Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

[Luci Mourningstar]

I have been looking forward to having a full time cook and gardener in Heaven, but with only white Americans there, who will do all the menial work?



I really need a break from it. Here on earth I don't mind being a slave to my husband, but I think us good Christian women need a break in heaven.

[Nobar King]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

I'm hoping my lawn cuts itself when I get there.

[Gemira]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

I'm hoping my lawn cuts itself when I get there.

you forgot the other half of the joke

[Luci Mourningstar]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

I'm hoping my lawn cuts itself when I get there.

I mow the lawn. I cannot expect my husband to spend his free time mowing the lawn. He needs to relax in front of the internet where he looks at religious websites.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

I think watching to the damned in hell will be the most popular form of entertainment in heaven.

[hopeneverdies]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

Or maybe just being so close to Our Lord will be enough.

Of course you can always look to the damned

[Wide-Open]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

Hate to break this to you Luci, but our church is still not clear on whether wimmins will get to go to heaven. It's a long story, but it is possible they fall by the wayside, like dogs, or ticks and chiggers.

The Pastors are still not in agreement on this one, but many think women won't go to Heaven.

I imagine Heavenly dishes do themselves. Or maybe the harlots in hell will have to do the catering for us!

[Luci Mourningstar]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

Hate to break this to you Luci, but our church is still not clear on whether wimmins will get to go to heaven. It's a long story, but it is possible they fall by the wayside, like dogs, or ticks and chiggers.

The Pastors are still not in agreement on this one, but many think women won't go to Heaven.

I am trying to have as many babies as possible.

1 Timothy 2:15:

"Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety."

I hope it will save me.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

I hope it will save me.

I hope that too, so my wife can keep serving me if I go to Heaven.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

I hope it will save me.

As you should hope.

Still, Eve was just a "spare rib" - if you pardon me the expression, and look at the mess she got us into.

She was a boy-toy, according to our glorious KJV, for Adam.

Let's face it: she was his Labrador. (only less gullible...)

Genesis 2:22
And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

Once in Heaven, it's not clear we'd need more than Brotherly Love(R).

[True Disciple]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

We are promised great riches in heaven (Matthew 6:20-21):

But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.


I'm confident that women, along with other personal possessions, can be taken into heaven with us. If they cannot, I still have 23 ribs left. The Lord will provide!

[MiniMueter]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

Or maybe just being so close to Our Lord will be enough.

Of course you can always look to the damned

Haha.. than you all will see me there .. burning..
I guess the devil is even nicer than your god..
If god is like you believe.. is heaven the strugglin not worth..
so i enjoy me life now.. like I was just in heaven (as i would imagine it is)
and later.. when i'm death.. i burn in hell as my heart burns now.. because i lived and loved (i don't mean sex) with a "burning passion"

hope you can somehow understand my bad english


my opinion i hope you can accept it..



Ps. I don't agree your opinion with the case "my daughter won't marry her rapist"

its not her daughters fault.. even if she were dressed sexy..
man should be satisfied by god.. and if they're not.. they'd better keep them selves under control!

there are many paedophiliac men in the world.. if they rape a young girl.. like 4 years old.. would you also say that it was the fault of this young girl. because she was young??



and to the part with gay boy; even animals are fucking same sexed genus... so its just kind of normal..

if god. would find that sooooo bad.. he'd stop it with his allmightiness..


there are wars on this world.. but god has nothing better to do than let people who are not even responseble for warse burn in hell..



???
i'd be intrested in you opinion..

thx

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

if god. would find that sooooo bad.. he'd stop it with his allmightiness..

That is not how it works. God gave is free will. We can use that free will to do evil and go to hell or to do good as is written in the Bible and go to Heaven.

[MiniMueter]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

That is not how it works. God gave is free will. We can use that free will to do evil and go to hell or to do good as is written in the Bible and go to Heaven.

god gave us a free will to use the free will as a free will..
one day.. a man with a free will found that he should write something like rules because he was bored.. thats what we call bible..

There is something i believe in.. its not your god. i guess.. and even not mine..

there is no hell.. because my god.. would not burn his own children.. he would forgive us for all the mistakes we regret..

und thats also what he teaches us..!

so why should he just stop forgiving us.. when we're death?

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Who is going to cook and clean in Heaven?

I was wondering if I should time responding to you. Seems I was wrong, time wasted.