOUS in the police cruiser I saw several ambulances lined up and some wimpy people being put in to them on gurneys. What a bunch of wimps..... and don't they know they DESERVED it for worshipping SATAN?

    There were what seems like hundreds of people lined up on the sidewalk staring at me as the cruiser drove off. I looked as many of them as I could in the eye and mouthed to them that they were GOING TO HELL!


    My Joo lawyer came and got me out a few hours later. I think I may really be in trouble this time folks. Please I need your prayers that I will get off in the name of JESUS. I may also need some donations if some of those Satan whorshipers decide to sue me for their injuries (they brought on themselves.)

    With Lve

    Sister Thumper


    MERRY CHRISTmas
    These pagans have sullied the Name of Our Lord for too long now!!! I stand and applaude you Daisy Mae...if only more took your stance perhaps this abomination of Our Lord Jesus would not be an annual occurrance!!!!!

    Children, do not believe in the devil that is Santa Claus, for he is a heathen. Believe in the One True Lord.......JESUS!!!!!

    Praise Jesus!!!!!!!!!!!

    Leave a comment:


  • BelieverInGod
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Beli_Mawr View Post
    Can I just point out that historical and biblical evidence say that Jesus was probably born in June/July. The true celebration of winter is the Winter Solstice. Christmas was only moved to this time to make converting people easier.
    Let me guess, because the sheep weren't in the barns?

    I'm sorry, but I think if we look around we can find some unsaved Trash claiming every month of the year, but it can't be December! Nope! No Way! Any month but December!!!!!

    Leave a comment:


  • Brother Temperance
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Beli_Mawr View Post
    Can I just point out that historical and biblical evidence say that Jesus was probably born in June/July. The true celebration of winter is the Winter Solstice. Christmas was only moved to this time to make converting people easier.
    Post that historical and biblical evidence or be exposed as the filthy pagan liar that you are.

    Leave a comment:


  • Belly_Mower
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Can I just point out that historical and biblical evidence say that Jesus was probably born in June/July. The true celebration of winter is the Winter Solstice. Christmas was only moved to this time to make converting people easier.

    Leave a comment:


  • Bible Student
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by noble6 View Post
    I didn't. However, anyone who does something like that goes to jail. It was comepletely unwarranted.

    On a related note, what law school did YOU go to.
    I have more attorneys in my family than you can shake a stick at. In various business enterprises I've had several staffs of attorneys. One learns something about the law under those circumstances. Might I ask how many attorneys you retain on a permanent basis?

    One thing my young friend you will learn about the law in the US, it doesn't matter if you committed the crime or not. Your guilt depends upon the quality of your attorney. If our country ever got back to enforcing God's law things would be different. We would be able to stone those homersexurals and uppity negras. We would be able to chop off the hands of thieves and stone sinners who wear more than one type of fabric.

    American is becoming more and more heathen under the influence of those ungodly liberals.
    Last edited by Bible Student; 01-07-2011, 11:10 AM. Reason: I thought I made a mistake but I was mistaken

    Leave a comment:


  • AngelClark
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
    You can say that again! For unsaved trash you are pretty smart.

    Or he just read an earlier post on a different thread.

    Leave a comment:


  • Daisy Mae Johnson
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by BritforGod View Post
    Mix the letter around in the word SANTA, what do you get?
    SATAN!
    You can say that again! For unsaved trash you are pretty smart.

    Leave a comment:


  • BritforGod
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
    Well folks it's happened AGAIN. I was arrested for rebuking Christmas Carolers and beating up Santa and his minions.

    There I was in the Mall in Des Moines. I was picking up the tie I had special ordered for Pastor Zeke from J.C. Penney's. Only they had sent it to the wrong one so instead of it going to the Penney's in Christ on the Cross Mall in Leviticus Landing it got sent to some Hellbound one in Des Moines.

    Anyway, I go into Penney's and get my purchase. "Happy Holidays" chirps the JC Penney's clerk as I walk out into the mall. This incenses me! Happy Holidays my rump! This is JESUS' BIRTHDAY!

    As I'm walking down the hall I decide to see what other stores are available in the Mall. When lo and behold there they are. A group of Christmas Carolers dressed in old fashioned clothes singing "Santa Clause is Coming to Town". Beside them was a set up with the perverted Mall Santa and his disgusting little elves. There was a line of children to see him that was about a city block long.

    I was OUTRAGED that this Mall was taking CHRIST out of CHRISTmas! How dare these secular shopping Malls teach children that Santa is the reason for the Season when JESUS is the REASON FOR THE SEASON. I was even more outraged that these children were all taking turns climbing into Santa's lap. I think he was nibbling on their ears. Some children cried, but others squealed and wriggled with delight and jumped off his lap with a beaming smile on their face! PERVERTS!

    I'm standing there looking on to this atrocity in HORROR and DISGUST!

