Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

[Pastor Ezekiel]

As we all know, Christ-killing joos will stop at nothing to destroy Christianity. THIS story claims that they are now preparing to unveil their latest attempt.

Film Claim: Jesus' Body Found

Efforts to discredit Jesus' resurrection continue

WASHINGTON, Feb. 23 /Christian Newswire/ -- A liberal website out of Jerusalem, Israel is reporting that a documentary film to be aired this week will prove the actual burial site for Jesus Christ and his family has been found. The filmmakers, including James Cameron of Titanic fame, claim they will display the coffins of Jesus and his mother Mary at a New York news conference on Monday.

The implications are clear: According the filmmakers, Jesus did not rise from the grave.

In response to the announced news conference, National Clergy Council president, the Reverend Rob Schenck (pronounced SHANK) said:

“This kind of sensationalism has been tried before. Only five years ago no less of a prestigious organization than Biblical Archeological Review Journal claimed it had the coffin of James, the brother of Jesus. It was later determined to be a hoax.

“These filmmakers, who have an obvious bias against Christianity, say the evidence in this case rests on the names inscribed on the coffins and DNA testing. First, the names Jesus, Mary, Joseph and the others they will cite, were some of the most common for that region at that time. Second, there are no known descendants of Mary alive today, so what does DNA have to do with it?

“Thinking people should take this announcement with a grain of salt.”

Rev. Schenck is also chairman of the Committee on Church and Society for the Evangelical Church Alliance, America’s oldest association of evangelical clergy. The National Clergy Council is based in Washington, DC, and represents conservative church leaders from all Christian traditions.

Our own Pastor Pistle has flown in to investigate the situation. Praise Jesus, I have no doubt that HE can set them straight.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

As we all know, Christ-killing joos will stop at nothing to destroy Christianity. THIS story claims that they are now preparing to unveil their latest attempt.

I see the JOOs are up to their old tricks again. Guy Thorne was a prophet.

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

The plot(!) thickens. They even have their own website, which will be launched tomorrow (Feb. 26th): www.jesusfamilytomb.com

How can they find Jesus' tomb, when we all know the grave was empty? How can they find His bones, when He ascended on the 40th day? What good would a DNA-test be, when Jesus is the son of God? Have they found God's DNA somewhere?

I shudder to think what hideous lies there will be on that site (tomorrow at 11:30am EST).

[Mrs. Rogers]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

The Jooz can't find $1 collectively in their moth-eaten purses to donate to JESUS' favourite church, and yet they can find His body? Do they think we're all as gullible as Soon Yi?!

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

This is a subtle and insidious attempt by atheists under the guidance of Satan undermine Christianity; to disprove this simple hoax Christians will be forced to counter by showing the names “Jesus” and “Mary” were extremely common in Judah during Jesus’ earthly ministry. Satan’s next step will be to have his meat puppets point out how this invalidates any record of anyone named Jesus because how will we know which Jesus is being referred to? Then these atheists, to glorify their master in hell, will drive home their evil attack saying The Synoptic Gospels in The Bible is on equally doubtful footing because it could be nothing more than a confused recollection of the lives of several men named Jesus written two generations after the events happened.

Christians must not fall for this trap! Satan inspired the Joos to name their children so unimaginatively specifically to create confusion among those weak of faith! When faced by confusion like this Christians must focus themselves and think logically and rationally; the key point to remember is God wrote the Bible* and God isn’t going to forget who His Only Begotten Son® is after forty years.**

Be strong with The Lord brethren.

*using King James as a pen
**or 1611 years for that matter.

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

Then these atheists, so glorify their master in hell, will drive home their evil attack saying [B]The Synoptic Gospels in The Bible is on equally doubtful footing because it could be nothing more than a confused recollection of the lives of several men named Jesus written two generations after the events happened.

That wouldn't be the first time they tried this strategy, brother. They are always seeing patterns and conspiracies where there are none. Take the example of Jesus, son of Ananus.

