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  #1  
Old 12-07-2009, 01:09 PM
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Default Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Pray that the sin-sick nation of Denmark falls into the sea!

In Copenhagen the headlines read: "Prostitutes offer free climate summit sex!"

That's right, my brethren in Christ, the fallen women of that city will give sexural favors to the Satan-deluded attendees of a summit meeting about so-called global warming. They'll be warmer, all right, as they ROAST in Satan's FIREPLACE!

Why, I have half a mind to hop a jet to Copenhagen (CopenHELLen!) and investigate this on the ground. Shameful!

Pray for the ascension of Jesus over the fallen kingdoms of Europe.

~~ OEJ
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  #2  
Old 12-07-2009, 01:15 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

I believe there is a word for girls who advertise their willingness to commit fornications with any and all takers...

WHORE!

I suppose the boy whores are matching the offer of their girl counterparts as well?

I'd better investigate this one too. Why don't I pick you up in the Landover Lear Jet brother Jack, and we'll both go sniff around over there in slutville, Denmark. Maybe Rev. Jim would like to join us. I wonder if he can clear his calender.
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Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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  #3  
Old 12-07-2009, 01:23 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Shocking! My daily quota of indignation is overflowing!

I have left a message with Pastor Prune Danish’s (our “Apostle of The North”) wife, as she informs me that he left for the Conference area as soon as the news was announced on Danish TV.

I think we can look forward to seeing some action from Pastor Prune.
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  #4  
Old 12-07-2009, 01:35 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

That's only about 8 hours away. I better go join him. What should I write on my sign?
Favorite anti-whore verse anyone?
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5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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  #5  
Old 12-07-2009, 01:55 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Am:2:7:b and a man and his father will go in unto the same maid, to profane my holy name:
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  #6  
Old 12-07-2009, 02:00 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Eze:23:43: Then said I unto her that was old in adulteries, Will they now commit whoredoms with her, and she with them?
Eze:23:44: Yet they went in unto her, as they go in unto a woman that playeth the harlot: so went they in unto Aholah and unto Aholibah, the lewd women.
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  #7  
Old 12-07-2009, 02:16 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

I can be there in a few hours with Virgin Airlines. I'll bring my bullhorn and my "God hates Denmark" signs. Any objections from the Pastors?

God controls the climate, end of.
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  #8  
Old 12-07-2009, 02:51 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
Shocking! My daily quota of indignation is overflowing!

I have left a message with Pastor Prune Danish’s (our “Apostle of The North”) wife, as she informs me that he left for the Conference area as soon as the news was announced on Danish TV.

I think we can look forward to seeing some action from Pastor Prune.
I think we should all go, brother. There are simply too many whores and liberal tree huggers for a mere handful of Chritian Warriors. I am having some COP15 ID's made up because we need to lure them in somehow. Then we can preach the word and Save some souls.
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Old 12-07-2009, 03:58 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

I wish I could make it but I think I'll be busy tomorrow. I'll pray for you pastors that your message is received and that you are given the proper respect that you deserve.
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Old 12-07-2009, 04:19 PM
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Well, I guess I know where to go to find Pastor Kenneth now. He was always Right up-front to lead the Christian Soldiers on.
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  #11  
Old 12-07-2009, 04:25 PM
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Jeb Stuart Thurmond Jeb Stuart Thurmond is offline
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Copenhagen Council and Lord Mayor Ritt Bjerregaard have sent postcards out to 160 Copenhagen hotels urging COP15 guests and delegates to ‘Be sustainable – don’t buy sex’.
Copenhagan's government agrees with us: climate change is caused by sin, not by carbon.
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Old 12-07-2009, 04:26 PM
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Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Remy Lebeau View Post
I think we should all go, brother. There are simply too many whores and liberal tree huggers for a mere handful of Chritian Warriors. I am having some COP15 ID's made up because we need to lure them in somehow. Then we can preach the word and Save some souls.
Excellent! I knew we could rely on you.

A message from Pastor Prune's wife, confirms that he's saving fallen women from sin, for $10 he'll save you a blonde one. So there'll be plenty of subjects for Salvation™ to go round.
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Old 12-07-2009, 04:44 PM
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Wide-Open Wide-Open is offline
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Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Remy Lebeau View Post
I think we should all go, brother. There are simply too many whores and liberal tree huggers for a mere handful of Chritian Warriors. I am having some COP15 ID's made up because we need to lure them in somehow. Then we can preach the word and Save some souls.
Brother Remy, if there's anything these whores need, it is your input.

You know how these Europeans get, with all their preconceived ideas, and having a stern seeing to from an ex-Negro like yourself will quickly silence those harlots (or make them cry out "JESUS!")!

