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  • #76
    Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

    I think I'm going to be sick.

    Why in the world would anyone want to put her (or even his) face down THERE?
    Bible boring? Nonsense!
    Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
    You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

    Comment

    • #77
      Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

      Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
      I think I'm going to be sick.

      Why in the world would anyone want to put her (or even his) face down THERE?
      Because she told me to

      Comment

      • #78
        Originally posted by Princess001 View Post
        Because she told me to
        I've been sick in my mouth.

        What else did she tell you to do?
        Posted via Mobile Device
        1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

        Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

        Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

        Comment

        • #79
          Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

          Originally posted by Larni69 View Post
          I've been sick in my mouth.

          What else did she tell you to do?
          Posted via Mobile Device
          She was so bossy I had to do whatever she said.

          Comment

          • #80
            Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

            If you tell me exactly what else she had you do I can report it exactly to wife wife with the stern admonishment not to do exactly what you had to.

            You poor lamb, you.

            Get down with Jesus!
            Posted via Mobile Device
            1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

            Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

            Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

            Comment

            • #81
              Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

              Originally posted by Princess001 View Post
              We only did oral sodomy in the shower
              Only?

              ONLY??

              ONLY???
              The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!

              Comment

              • #82
                Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

                Great.

                I was out all day spreading my Love for Jesus. I arrive home, excitedly log in to Landover to get some comforting Words About God and I have to deal with this foul stench. A few of my girls (the young ones) have run from the room, a high pitched wail of EEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww.
                Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                Comment

                • #83
                  Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

                  Originally posted by James Hutchins View Post
                  Great.

                  I was out all day spreading my Love for Jesus. I arrive home, excitedly log in to Landover to get some comforting Words About God and I have to deal with this foul stench. A few of my girls (the young ones) have run from the room, a high pitched wail of EEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww.
                  Brother, I did warn you about adding Smell-O-Vision to your computer.

                  You may wish to avoid the "True Christian One Sentence Story" in the Lounge. It's featuring one Dora Denkins!
                  Bible boring? Nonsense!
                  Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                  You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                  Comment

                  • #84
                    Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

                    Princess, I just wanted to thank you for your honesty and transparency. I showed this thread to my husband and he's been reading it and rereading it for days. I know he's been thinking about this hard because he's been in his prayer closet much more than usual since I've shared your trauma. We both feel very strongly that our daughters should never, ever choose this lifestyle and this conversation has reinvigorated our motivations to keep them in the house and separated from society until the LORD has deigned to provide with them suitable husbands.
                    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                    Comment

                    • #85
                      Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

                      Originally posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
                      Princess, I just wanted to thank you for your honesty and transparency. I showed this thread to my husband and he's been reading it and rereading it for days. I know he's been thinking about this hard because he's been in his prayer closet much more than usual since I've shared your trauma. We both feel very strongly that our daughters should never, ever choose this lifestyle and this conversation has reinvigorated our motivations to keep them in the house and separated from society until the LORD has deigned to provide with them suitable husbands.
                      Thank you.

                      Comment

                      • #86
                        Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

                        Originally posted by Princess001 View Post
                        Thank you.
                        But you're still having sexural fantasies about that wetback slut Selena wrapping her legs around your head and forcing you to service her cooter with your mouth, right?
                        Who Will Jesus Damn?

                        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                        Comment

                        • #87
                          Re: We Have a Lezbean in Our Midst!

                          Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                          But you're still having sexural fantasies about that wetback slut Selena wrapping her legs around your head and forcing you to service her cooter with your mouth, right?
                          Ummm, only a little.

                          Comment

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