Just because they are both named Jesus, both lived in the 1st century, both came to Jerusalem during a pilgrim festival, both shouted "woe up the Jerusalem, the temple and the people", both were unlearned, both were supposed to be demon possessed, both were guided by a supernatural force, both were arrested by the Joos, both were beaten by the Joos, both remained silent, both were handed over to the Roman authorities, both refused to answer, both were scourged by the Romans and just because the Romans wanted to free them both, and both were killed by the Romans doesn't mean their stories are related.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

That wouldn't be the first time they tried this strategy, brother. They are always seeing patterns and conspiracies where there are none. Take the example of Jesus, son of Ananus.

Just because they are both named Jesus, both lived in the 1st century, both came to Jerusalem during a pilgrim festival, both shouted "woe up the Jerusalem, the temple and the people", both were unlearned, both were supposed to be demon possessed, both were guided by a supernatural force, both were arrested by the Joos, both were beaten by the Joos, both remained silent, both were handed over to the Roman authorities, both refused to answer, both were scourged by the Romans and just because the Romans wanted to free them both, and both were killed by the Romans doesn't mean their stories are related.

Godly point Brother Prune; this is a good example of the false common Jesus Satan had seeded the Holy Land with. Do not be suckered by such snares the Father of All Lies lays for you brethren. Josephus just got our loving Savior Jesus Christ mixed up with the twenty or so Jesus, son of Joseph who just by pure coincidences were holy men preaching religious reform and performing miracles during Jesus’ life time. These kind of mistakes can happen with humans, not God, and it was God who wrote The Bible.

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

Godly point Brother Prune; this is a good example of the false common Jesus Satan had seeded the Holy Land with. Do not be suckered by such snares the Father of All Lies lays for you brethren. Josephus just got our loving Savior Jesus Christ mixed up with the twenty or so Jesus, son of Joseph who just by pure coincidences were holy men preaching religious reform and performing miracles during Jesus’ life time. These kind of mistakes can happen with humans, not God, and it was God who wrote The Bible.

Well, their site is open now. I'm going to enter it (like Daniel entered the lions' den) and see what it's all about: http://www.jesusfamilytomb.com

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

That wouldn't be the first time they tried this strategy, brother. They are always seeing patterns and conspiracies where there are none. Take the example of Jesus, son of Ananus.

Just because they are both named Jesus, both lived in the 1st century, both came to Jerusalem during a pilgrim festival, both shouted "woe up the Jerusalem, the temple and the people", both were unlearned, both were supposed to be demon possessed, both were guided by a supernatural force, both were arrested by the Joos, both were beaten by the Joos, both remained silent, both were handed over to the Roman authorities, both refused to answer, both were scourged by the Romans and just because the Romans wanted to free them both, and both were killed by the Romans doesn't mean their stories are related.

I should certainly hope not! Everyone knows Jesus was the Son of God, and the Almighty God is most certainly not Ananus!

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

Pastor Zeke, I wish I had let Elmer click on that disturbing link. And I would suggest that all good Christian women go back to their ironing/baking. But I can't hope but wonder if that Cameron is just trying to ruin our Easter. I CONSIDER THE WHOLE THING A HATE CRIME! DISTURBED GLENDORA

[Alaric Reinner]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

Well that’s sad archeologist should not jump to conclusions when they find a skeleton, even I don’t believe that load of hogwash. Sadly they have no means to prove it to be Jesus’ body DNA wont work and assuming from the name on the coffin is no reason to believe it is Jesus Christ

Some people are trying to undermine 2 major religions quite horribly

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

Mother Glendora!

I'm actually relieved to see that your post here is in reference to James Cameroon's latest fantasy flick. I thought perhaps you were referencing this article!

Mysterious, Large Ice Chunk Falls on Tampa Man's Car

TAMPA, FL (AP) -- Raymond Rodriguez was changing a tire when a man-sized chunk of ice plummeted from the sky with a piercing whistle, then a metallic crunch. The ice chunk crushed the roof of a nearby Ford Mustang on Sunday morning. No one was hurt.