Maybe Pastor Zeke can pick you up, so you can discuss your strategy on the plane.

And WHERE IS PORTWAY WHEN WE NEED HIM?
__________________
Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.
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  #14  
Old 12-07-2009, 04:49 PM
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Wide-Open Wide-Open is offline
Director of European Evangelical Outreach
A Shining Example of Christ's Love
Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
 

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Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
So there'll be plenty of subjects for Salvation™ to go round.
Do we know the Danish word for "Tithe"? Is it Bryst? It may come in handy.
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Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.
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  #15  
Old 12-07-2009, 05:02 PM
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eliot mayfield eliot mayfield is offline
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

6:29DatumOdkud/Přestup/KamPříj.Odj.Pozn. Spoje 8.12.Praha hl.n. 6:29 178 Johannes Brahms Berlin Hbf (tief) 11:1911:25 ICE 796 Hamburg Hbf 13:0113:28 ICE 35 Koebenhavn H 18:11 Celkový čas 11 hod 42 min, vzdálenost 1064 km
  • České dráhy, a.s.; nábřeží L.Svobody 1222/12, 110 15 Praha 1; +420 840 112 113 (Praha hl.n.->Schöna Gr.)
    Deutsche Bahn AG; Potsdamer Platz 2, 10785 Berlin (Schöna Gr.->Berlin Südkreuz) (EC 178)
Looks like I'll get there in the evening, if I leave tomorrow morning.
__________________
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


http://www.shangrala.org/Pictures/Christ%20Michael.jpg
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  #16  
Old 12-07-2009, 05:07 PM
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Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

What is that demon tongue! Do devils beset your keyboard?
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  #17  
Old 12-07-2009, 05:13 PM
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eliot mayfield eliot mayfield is offline
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
What is that demon tongue! Do devils beset your keyboard?
That's czechoslovakian, German, and Dutchanese.
__________________
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


http://www.shangrala.org/Pictures/Christ%20Michael.jpg
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  #18  
Old 12-07-2009, 05:27 PM
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Wide-Open Wide-Open is offline
Director of European Evangelical Outreach
A Shining Example of Christ's Love
Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
 

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Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Wide-Open will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield View Post
That's czechoslovakian, German, and Dutchanese.
Brother, that travel schedule might make you end up in Germany! Using PUBLIC TRANSPORT!

Where are we going to meet up? Here?


(Her legs look a bit odd TBH. Is she sitting on a fish? )
__________________
Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.
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  #19  
Old 12-07-2009, 05:34 PM
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eliot mayfield eliot mayfield is offline
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Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wide-Open View Post
Brother, that travel schedule might make you end up in Germany! Using PUBLIC TRANSPORT!

Where are we going to meet up? Here?


(Her legs look a bit odd TBH. Is she sitting on a fish? )
It looks like the train stops in "Koebenhavn" wherever that is. I guess I'll just follow the trail on stoned hippies laying on the sidewalk to get to the action and start protesting.
What is the ETA on the others? We should concentrate our efforts for maximum penetration.
__________________
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


http://www.shangrala.org/Pictures/Christ%20Michael.jpg
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  #20  
Old 12-07-2009, 05:44 PM
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Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
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Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Cream-filled Danish: Prostitutes offer free sex

For all those travelling to Copenhagen (83 and rising so far on the Landover Jet) can I please remind you to read Ge:38:13: to 26, which sets the Godly scene.

Judah buys a wife, Tamar, for his son Er, who is then slain by The Lord. Judah instructs Onan to marry Tamar. Onan is not please with this idea and “spills his seed upon the ground.” Thus The Lord slew Onan as well. (There’s a lesson for young men here.) Judah is now running out of sons but has a young one call Shelah. So he tells Tamar to wait in her father’s house until Shelah is old enough (probably around 12).

Tamar did this but even when Shelah became a man, he was not given Tamar.

After some years, Judah’s daughter died and, to find solitude he went off to see some sheepshearing. Now Tamar heard of this and took off her widows clothes and dressed as a harlot, a veil covering her face. When Judah passed by her, he thought her to be a prostitute, so he asked her how much she charged.

It turned out that her price was a goat and, not having a goat immediately to hand, Judah gave her his ring as a deposit. And “went in unto her.” He later came back with the goat but Tamar had gone.

Tamar became pregnant as a result, and three months later was dragged out to be burned as a harlot. However, Tamar now produces Judah’s ring, to which Judah commented, Ge:38:26: And Judah acknowledged them, and said, She hath been more righteous than I; because that I gave her not to Shelah my son. And he knew her again no more.

Morals: 1. we see the delightfully clear reasoning as to why prostitutes should be burned (or not.) 2. Always carry cash (or a goat.)
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