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Does he hate orgasms or does he just hate the spilling of the seed?
Just want a good answer on this.
In Christ,
Brother Matthew.
Just want a good answer on this.
In Christ,
Brother Matthew.
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
What are you talking about? Seed has nothing to do with Japanese paper folding.Originally posted by Brother_Matt View Post
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
Good point, Bobby-Joe!Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
Brother Matt, perhaps when you get to Heaven (er, assuming you get yourself Saved©), you can give Jesus a nice orgasm, made by your own hands. Maybe a swan or something? See if He casts it into Hell.
If not, I'd say He doesn't hate orgasm.
Were I in your shoes, I'd practice my orgasm every day to be sure to give Him the very best orgasm possible on that blessed day. Watch out for paper cuts!www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
Huckabee/PalinGingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!
Christian Ladies:
Savor your separation in style at the Monthly Visitor!Comment
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
Hmmm...thanks for the replies. I feel kinda bad for asking this question. Oh, well...Comment
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
Brother, I'm fairly sure that JESUS would not disapprove of your origasmi ...Originally posted by Brother_Matt View Post
... as long as you are careful and do not fold, bend or multilate your figures into shapes that are displeasing in His sight!
Else He might slap you upside the head! Praise! Sister Noddy
1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...
1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...
Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...Comment
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
"Brother" Matt, if you ever find yourself Saved(c) and happen to make it to Heaven, I strongly recommend that you not present Jesus with an Origasmi Boulder. I'm certain He would be offended that you plagiarized this artistic concept; after all, plagiarism is stealing, and stealing is a sin!
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
We need to be very careful here.
Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. Exodus 20:4
I'm not sure whether these origasmi things are "graven" images, but do you want to take that chance with your immortal soul? In any event, however, I don't see how your seed might come into this.
Pour out thy fury upon the heathen that know thee not, and upon the families that call not on thy name.... Jeremiah 10:25Comment
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
An orgasm is really more of a folded figure, as opposed to a graven one. Anyway flowers and airplanes are certain to be safe for orgasms. I mean no objects to Sister Talitha's big pink 767 model she keeps in her living room since it is a molded figure. I am certain it would hold true if she has a orgasm of a 767.Originally posted by Ahimaaz Smith View Post
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
I don't want to talk about any of this Jappo stuff. It's likely to bring Hitonmi out from under his plate of gooshi-sooshi
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
What's an orgasm?
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!Comment
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
I'm sure Sister Thumper doesn't know either.Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
Who posted this message! I want him banned NOW! Oh he's already banned.Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.Comment
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
I agree with Ba donka donk and to all vaginal circumstances.
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
I never agree with anyone calling themselves Ba donka donk. In any circumstances.Originally posted by Coon Fish View PostI agree with Ba donka donk and to all vaginal circumstances.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
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God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.Comment
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Re: Does Jesus hate orgasms?
Surely, you have no idea what a Ba Donka Donk is.Originally posted by Brother Temperance View PostI never agree with anyone calling themselves Ba donka donk. In any circumstances.
How lame.
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