"SWEET JESUS, I yelled," Rodriguez said, who was only feet away at the moment. "It's crazy, man, but that's just what it looks like."

The Federal Aviation Administration is reviewing flight schedules to see if the ice fell off a plane. The ice did not have a blue tint that would indicate it came from a plane's lavatory. The National Weather Service said conditions in Tampa were not favorable for the formation of large balls of ice, known as megacryometeors.

"Is an act of God," said Carlos Javage, whose son's car was wrecked by the mystery ice, which was whisked away by authorities minutes after impact. "This ice, we say it is a sign from God, warning of the second coming! It look just like Jesus!"

Miami preacher John Kane went one step farther. "Now, I'm not sure why He picked this part of Tampa, and I'm not sure why He picked a Ford Mustang. What I do know is, this "ice" is the Holy Soul of our Savior, Jesus Christ!"

When pressed, Kane continued. "In my book, Christsicle, I put forth my theory that the age of miracles ended with Christ's ascension because God left Him frozen in the outer atmosphere of Earth."

Christsicle, eh? So why would God leave Jesus frozen for two thousand years?

"As you see in the Bible, Jesus had a moment of weakness on the cross, asking why God had forsaken Him. God decided to really give Jesus something to cry about!"

An interesting theory, to say the least. But why would Jesus fall to the ground now?

"Either it's time for the Second Coming," Kane explained, "in which case Jesus will be defrosting shortly, or He just fell out of orbit. We should know in . . . about 7 hours, by my calculations. Unless those CIA antiChrists have stuck him in the deep freeze! They may not want anyone to know the truth!"

This reporter will be checking her watch, while wondering exactly why the authorities wouldn't allow any photographs of the ice.

[Brother Love]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

This is just one more LIE and DECEPTION from no one else other than the DEVIL himself!! Satan is arrogant BEYOND belief and NOTHING will stop his arrogance especially when it comes to leading people away from JESUS. He will go to ANY lengths to accomplish his EVIL and VILE mission and attempt to set his DARK THRONE above the Throne of the Lord!! All the people involved with this FAKERY are nothing but UNSAVED TRASH and SCUM OF THE DEVIL HIMSELF! Pastor Pistle DON'T waste your time looking into this matter as we already know it's a LIE from the LIE-beral HEATHENS that so plague our great nation today!!

JESUS IS LORD!!

[Rev. Dr. Davidson]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

Well that’s sad archeologist should not jump to conclusions when they find a skeleton, even I don’t believe that load of hogwash. Sadly they have no means to prove it to be Jesus’ body DNA wont work and assuming from the name on the coffin is no reason to believe it is Jesus Christ

It's interesting to see you type the above. It's the same conclusion any sane True Christian™ would come to. Even I know that DNA will do no good, unless they had Jesus' DNA to compare to. Sure the people in that crypt might be of the same family, possible even 3 or 4 generations worth. All it proves is that they're grve robbers at best. At worst, they're just trying to drive up DVD sales through the contraversy.

The joos have always hated Christianity, even as many of them hated Christ himself. Why do they hate him so? Well, from my research, Jesus was in the way of the powerful rabbis who were taking a big chunk of the average people's money/goods.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Kikes Claim Jesus' Body Found

It's interesting to see you type the above. It's the same conclusion any sane True Christian™ would come to. Even I know that DNA will do no good, unless they had Jesus' DNA to compare to. Sure the people in that crypt might be of the same family, possible even 3 or 4 generations worth. All it proves is that they're grave robbers at best. At worst, they're just trying to drive up DVD sales through the contraversy.

The joos have always hated Christianity, even as many of them hated Christ himself. Why do they hate him so? Well, from my research, Jesus was in the way of the powerful rabbis who were taking a big chunk of the average people's money/goods.

Exactly. The Pharisees were the Catholic Church of their day, only slightly less paedophilic.