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  • Glendora Christianson
    Spiritual Mother of LBC
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 2329
    #1

    Welcome to Wedding Bells!

    With high wedding season coming up, it is important to stay on the right rutting path. Warning! IF IT ISN'T A LANDOVER BAPTIST WEDDING IT IS A FALSE CHRISTIAN WEDDING AND IS DOOMED TO FAIL!

    On a better note, I am excited to introduce Sisters Thumper and Sue Vera as your Cyber Bridesmaids and Brother Zeke as every man's Best Man! Weddings are a nervous time for many folks, so let GOD's favorite church lead you down the right path.
    Attached Files
    Last edited by Glendora Christianson; 05-17-2008, 04:23 PM. Reason: picture removed due to homosexual content (sorry Jesus)
    Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
    Tags: None
    • Stuck
    • SUV
      True Christian™ Princess
      The Driving Force behind RA12
      Have at it, anytime!
      • Sep 2006
      • 11027
      #2
      Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

      JESUS, Mother Glynndie, I am so HERE!!!!!

      Umm - hasn't the news reached Landover yet about.... Rock Hudson?

        Comment

        • Glendora Christianson
          Spiritual Mother of LBC
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 2329
          #3
          Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

          Originally posted by SUV View Post
          JESUS, Mother Glynndie, I am so HERE!!!!!

          Umm - hasn't the news reached Landover yet about.... Rock Hudson?
          OH! Dear Lord! I can't believe I made that mistake! I guess its a sign that the World really does need our help? I will find a suitable Christian wedding picture and replace it.
          Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.

            Comment

            • SUV
              True Christian™ Princess
              The Driving Force behind RA12
              Have at it, anytime!
              • Sep 2006
              • 11027
              #4
              Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

              Ah yes, so the news is out: A handsome, dashing gentleMan like Mr Rock just doesn't seem to want to be Married

              Maybe if I learn to Bake Snickerdoodles, tho?

                Comment

                • Daisy Mae Johnson
                  The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                  Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                  aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                  True Christian™
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 15708
                  #5
                  Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                  GLORY!!!

                  I'm soooo excited Sisters!! Just imagine all the beautiful dresses we will get to wear!
                  sigpic

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                    Comment

                    • SUV
                      True Christian™ Princess
                      The Driving Force behind RA12
                      Have at it, anytime!
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 11027
                      #6
                      Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                      Here I am! Here I be! Here is your WEDDING BELLE!!!!!!!!!!

                      Any takers?

                        Comment

                        • Daisy Mae Johnson
                          The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                          Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                          aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                          True Christian™
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 15708
                          #7
                          Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                          I'm soooooo excited!

                          I LOVE anything WEDDING!!! Here is a vid I took last year at my cousin Velma's wedding.



                          I was baffled that her son was born 8 months early and still weighed 6 1/2 lbs. See!! JESUS really does provide miracles for his Chosen.

                          GLORY!!!!!
                          sigpic

                          Tweet me Here
                          My GODLY Bio Here

                            Comment

                            • Daisy Mae Johnson
                              The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                              Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                              aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                              True Christian™
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 15708
                              #8
                              Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                              Originally posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
                              With high wedding season coming up, it is important to stay on the right rutting path. Warning! IF IT ISN'T A LANDOVER BAPTIST WEDDING IT IS A FALSE CHRISTIAN WEDDING AND IS DOOMED TO FAIL!

                              On a better note, I am excited to introduce Sisters Thumper and Sue Vera as your Cyber Bridesmaids and Brother Zeke as every man's Best Man! Weddings are a nervous time for many folks, so let GOD's favorite church lead you down the right path.
                              He sure looks like Nixon to me?????

                              Either way in HELL and sucking on Satan's something or other.
                              sigpic

                              Tweet me Here
                              My GODLY Bio Here

                                Comment

                                • Remy Lebeau
                                  LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire
                                  President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association
                                  Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
                                  True Christian™
                                  • Sep 2006
                                  • 2058
                                  #9
                                  Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                                  Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
                                  I'm soooooo excited!

