[SUV]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

I'll get our hook-nosed Shylock lawyers to look into the possibility of legally barring you from our Godly Forums (and 500 miles of Old Man Hatchet) once and for all.

My GOD, Bro Temper. Is she still after poor Brother Hatchet?

[Brother Temperance]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

a restraining order...

That gives me an idea...I'll get our hook-nosed Shylock lawyers to look into the possibility of legally barring you from our Godly Forums (and 500 miles of Old Man Hatchet) once and for all.

[SUV]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

Oh, I really want to cry now that some fat batstard on a forum called me retarded.

And we are proud to be batstards! Nothing more American than baseball.

Now take your sissyfied sock-her ball and vam-moose!

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

I saw a perfectly good white girl holding hands and courting with a black fellow at WalMart not too long ago. Made me so damned mad I went right up and told her Jesus was going to toss her race traitoring behind into the lake of fire if she didn't get right and start dating a normal person. I used my handkerchief to explain how the blacks and the whites are divided on purpose by God and how crossing over Gods will is the same thing as spitting tobacco juice in Jesus Christs eye while He was being crucified by the Jews through the Romans. I showed her that while mans law says we are all equals, Gods law is right there on the other side of the cloth and we need to balance out the two with the Lords will always coming first. Sometimes you can't see Gods way through the cloth. Thats where she was at.
That girl looked like she had seen a ghost and her guy made some sort of gesture like he was wanting to fight. Imagine what kind of animal it takes to fight someone for spreading the Good News of Christ! He was cursing and jumping up and down like a menacing monkey so I had him arrested for threatening me. Hopefully a weekend in jail with his own kind will teach him a lesson.

I think I got through to that young lady. She was so moved by my compassion to see her soul Saved™ that she literally broke down in tears and ran out of the store weeping like a baby. I imagine she went straight home to dig up her dusty Bible and read it. Praise Jesus.

I'd say it's more likely that she went to the nearest police station to file a restraining order against you.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

Back when we followed God's Law instead of Christ-denying sick-ular law, mixed marriages could get the death penalty for you and even collective punishment for people around you, with Divine approval:

Numbers 25:6-13: And, behold, one of the children of Israel came and brought unto his brethren a Midianitish woman in the sight of Moses, and in the sight of all the congregation of the children of Israel, who [were] weeping [before] the door of the tabernacle of the congregation. And when Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the priest, saw [it], he rose up from among the congregation, and took a javelin in his hand; And he went after the man of Israel into the tent, and thrust both of them through, the man of Israel, and the woman through her belly. So the plague was stayed from the children of Israel. And those that died in the plague were twenty and four thousand. And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying, Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the priest, hath turned my wrath away from the children of Israel, while he was zealous for my sake among them, that I consumed not the children of Israel in my jealousy. Wherefore say, Behold, I give unto him my covenant of peace And he shall have it, and his seed after him, [even] the covenant of an everlasting priesthood; because he was zealous for his God, and made an atonement for the children of Israel.

[Marshall]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

I saw a perfectly good white girl holding hands and courting with a black fellow at WalMart not too long ago. Made me so damned mad I went right up and told her Jesus was going to toss her race traitoring behind into the lake of fire if she didn't get right and start dating a normal person. I used my handkerchief to explain how the blacks and the whites are divided on purpose by God and how crossing over Gods will is the same thing as spitting tobacco juice in Jesus Christs eye while He was being crucified by the Jews through the Romans. I showed her that while mans law says we are all equals, Gods law is right there on the other side of the cloth and we need to balance out the two with the Lords will always coming first. Sometimes you can't see Gods way through the cloth. Thats where she was at.
That girl looked like she had seen a ghost and her guy made some sort of gesture like he was wanting to fight. Imagine what kind of animal it takes to fight someone for spreading the Good News of Christ! He was cursing and jumping up and down like a menacing monkey so I had him arrested for threatening me. Hopefully a weekend in jail with his own kind will teach him a lesson.

I think I got through to that young lady. She was so moved by my compassion to see her soul Saved™ that she literally broke down in tears and ran out of the store weeping like a baby. I imagine she went straight home to dig up her dusty Bible and read it. Praise Jesus.

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

A more serious reply. Of course, Hellywood is full of examples!

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

We all know that Queer Weddings are against God, and so are Retard Weddings. God hates fags enough as it is, but to let them Marry is blasphemy! And as for retards, God doesn't even want these abominations anywhere NEAR a Church, let alone INSIDE ONE!

But what other kinds of Weddings shouldn't be allowed?

Thank you for this excellent thread, Brother Percy. I have given it 5 gold stars and an invisible happy face! Anyway, I was googling for a midget and a tall person, because I think it just isn't right in the LORD's eyes (or theirs) but when I googled for ODD COUPLE, I found this cute little picture that I just had to share, so bear with me...

[Brother Temperance]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

Aren't most Democrats gay?

I'm not sure. Kucinich is a notorious queer, which would explain why he needs such an attractive wife as cover. On the other hand, I certainly wouldn't trust Baraq Osambo with a white woman any more than I'd trust him in the White House. Also, I've heard first-hand from an ex-Democrat that John Edwards actually doesn't have anything down there at all. He soldered it all off to appease the feminazis and make him seem like a more credible rival to Hillary, and now he's as smooth as a Ken doll. Jesus weeps at this abuse of the body that Our Father made in His image.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

I've been saying for years from the pulpit that Jesus provided me with that only Certifiable True Christians™ should be allowed to marry. Nobody else has any business going through phony elaborate ceremonies pretending that God sanctions their unsaved coupling.

That would shut those radical queers up right quick.

[Marshall]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

Aren't most Democrats gay?

[Brother Temperance]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

Should Anglicans be allowed to marry? Jesus and I say no. Also, Slick Willy and Hitlery were allowed to marry, and look what happened: he defiled he sanctity of marriage by spilling his seed all over some Jewess. Is this an inevitable consequence every time two Democrats marry? Maybe, maybe not, but I for one am not willing to take the risk.

[Larry Lee]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

You know, God's not too keen on the impure marrying. If you're not on a par with Jesus' own purity, when He presents Himself at the wedding feast, you probably need to think twice about Holy Matrimony as an option suited to you. A roll in the hay; a quickie behind the stadium; a one-time experiment with raw meat, Jeff Koons and a videographer; a lustful heart for Jimmy Carter's Semitic dialogues... Well, they all preclude you from ever participating in the sacrament of marriage, in God®’s eyes. Sorry.

[Marshall]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

Well smartypants, we can't all look like a 40s Jew. Some of us have whats called MUSCLE TONE. Look it up. I realize that term is alien to a Eurotrash elitist such as yourself.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: WEDDINGS THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED...

1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Without Christ, there is no marriage. So no non-Christians should be permitted to wed.