And it is a WAR!

[Glendora Christianson]

Welcome and Merry Christmas! This very special forum's sole purpose is to make sure our Lord Jesus Christ has a happy birthday. To best serve Jesus, we must fight a war every year against heathens, pagans, homosexuals, and infidels (The latter group also includes all of the false Christians out there, and let me tell you, there are plenty!).

I have added a few threads, which are near and dear to the hearts of all Landovarians, so have at it. Mother Glendora

[SUV]

Re: And it is a WAR!

ONWARD, CHRISTIAN SOLDIERS!!!!!

[not_satan]

Re: And it is a WAR!

hey.......so um...why are you fighting them exactly?

If you do want jesus to have a happy birthday than why would you spend it fighting others instead of celebrating?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: And it is a WAR!

hey.......so um...why are you fighting them exactly?

If you do want jesus to have a happy birthday than why would you spend it fighting others instead of celebrating?

Because JESUS.....and we....are happier when our enemies are dead and in HELL.

[Tervie]

Re: And it is a WAR!

any point in me trying to quote all the nice, friendly passages of the Bible? There are a lot of them....we'll stick with one everyone knows...

"Love thy Neighbour"

[Student of Landover]

Re: And it is a WAR!

any point in me trying to quote all the nice, friendly passages of the Bible? There are a lot of them....we'll stick with one everyone knows...

"Love thy Neighbour"

Pervie, if you're going to quote from the Bible, (Only the KJV, by the way) you should do it properly, with Chapter and Verse specified.

Here is one which shows God's glory, telling all of his followers to destroy their enemies.

Deuteronomy 33:27

The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms: and he shall thrust out the enemy from before thee; and shall say, Destroy them.

[Tervie]

Re: And it is a WAR!

sadly, my copy is the Children's Adventure Bible, so anything I ever bother to post will be wrong before your bigotted orbs, yes? ah, close minded fools ye be

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: And it is a WAR!

any point in me trying to quote all the nice, friendly passages of the Bible? There are a lot of them....we'll stick with one everyone knows...

"Love thy Neighbour"

Do you know what God means when He says "neighbor"? Do you think He intended for us to be sweet and nice to islamofascists who want nothing less than the destruction of America? Do you think He meant we should invite sodomites over for pink tea parties to celebrate their depravity and offer them our children to molest? Or maybe you think God intended us to "love" hook-nosed joos, you know, the ones who KILLED CHRIST OUR LORD?!

I think otherwise. I am quite certain that Jesus was admonishing us to love our fellow True Christians™, not unsaved scum such as yourself.

By the way; in the future, if you want to actually quote the Holy Bible rather than paraphrase from it like a half-wit, you might find that you get taken a bit more seriously. Also, don't bother quoting verses out of context. In order to understand the Word of God, you have to study it from cover to cover.

John 8:43 Why do ye not understand my speech? even because ye cannot hear my word.8:44 Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it. 8:45 And because I tell you the truth, ye believe me not.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: And it is a WAR!

sadly, my copy is the Children's Adventure Bible, so anything I ever bother to post will be wrong before your bigotted orbs, yes? ah, close minded fools ye be

So, of the more than 30,000 verses in the KJV1611 Bible, you have read only about a hundred or 150 of the John 3:16 bits?

[Arethusa]

Re: And it is a WAR!

I think the best way to fight the War on Christmas would be the change the date. Everyone knows we're only celebrating it on December 25th because an evil pope told us to centuries ago. That practically makes us Catholic!

[Brother Love]

Re: And it is a WAR!

May the Lord richly bless you for starting this threads and you is absolutely rit..it IS a WAR!! And as Sister Vera Sue says, "Onward CHRISTIAN SOLDIER!"