                                  I LOVE anything WEDDING!!! Here is a vid I took last year at my cousin Velma's wedding.



                                  I was baffled that her son was born 8 months early and still weighed 6 1/2 lbs. See!! JESUS really does provide miracles for his Chosen.

                                  GLORY!!!!!
                                  How lovely Sister Thumper.

                                  If any of you ladies plan on going to any of your helps' weddings or allowing them to attend in of yours, god forbid, be warned:

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                                    Comment

                                    • DogSpitAsshatBitch
                                      Confirmed Enemy of God
                                      • May 2008
                                      • 691
                                      #10
                                      Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                                      I am planning for my wedding. Here are my choices of what kinds of wedding I am wanted : Goth, Native American (since I am 35 % Native), and a Wiccan wedding. However my fiancee wants a traditional Christain wedding. I do not want that. So we are choosing to go with his idea or a justice of the peace wedding.

                                        Comment

                                        • Pastor Billy-Reuben
                                          Senior Pastor
                                          VP of Evangelical Outreach
                                          On FIRE for Jesus
                                          True Christian™
                                          • Sep 2006
                                          • 5812
                                          #11
                                          Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                                          Originally posted by BurningWolfspit1989 View Post
                                          However my fiancee wants a traditional Christain wedding.
                                          Why does he want that? Is he a Christian?
                                          Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.

                                          ✝ This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. ✝
                                          Trump / Arpaio 2016 -- The Government We Deserve
                                          #ChristianLivesMatter

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                                            • DogSpitAsshatBitch
                                              Confirmed Enemy of God
                                              • May 2008
                                              • 691
                                              #12
                                              To Paster Billy about Wedding Bells

                                              Paster Billy's Question: Why does he want that? Is he a Christian?

                                              My answer: Well technically he is Protestant.

                                                Comment

                                                • Pastor Billy-Reuben
                                                  Senior Pastor
                                                  VP of Evangelical Outreach
                                                  On FIRE for Jesus
                                                  True Christian™
                                                  • Sep 2006
                                                  • 5812
                                                  #13
                                                  Re: To Paster Billy about Wedding Bells

                                                  Originally posted by DogSpit1989 View Post
                                                  Well technically he is Protestant.
                                                  OK, so he's one of those folks who calls himself a Christian but isn't really saved. In that case, a traditional Christian wedding is probably a bad idea. God actually prefers cold atheists over lukewarm Christians, and a traditional Christian wedding between an lukewarm Christian and a Wiccan would just be mockery.

                                                  Why don't y'all just do one of those pagan knot-tying ceremonies? Maybe sometime in the future after you both get saved, you can renew your vows in a real wedding.

                                                  Pastor Billy-Reuben
                                                  Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.

                                                  ✝ This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. ✝
                                                  Trump / Arpaio 2016 -- The Government We Deserve
                                                  #ChristianLivesMatter

                                                  sigpic

                                                    Comment

                                                    • Old Iron Crotch
                                                      SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
                                                      • May 2007
                                                      • 3056
                                                      #14
                                                      Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                                                      Originally posted by DogSpit1989 View Post
                                                      I am planning for my wedding. Here are my choices of what kinds of wedding I am wanted : Goth, Native American (since I am 35 % Native), and a Wiccan wedding. However my fiancee wants a traditional Christain wedding. I do not want that. So we are choosing to go with his idea or a justice of the peace wedding.

                                                      You could do what we did. We wrote our own wedding ritual, combining elements of my husband's religious traditions and mine, and had a JP make it legal.
                                                      Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!

                                                        Comment

                                                        • DogSpitAsshatBitch
                                                          Confirmed Enemy of God
                                                          • May 2008
                                                          • 691
                                                          #15
                                                          Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

                                                          That sounds cool. I do not think he would go for that though. He is stubborn when it comes to this issue.

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