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  • Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

    Also known to the rest of us as "waking up" after "falling asleep" during the most boring game in the world with the score at, let me check... 1 goal after countless interminable hours of coiffed men in colorful shorts prancing around and hugging eachother.
    If I have seen further, it is by standing on the heads of others.

  • #2
    Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

    I have some sympathy for the poor fellow, though. He had played almost 45 minutes of kickball, which everyone agrees is the most pointless game in the world, against a bunch of the Finish, surely the dreariest people in the world. Any one of us might have taken a nap or fallen into a catatonic state.

    One of my boys claims he saw a Finnlandic fire a dart at the fellow, perhaps of the type that they use in Hellsinky to protect themselves from polar bears. If true, this might have added interest to the story. But as the TV wasn't even on, the child has been punished for spreading Fake News.

    Incidentally, the player is (or possibly by now was) called "Christian". And the Fins won the match. God will not be mocked!
    Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!

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    • #3
      Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

      I found this clip online. See if you can stay away long enough to see what they're talking about. It took me several tries and I injured my head in the process - where's my world cup medal?

      If I have seen further, it is by standing on the heads of others.

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      • #4
        Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

        I'll stop being offended by the Negro on the Finnish team when there's a white on the Ethiopian team. Or a Mexican on the Kenyan team. Might as well go whole hog and put a Navajo on the Ugandan team and an Aborigine and a couple Samoans on the team from Burkina Faso.
        I was sinking deep in sin far from the peaceful shore,
        Very deeply stained within, sinking to rise no more;
        But the Master of the Sea heard my despairing cry,
        From the waters lifted me, now safe am I!

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

          It seems it's not just Danish soccerball players who are being knocked down by events at this tournament. Whatever happened to Coca-Cola's stock price?



          It seems that sponsoring Europeon events isn't a great idea when some Portugeezer holds a press conference.



          Curiously, the stock price of Heineken beer went in the other direction. I guess if Mooslims don't like it, that helps?
          Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!

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          • #6
            Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

            Originally posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
            It seems that sponsoring Europeon events isn't a great idea when some Portugeezer holds a press conference.

            Curiously, the stock price of Heineken beer went in the other direction. I guess if Mooslims don't like it, that helps?
            I wonder if HerbalLife managed to sell anything? Cristiano Ronaldo's brand partners (not to be confused with unwilling sex partners) must be so proud at his principled stance (rear entry if you were wondering). Herbal Life tea - for when you have a sportsman's p*nis stuck in your ass.
            Attached Files
            If I have seen further, it is by standing on the heads of others.

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            • #7
              Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

              Originally posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole View Post
              Cristiano Ronaldo....
              How dare he call himself Christian, even if he does mis-spell it?
              Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!

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              • #8
                Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

                the guy literally had a heart attack and collapsed on the field, requiring cpr and a defillibrator.

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                • #9
                  Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

                  Originally posted by AkiraK View Post
                  the guy literally had a heart attack and collapsed on the field, requiring cpr and a defillibrator.
                  Nonsense, dear. The guy was literally smote by Jesus for playing soccer - one thing God hates.
                  Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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                  • #10
                    Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

                    I guess losing a soccerball player to rapid onset boredom must be a blessing in disguise. The surviving players went on to win some matches (or more likely drew 0-0 for sufficiently many hours) and now they will play Great Britain in the semi-finals of whatever competition this is. The plucky Brits won two World Wars and one World Cup so they should feel confident to beat the Nazis again, as I read in The Daily Express.
                    If I have seen further, it is by standing on the heads of others.

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                    • #11
                      Re: Denmark midfielder 'awake' after collapsing on pitch

                      Originally posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole View Post
                      The plucky Brits won two World Wars
                      Correction: The won two world wars pretty much singlehandedly.
                      I was sinking deep in sin far from the peaceful shore,
                      Very deeply stained within, sinking to rise no more;
                      But the Master of the Sea heard my despairing cry,
                      From the waters lifted me, now safe am I!

                      Comment

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