There sure is lots of HEATHENS and PAGANS out there in the world along with HOMERSEXUALS, INFIDELS, and all sorts of SINFUL PERVERTS a'doin the DEVIL'S evil works! And the sweet LORD knows that there also be plenty of FALSE CHRISTIANS out there in the world too! Practicin their false doctrines and chasin after their false teachers and LYING PROPHETS!! Oh they claim they follow the LORD but they DON'T have the POWER of the LORD, the HOLY SPIRIT cuz they ain't SPIRIT FILLED!! They ain't ON FIRE with the HOLY SPIRIT cuz they is SINNERS ALL!!

This war on Christmas gots to stop! The LORD is goin to do somethin and all we TRUE CHRISTIANS is goin to REJOICE when the UNSAVED TRASH in this world is BURNIN IN HELL'S FIRES! Get the BBQ SAUCE and LIGHT THE FIRES!!

[Poetic Peter]

Re: And it is a WAR!

I think the best way to fight the War on Christmas would be the change the date. Everyone knows we're only celebrating it on December 25th because an evil pope told us to centuries ago. That practically makes us Catholic!

Excellent point, so it's time to remind:

Christ was born as if a Jew.
His birthday is January First;
the day the Child was circumcised.

The seventh day after the birth, the male child would be cut,
and then, and only then, was it considered to have been a living human at all;
if it died before the seventh day, it was of mere flesh-ejection,
not human.

Christ's official birthday during his lifetime, and for centuries to come,
was always pegged as January 1st. And if that was all right by Jesus,
and it evidently was, who are we to allow catlickers to change the DOB
to suit their tutti frutti lickings?

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: And it is a WAR!

Excellent point, so it's time to remind:

Christ was born as if a Jew.
His birthday is January First;
the day the Child was circumcised.

The seventh day after the birth, the male child would be cut,
and then, and only then, was it considered to have been a living human at all;
if it died before the seventh day, it was of mere flesh-ejection,
not human.

Christ's official birthday during his lifetime, and for centuries to come,
was always pegged as January 1st. And if that was all right by Jesus,
and it evidently was, who are we to allow catlickers to change the DOB
to suit their tutti frutti lickings?

Thank you, Peter, for giving me a wonderful idea . . . Let's close the bars between the false holiday and Sweet Baby Jesus' real birthday, so the heathens can show some respect to HIM!

PS For those who refuse to obide by our rules (and I assume they'll be a bit tipsy) a good Godly stoning party will be in order!

[OnYourKnees]

Re: And it is a WAR!

Thank you, Peter, for giving me a wonderful idea . . . Let's close the bars between the false holiday and Sweet Baby Jesus' real birthday, so the heathens can show some respect to HIM!

Perhaps instead we should celebrate His birthday by toasting with a golden, sparkly wine! Surely He would approve of wine-drinking, especially at so momentous an occasion as the celebration of His birth!

We can tell the heathens that's why drinking Champagne (even though it's usually California sparkling white wine) is so popular as soon as it's January 1, a TOAST to JESUS!

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: And it is a WAR!

When will all of this religious oppression come to an end? The nigras, the hippies, the homers, the LIEberals, and the mudslimes have ALL the rights, and we wealthy white male suburban Christians have no more rights at all!! Me and my wife of 34 years, Delores, must live in the shadows, skulking around, driving separate cars on back roads to church to evade the constant persecution of LIEberals. It's like some kind of scary, futuristic science fiction movie!!

All my rights are gone. As a good True Christian, if I want to tie up a homer, douse him with gasoline and set him alight to give him a taste of eternal hellfire, all of a sudden I'M the bad guy. The liberal activist judges, big city police, hippy liberal DEMONstrators, and the LIEberal media would portray me as a bad person-- which I'm not. Just because as a Christian I believe that all homos should be burned alive as an abomination to God, then I'm subject to relentless religious persecution.

That is just ONE illustration of the oppression of wealthy white male suburban Christians in this country. The same unfair and outrageous religious persecution would happen if I tried to gas Joos, hang uppity Negroes, shoot a hippie in the neck, or firebomb a mosque. We wealthy Christian male Republicans are totally helpless, with no more rights at all. Sometimes I wonder if I'm still living in America.