    Just then the Carolers came prancing over to me singing "Have a Holly Jolly CHRISTmas". I was consumed with righteous RAGE that they were blasphoming our LORD and HIS BIRTHDAY!

    I whipped out my mace and sprayed them right in the face! I kicked a few and then started swinging my over-sized Bible bag at them. 'HOW DARE YOU TAKE CHRIST OUT OUT CHRISTMAS" I screamed at them! Then I pushed everyone who was in my path out of my way! I was out to get Santa and his demonic little elves!

    I pushed off the kid who was on his lap and he landed with a thud. He started crying. His Mom rushed over to help, she got a GODLY dose of mace right between her eyes! Then I grabbed Santa by his collar and started screaming in his face that he was destroying JESUS' BIRTHDAY! Then I maced him in the face.

    About now his demonic little demon elves are trying to pull me off Santa. I turn around and start pummeling them with my book bag. When they fall to the ground I start kicking and screaming the JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON!!! HOW DARE THEY TAKE THE CHRIST OUT OF CHRISTMAS!

    By now Santa has managed to run limping off into the horrified looking crowd. The Carolers and the elves are laying on the floor moaning, bloodied and crying. I notice all the kids and parents standing in line are screaming and crying. They should have been grateful I was defending JESUS' BIRTHDAY for crying out loud! This makes me even more enraged!

    Winded, I grab a kid and ask him what he is crying about. I start shaking him asking him WHY he doesn't love JESUS? WHYYYYYYYY? "You are ALLLLLLL going to HELL for worshipping SANTA I scream at the crowd!"

    As I was fumbling with my mace to spray his horrified Mom in the eyes about 3 Mall Cops come running over and tackle me. Then a few minutes more some Sheriff's officers were descending upon me! They broke a nail on my right hand as they crudely and roughly slapped cuffs on me. They had to carry me out the awaiting police cruiser. I screamed and yelled the entire way that everybody in that mall WAS GOING STRAIGHT TO HELL!

    As I sat in the hand cuffed and FURIOUS in the police cruiser I saw several ambulances lined up and some wimpy people being put in to them on gurneys. What a bunch of wimps..... and don't they know they DESERVED it for worshipping SATAN?

    There were what seems like hundreds of people lined up on the sidewalk staring at me as the cruiser drove off. I looked as many of them as I could in the eye and mouthed to them that they were GOING TO HELL!


    My Joo lawyer came and got me out a few hours later. I think I may really be in trouble this time folks. Please I need your prayers that I will get off in the name of JESUS. I may also need some donations if some of those Satan whorshipers decide to sue me for their injuries (they brought on themselves.)

    With Lve

    Sister Thumper


    MERRY CHRISTmas

    Mix the letter around in the word SANTA, what do you get?
    SATAN!

    Leave a comment:


  • Rev. M. Rodimer
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by noble6 View Post
    I didn't. However, anyone who does something like that goes to jail. It was comepletely unwarranted.
    No, anyone who does something like that does NOT go to jail.

    Here in the United States, we have a little thing called due process of law.

    Sister BTB will have a jury trial. IF she is found guilty, the jury will recommend a sentence. The judge may or may not agree.

    Since a jury is to consist of 12 of the defendant's peers, and only True Christians(tm) can be considered peers of a True Christian(tm), and since Des Moines is a secular cesspool of anti-Christian sentiment where Sister BTB cannot get a fair trial, Brother Gabriel has successfully petitioned for a change of venue. The trial is to be held in Freehold.

    I understand jury selection is currently underway, but am not sure when arguments are to begin.

    Leave a comment:


  • noble6
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Bible Student View Post
    And exactly what grade school did you attend to get your law degree?
    I didn't. However, anyone who does something like that goes to jail. It was comepletely unwarranted.

    On a related note, what law school did YOU go to.

    Leave a comment:


  • Bible Student
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by noble6 View Post
    No. I don't talk to Satan and he isn't my father. My father is a middle school teacher.

    The fact is, BTB can now be legally charged for assault.
    And exactly what grade school did you attend to get your law degree?

    Leave a comment:


  • noble6
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
    Is that what your father satan told you?
    No. I don't talk to Satan and he isn't my father. My father is a middle school teacher.

    The fact is, BTB can now be legally charged for assault.

    Leave a comment:


  • Pastor Ezekiel
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by noble6 View Post
    That was assualt, not love.
    Is that what your father satan told you?

    John 8:43 Why do ye not understand my speech? even because ye cannot hear my word. 8:44 Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it. 8:45 And because I tell you the truth, ye believe me not.

    Leave a comment:


  • noble6
    replied
    Re: Merry CHRISTmas - You are UNDER ARREST (again)

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
    Sister BTB hasn't got an angry bone in her body. She was spreading the love of Jesus, that's all.
    That was assualt, not love.

    Leave a comment:

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